ANOTHER HOLIDAY
"You two are not to leave the base." General Hammond frowned across his desk at Captain Carter and Doctor Jackson. Daniel glanced sideways at Sam who was staring at the floor, her arms folded across her chest. "Colonel, I need solutions and I need them now," continued the General, as he rubbed his hand across his forehead wearily.
"Yes, sir," replied Jack, eyeing his team-mates suspiciously. "Any news on Teal'c? Or should I say Teal'c's body?"
Ignoring the last part of O'Neill's comment, General Hammond answered, "No, not yet. His description has been circulated, it shouldn't take much longer."
"Yeah, 'big guy, gold tattoo on forehead, doesn't smile much'. He is kind of distinctive..."
"Actually, sir," piped up Daniel, "this 'Teal'c' might smile a lot. After all, it isn't really him."
Jack rolled his eyes. "Thanks for the insight, Daniel." He winced, then corrected himself. "Sorry, I mean Carter. Hell, this is confusing."
"Try looking at it from our perspective, Jack," suggested Sam gloomily.
O'Neill groaned. No matter how hard he tried, his rational mind couldn't accept that Carter and Jackson had switched bodies. And to hear what for all intents and purposes appeared to be Sam call him 'Jack' every time she opened her mouth was unsettling to say the least.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As they left the General's office, Sam grabbed Jack's arm. "Could I have a word with you in private?"
"Sure, excuse us, won't you?" he said, turning to Daniel, who nodded and carried on down the corridor towards the lab.
"Jack, I can't take much more of this. You've got to get us back into our own bodies."
O'Neill sighed and turned to the woman in front of him. "Daniel, I'm doing the best I can here. There isn't a manual to cover this kind of thing."
"Well, you'll just have to try harder!" She looked desperate. "Have you any idea what it's like being trapped in Sam's body?" Jack opened his mouth, then closed it again. For once he was at a loss for something to say. "I had a shower earlier. That was the single most embarrassing event of my life so far."
"Why? Who else was in the locker room?" enquired Jack.
"No-one! Have you tried having a shower without looking or thinking about what you're... soaping?"
Jack tried to look sympathetic. "I'm sure under the circumstances Sam won't mind."
"Oh, I think she will. If I have this body much longer, it'll be a complete mess. Unrecognisable. I can't get her hair to look right, I daren't even *try* to put any make-up on..."
The Colonel raised his hand slightly in an effort to halt this flow of revelations which had already descended into 'more information than he wanted to know' territory.
Daniel was completely oblivious. "And do you have any idea how difficult it is to undo a bra?"
Jack cringed and looked over his shoulder, making sure no-one had overheard. "Daniel, surely you must have...?"
"I meant when you're wearing it!"
Jack raised his eyebrows and looked at his colleague. He saw a beautiful, blonde-haired, blue-eyed woman, her face slightly flushed from annoyance. It was very difficult to accept that this 'person' was Daniel.
"And you can quit looking at me like that!"
The Colonel was getting even more confused. "Like what?"
"Like you're imagining that I'm naked!"
"I'm not!"
"Oh yes you are. You've been doing it all day! Do you always look at Sam like that? I'm surprised she hasn't hit you."
"Danny, you're not my type..."
Sam puffed out her cheeks. "Sorry. I shouldn't have gone off the deep end like that. But have you any idea what this is like for me?"
"Weird?" suggested Jack.
Sam shook her head and folded her arms across her chest. "Weird doesn't even begin to cover it. And Jack, just remember who's inside this body because if you look at me like that again, I'll hit you myself!" She turned on her heel and stormed off down the corridor, as Jack watched her retreating back, a dazed expression on his face.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A couple of hours later...
Sam stood outside the men's room and debated what to do. Only SG1, Janet and General Hammond knew what had happened, to the rest of the base she was Doctor Daniel Jackson. She couldn't go into the Ladies, it'd totally destroy Daniel's reputation as a perfect gentleman. Taking a deep breath she opened the door.
Emerging a few minutes later, there was a satisfied smile on Daniel's face. *Much* more convenient, particularly when they were on missions. And, of course, there was never a queue. Being that little bit taller and stronger was good too.
As she made her way to the lab, she noticed a female lieutenant approaching her. Sam smiled, and to her astonishment the officer winked and blew her a kiss. Hurrying on her way, she reflected that although she had been aware that their archaeologist had quite a following amongst the few females on the base, she hadn't realised how obvious they could be. Initially, she had been shocked by some of the lustful looks she'd been given but now she'd kind of got used to it. By her calculations, that had been the fourth wink and the second blown kiss she'd witnessed and she'd only been in Daniel's body a few hours. Sam wondered if Daniel had noticed. Shrugging to herself, she shook her head. Probably not.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In another corridor...
Jack turned the corner and bumped into Daniel. Literally. He clutched at his friend's elbows to steady himself.
"Sorry, sir."
The Colonel winced. He was *never* going to get used to this. "Just try and look where you're going, Carter. Any progress with Machello?"
"Not really, sir. He won't co-operate. He wants his freedom in Teal'c's body. I made him go and see Teal'c. They're talking now. I hope it does some good."
"Yeah, let's hope so." Jack found himself staring at Daniel who had a strange expression on his face. There was a kind of glow in those misty blue eyes, a glow that was directed at him. Jack licked his lips nervously and looked at the floor. Carter, he had to remember this was Carter. But no matter what he told himself, he still couldn't bring himself to look Daniel in the face. Yes, Daniel had been right, weird didn't begin to cover this... "I've got to go. Paperwork to do. You know how it is..." he stammered. Still not looking at Daniel he said, "See you later," and set off down the corridor like a man possessed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Holy Hannah, that was strange, Sam thought, as she watched her commanding officer disappear down the corridor. Not like him at all. He'd refused to look her in the eye and had been so nervous he was almost twitching. And Jack O'Neill willingly going to do paperwork? There was definitely something wrong.
Sighing quietly to herself, she guessed that once he got used to the body switch thing he'd be OK, but he did keep forgetting who was who. She took off Daniel's glasses and massaged the bridge of her nose. Peering into the middle distance, she found herself squinting. How on earth did Daniel ever manage without his glasses? Everything was out of focus, a cacophony of blurred shapes and colours. She perched the glasses back on her nose, pushed them into position with her index finger and set off towards the infirmary.
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An hour later...
Jack marched into the infirmary and surveyed the rest of his team. "You got this under control, Carter?" he asked the long-haired, bespectacled man fiddling with the switching device.
"Yes, sir." He looked up. "This is kind of complicated so if you all bear with me and follow my instructions, I'd be grateful." There was a murmur of assent. "Right, first I'll switch with Machello in Teal'c's body." They gripped the device, there was a faint hum and they both tensed slightly.
Jack stared at them both curiously.
"Oh wow! The symbiont feels really strange," intoned Teal'c's deep voice. "I wonder if the sensation is similar to carrying a baby?" The Jaffa was peering at his stomach and touching it experimentally.
"Yeah, that worked! That's Carter!" mumbled Jack, to no-one in particular.
"Now the other two switch," continued the Jaffa. Sam pushed the machine over to the hospital bed and lifted Machello's hands so they were resting on the handles. Then she took hold of the device herself. Everyone waited expectantly.
Sam's delicate eyebrows went up. "This feels most curious, Captain Carter," she said.
Jack exhaled slowly and frowned. This was getting weirder and weirder but at least it seemed to be working.
"Now Machello and Daniel." The machine hummed again as the exchange was made.
"Oh YES!" exclaimed Daniel, punching a fist in the air.
"And finally, me and Teal'c."
As Sam and Teal'c gripped the handles, Jack found himself holding his breath and hoping fervently that this would work.
When they released the machine, the Jaffa inclined his head graciously towards Sam. "Thank you, Captain Carter, I am myself once more."
Sam allowed herself a satisfied smile. Jack grinned at her and raised his eyebrows questioningly. She nodded. Waves of relief washed over him. He crossed the room in two strides, enveloped her in a crushing hug and kissed her full on the mouth. When he released her she stared at him incredulously.
"What was that for?"
He smiled. "Being you."
The End.
Story Notes: Email: wendyparkinson@hotmail.com
Category: Challenge Response, a little S/J
Spoilers: Holiday
Rating: PG
Content Warnings: none
Summary: An alternative version of Holiday.
Archive: "Heliopolis" and "Sam and Jack"
Date: 30/8/99
Author's Notes: This is my response to Michelle's challenge to write an alternative version of Holiday where Sam switches bodies with someone. By its very nature, there is bound to be a certain amount of confusion in this story . I have tried to stick to the name of the 'body' when describing actions (particularly from someone else's point of view) and the name of the 'mind' when describing thoughts and speech. I'm not sure if I've succeeded! I hope you enjoy it anyway (and don't get too confused ).
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters belong to MGM, Gekko Corp and Double Secret Productions. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental.
All feedback and constructive criticism will be greatly appreciated. No flames please.
copyright Wendy Parkinson August 1999
Category: Challenge Response, a little S/J
Spoilers: Holiday
Rating: PG
Content Warnings: none
Summary: An alternative version of Holiday.
Archive: "Heliopolis" and "Sam and Jack"
Date: 30/8/99
Author's Notes: This is my response to Michelle's challenge to write an alternative version of Holiday where Sam switches bodies with someone. By its very nature, there is bound to be a certain amount of confusion in this story . I have tried to stick to the name of the 'body' when describing actions (particularly from someone else's point of view) and the name of the 'mind' when describing thoughts and speech. I'm not sure if I've succeeded! I hope you enjoy it anyway (and don't get too confused ).
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters belong to MGM, Gekko Corp and Double Secret Productions. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental.
All feedback and constructive criticism will be greatly appreciated. No flames please.
copyright Wendy Parkinson August 1999
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]