Entity Epilogue by Ruth M King

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Story Notes: AUTHOR: Ruth M. King ruth@snowqueen.demon.co.uk

ARCHIVE: Sam and Jack, anyone else please ask

SPOILERS: Entity

DISCLAIMERS: Stargate SG1 is the property of MGM, Showtime, Double Secret and Gekko etc. I'm just playing for a while !

NOTES: Please note this was written very quickly....:):) But I just had to :):)

Her hand moves slightly and I start to reach out...then I stop...realising what I was about to do. Sam's face falls, registering her disappointment.

Oh Sam...oh Sam, baby try to understand. Hammond suspects...hell, maybe he knows. I can't jeopardise your career by confirming those suspicions. There's moisture in her eyes and all I want to do is hold her while she cries.

My God it just about told everyone.

"This one has memory of you," it said.

I'm hoping no one realised how intimate that memory was. They probably though that it was just talking about our friendship.....but there's so much more. God, it went into her because it somehow sensed that she was the one person on this base that I would hesitate before killing. How it knew I have no idea. Then again, it was tied into the security system...I'm racking my brains for anything I might have done that betrayed my feelings for Sam. We were sitting next to each other at the briefing....I went down to the MALP room with her....I was the one who volunteered to cut the electricity supply. It makes me wonder about the little things I do for her every day. Does it all mean so much?

"Sir, we'd better get Sam back to the infirmary," Fraiser says, gesturing towards the door.

"Sure...right...."

I look down at Sam, her eyes are fixed on me. That was what was most creepy about when that thing was inside her. It didn't stop looking at me...or maybe it was Sam....shouting for me to get her out of there. The nurses wheel her away, and I trail along behind, still unwilling to leave her. I've been at her side all through this and I don't want to stop now.

Dammit all I want to be able to do is hold her hand! Is that so damn wrong! If it was anyone else in that bed there wouldn't have been a problem, but because it's Sam.....I just want to touch her....

I follow them all the way to the infirmary, hanging back while Janet carries out her examination. Eventually, she gets tired of me and tells me to go and get some sleep.....that's all Sam's going to do for the next twelve hours.....Despite the fact Janet gave me an order I find myself sneaking back an hour later. Just to make sure.

"Sir?" Sam's voice sounds weak.

"I'm here Carter," I reply. "You're supposed to be sleeping."

"So are you."

"Couldn't sleep."

"Me neither."

"Thought you might want some company."

She smiles at me. I find a chair and draw it up to the bedside.

"So...what was it like?" I begin.

"What?"

"Being stuck in that mainframe thing."

"Like....I don't know. I couldn't touch anything, feel anything.....the only thing I knew was that I wanted to get out."

"Sensory deprivation?"

"Something like that."

I find myself suppressing a shiver....now that can definitely drive you nuts.

"Jack....could I ask you something?"

She uses my name...not something I'm used to hearing from Carter. I've told her time and time again to call me Jack but she never does....not unless something is really wrong.

"Anything, you know that."

"Could you hold me for a while, just until I go to sleep."

"Sam....I shouldn't."

"I just....I just need to feel someone."

There are tears in her eyes again. I don't want to hurt her, but.....Her hand reaches out towards me, and against my better judgement I take it, hoping that no one comes in and sees us.

"Better?" I ask.

"Yes."

I sit there, just watching as her eyes close and her breathing slows. Even as she sleeps I don't release her hand. This is the problem, I know that once I touch her I can't let go.

"Colonel?"

The sound of General Hammond's voice is enough to make me drop Sam's hand. I struggle to attention, but he stops me,

"As you were Jack."

"I was just....Carter was having trouble sleeping and I...."

"It's all right, son."

He waves me back to my seat. I sit there, nervously playing with the buttons on my shirt, but I don't dare take Sam's hand again. Hammond walks over to the bed, laying a fatherly palm on her forehead. She barely stirs.

"How is she?" he asks.

"Doc says she just needs some rest," I answer.

"And you?"

"Tired, sir. But I'll be fine."

"This wasn't your fault, Jack."

That man is just too observant for his own good. It's like he knows exactly what's going through my mind. And it can be damn annoying at times. I can't hide this from him any longer. He knows that I lied to him....Sam is so much more than just another team member.

"Wasn't it? I put this whole base in jeopardy, sir because....because of the way I feel about Major Carter. It went into her because it thought I wouldn't retaliate," I snap back.

" Jack, you did the right thing, you made that difficult decision."

"Yeah....but what if I can't do it next time."

"Hopefully, there won't be one. Stay with Major Carter, Colonel.....and I'll make that an order if I have to."

"Yes, sir."

"And that favour I owe you....when you're ready you only have to ask."

Sam nearly died and my whole word started to fall apart. It scares me to know that I've put myself in a position where that could happen again. Yet I wouldn't give back the past four years...I wouldn't chose not to let this wonderful woman into my life. She stirs in her sleep, unconsciously reaching out to me again. This time I don't hesitate to touch her, winding her fingers in my own. Taking a chance I move closer to her and drop a chaste kiss onto her forehead, then her cheek and finally her lips. There is the whisper of a response, but she doesn't wake and I'm not sure I want her to. Every day we get closer to that point where I'm going to have to go to the General....but we're not there yet. Soon though....very soon.

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