Some Sweet Day
As Jack entered the bar he spotted Sam immediately, and became riveted to the spot, unable to move himself even to get to the bar. With eyes widened, mouth slightly agape, he watched her in shock and fascination. She was swaying her hips suggestively in thrall to the music, and moving her arms through the air in a sensual manner not normally associated with his 2IC. He gulped then tried to take in some air, totally astounded.
Were those leather pants? They hugged her frame so tightly he was amazed she could move in them. And that top? It was an extremely sexy close fitting see through number. Jack wished she wasn't wearing a camisole underneath, and then felt relieved. He would rather she didn't go around dressed like in front of other guys. He wanted her to keep it all for him. In his dreams... In any event, he thought it was just as well because his body was already responding in a way it shouldn't. It was an extremely unbecoming reaction for a CO to have about his second.
Control yourself, Jack, he admonished himself, realising that he must look a total jerk standing there like that. He sheepishly hoped nobody had noticed and, shaking himself out of it, went to the bar.
He hadn't even wanted to come here tonight but Daniel has talked him into it, against his better judgement. The SGC personnel had the bar all to themselves for a private Christmas party. Jack wasn't sure it was his thing, but Daniel had nagged him, until he agreed. He'd been pissed earlier and huffily told Daniel that he would be a no show, cursing himself that he'd mentioned it as soon as he saw the look on Daniel's face. Daniel had started a tirade about being anti-social, setting an example to the troops, keeping up staff morale, all that crap. In the end Jack could find no way to refute his argument. He knew he was going to lose this argument as soon as Daniel had opened his mouth. Daniel could do that, it was one of his more galling habits. Jack had just wanted a quiet night in with a pizza and a movie. He wasn't that good at Christmas anymore.
As he turned from the bar, looking over towards Sam again, he silently thanked Daniel for his persistence. She looked incredible and he definitely would have kicked his own ass all the way to Alaska for missing this. He didn't get to see her like this very often. In fact he struggled to remember if he ever had. This was not a Carter he knew, and that concept disturbed him slightly. He found it difficult to pull his eyes away, but as he did so he realised that he wasn't the only one in the room on whom she was having a similar effect. He cursed to himself, trying to bite back the jealousy that surfaced unbidden. Then it rose up again when he realised that she wasn't dancing alone. Who was that guy she was dancing with? He had his back turned, so Jack didn’t recognise him.
She's dancing with a guy! Not so bad in itself, maybe, but the very sexy and inviting way she danced with the guy? That consumed Jack, and his stomach did a back flip at the idea of Sam with someone else. He had no right to be jealous but, nonetheless, was. He felt that destructive monster fighting to get out of him and tried desperately to beat it back before he did something really stupid.
He wanted to go punch the guy in the nose; take hold of Sam and whisk her away so she was all his. Oh yeah, that would look really great coming from Sam's CO. Way to go Jack; how to end up at a court martial in one easy step. What a great Christmas present that would be. Besides, Sam would probably kill him, even if the guy didn't. She could lead her own life, make her own choices; it wasn't up to him, but he wished it was. He yearned for that more than ever.
He swore again as he wished he'd arrived earlier. Maybe it would have been him she was dancing with. Then he laughed to himself as he realised what a preposterous idea that was. Carter would never dance like that with him. That wasn't to say that he hadn't fantasised about her dancing like that in front of him, and only him - maybe once or twice. Besides, dancing like that wasn't really his style, he was more the slow and smoochy type. It dawned on him that he hadn't danced in a long time and thought about what it would be like to do that with Sam. God Jack, what are you thinking? Can't go there, it's far too risky.
As Jack thought about Sam and whoever the guy was, he took a quick look around the bar. It was festooned with Christmas decorations, which were totally over the top, and he grimaced, wondering how the hell he had ever spotted Carter so fast amongst at the glitz, glitter and balloons. Although he guessed he couldn't miss her; she was being pretty obvious in a very unlike Carter way. Seeing mistletoe all over the place, he wondered whether he could sneak a quick kiss from his 2IC.
Then, he spotted Daniel and Teal'c at a table closer to where she was dancing. Hoping they could distract him, he sat chatting inconsequentially for a short while, then lapsed into silence. All eyes at the table were on Sam, except for when Daniel and Teal'c sneaked a look at Jack, trying to gauge his reaction. It was something O'Neill had got very good at concealing over the years, his emotional turmoil. Having recovered from his initial shock, and despite the monster that lurked inside of him, he now looked impassive. Daniel and Teal'c both knew better but could only guess what was going on inside his head.
Daniel pondered when he first realised that Jack felt something special for Sam. It had taken forever for it to dawn on him then, when he looked back at the various events in their lives, he wondered how he'd been dumb enough not to notice before. Jack had done a pretty fine job of hiding it and treating her just like the rest of the team. Daniel knew that Jack cared about all of them, that he would die to save any of them. He thought that was partly why he hadn't noticed for a long time. He came to realise however, that Jack's feelings about Sam went way beyond just team mates and friendship.
He felt for Jack about this, knowing that any such thoughts and feelings were strictly forbidden to O'Neill and that acting on them was impossible. Daniel could never understand the military that way; their damned regulations and protocols. He suspected that Teal'c knew more than he was letting on, but Teal'c never said anything; it was not in his nature to do so. Daniel wondered, though, whether Jack had confided in Teal'c somehow. It hurt him a little to think that Jack might have done that with Teal'c but never with him.
Meanwhile, Teal'c also thought about his two friends. He had been present on the day that they had been coerced into a confession of feelings for one and other, but had knowledge of their mutual admiration for a long period previously to that. Teal'c was quiet but, because of this, observed a great deal. He knew that O'Neill was willing to make that sacrifice to defend his planet, and to help Teal'c free his people.
The sacrifice, of course, was to O'Neill's own happiness and well being; a life that he could lead outside of the SGC and his duty. It was O'Neill's sense of duty and honour that stopped him committing the thing that was probably an ultimate sin to him; taking any further steps to enhance his relationship with MajorCarter. This was something that Teal'c could relate to, respect and admire. It was part of the O'Neill character that had drawn the two of them together on Chulak.
Teal'c knew that, had he felt similarly about MajorCarter, he would happily, and very slowly, squeeze the life out of the man who currently danced with her. He suspected that O'Neill suffered feelings of a similar nature. MajorCarter did, indeed, look different tonight. Teal'c wondered whether she had gained the effect that she had been seeking by dressing and behaving this way.
Every so often, Jack could feel their eyes boring into him. He wondered what they were thinking. Did they actually believe he was going to get into that jealous rage and do something stupid? His heart still tempted him to do that - and it would certainly give Sam the shock of her life - but Jack was pretty sure that he wouldn't do something that dumb. He'd never behaved like that with Sara, but then he had never had any cause. He had no cause now. Sam was her own woman and didn't belong to him. No woman belonged to anyone. However, knowing this did not prevent his feelings of jealousy and possessiveness.
He wondered about this guy, though, and was debating whether Sam had bought a partner with her when he realised who it was. Lieutenant Wise? Who would have thought that geek had it in him? He laughed at the very concept of Carter and Wise as a couple, it was totally unthinkable. Son of a bitch, she was flirting. What was with her tonight, he wondered?
Sam had seen the colonel as soon as he'd walked in the door. She'd been waiting for him to arrive, relieved because Daniel had mentioned he was going to pull a no show. She was determined to get to dance with him tonight, even having planned which song she would ask the DJ to play for them. They'd never danced together before and, once the idea had popped into her head, she couldn't seem to shake it. She knew it was a little dangerous to allow herself to get that close to him but decided, nonetheless, she would take advantage of tonight. Maybe she could manage to get him under the mistletoe for a kiss. It was all part of her cunning plan.
She had carefully chosen her outfit, planned it to be a bit outrageous, dance wildly and sexily to get his attention. Only Sam Carter could plan such a thing with this kind of military precision. She wondered how pathetic and desperate that made her. No spontaneity for her, no siree. She made it appear spontaneous, but it was far from that. She even had to plan a flirtation with her CO down to the last detail. Crazy woman. Jack would probably find it hilarious.
So, she had seen him come in, his immediate stunned reaction to her, all the while pretending that she hadn't noticed him. His reaction pleased her and she wondered what was going through his head at that moment. Sometimes she thought mind reading would be a useful skill; but then she might learn something she didn't want to. As he sat with Daniel and Teal'c his expression had become unreadable and she suddenly speculated about whether he approved or disapproved of her clothes and non-Sam like behaviour.
She figured that he probably approved of her attire but not that she was wearing it here. He was probably enjoying the dancing too, although she'd be willing to bet that he would much prefer a private session. That idea made her laugh, and then the thought pulled her into a fantasy that she had to strive hard to escape from.
To pull herself out of it she imagined him glowering at her in disapproval. That was just as likely a scenario as the one that she had just painted. The thought occurred that he might think she was a little over the top. This idea appalled her, and she questioned why she had never considered it before. Screw him if that's what he thought, and she turned slightly to look him in the eyes and make her dancing even more provocative. Let him settle (or maybe even unsettle) a little; soon it would be time to make her move.
Daniel, meanwhile, had decided to break the silence.
"Why don't you go ask Sam to dance, Jack?" He asked, staring at Jack pointedly. The trouble with Daniel was that he would face things head on without thinking through the possible consequences.
Feigning ignorance, Jack just responded with a "Huh?" he didn’t even turn to look at Daniel.
"For God's sake, Jack, don't be so obtuse." At this Jack turned.
"Daniel, shut up, OK?"
Taking the hint from Jack's tone, for a change, Daniel merely exchanged glances with Teal'c, a slightly despairing look in his eyes. He could tell that Teal'c definitely knew more than he was letting on and he wondered how to get the big guy to open up. Probably no point even bothering to try, he thought, sighing sadly. Jack ignored them, turning back towards Sam. Despite the jealousy bubbling under the surface, he was determined to enjoy the view. He didn’t think there was any hope of ever seeing the like again.
Then she turned slightly and looked over directly into his eyes. It was as if she were dancing just for him. She smiled right at him and Jack felt a fire course through his body, and shivered. He could feel the heat in his groin and groaned softly to himself, then hoped that neither Daniel nor Teal'c had noticed, although could not bring himself to turn towards them to check. He smiled back at her, couldn't help himself. He felt himself loosing control. The witch must be hypnotising him or something. He was normally so good at control, in these circumstances at least, then he realised that this was a situation he had never before encountered.
Sam had bent to say something to Wise, then walked over to the DJ and spoke in his ear. It broke the spell for Jack and he turned to find both Daniel and Teal'c staring at him. They politely looked away again, Daniel with an innocent expression on his face that forced Jack to stifle a snigger. He didn't even see her coming, she was just there, standing by him at the table.
"Hey guys." She said as if to all of them, but she looked at Jack. "Dance, sir?" And she held out her hand to him.
Jack looked dumbly at her, not quite able to believe it, then he reached up, taking the proffered hand, and they walked towards the dance floor.
"So Carter , you do know how to have fun, after all?" Jack's smile mocked her slightly.
"Just dance colonel." Was all she said, and he took hold of her to do just that.
The DJ put on one of those numbers that could be danced fairly intimate and slow if that’s what you wanted. Jack and Sam both wanted. Jack quickly recognised it as an old Motown number from the late 60s; Diana Ross and the Supremes "Someday We'll Be Together". He remembered it well; he'd been young back then. Recalling Sam's little visit to the DJ, he realised that she had chosen this song for him, and it's significance. It was a message. His heart rate increased considerably.
"You're far away from me, my love
And just as sure, my, my baby,
As there are stars above,
I wanna say, wanna say, wanna say
(Someday, we'll be together)
Ah, yes we will, yes we will
(Someday) Some sweet day (we'll be together)
Oh, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know"
He held her gingerly at first, then pulled her closer. He could feel her breath on his neck, smell her perfume. It was a heady mix. Sam felt it too, his breath at her ear, his manly scent, and she moved herself even closer, holding him tightly. She could feel his body react as she swayed her hips and the thrill of it went right through her. Holding her head back she looked into his eyes, and he returned the gaze, desire writ large on his face. Jack knew that he was barely controlling himself but buried the urge to kiss her right there in front of the whole SGC. He tried to act normally, as if dancing with Sam was something he was used to doing every day, but wasn't sure he was succeeding in that.
"My love is yours, baby, oh, right from the start
You, you, you possess my soul now, honey
And I know, I know you own my heart
And I wanna say
(Someday) Some sweet day (we'll be together)
Oh, yes we will, yes we will
(Someday) Tell everybody now (we'll be together)
Oh, yes we will, yes we will"
"You look great tonight, Sam." He whispered, hoping that breaking the silence would relieve some of the tension. He knew that Sam couldn't have failed to notice his physical reaction towards her, it was pretty obvious. It was one of the pains about being a guy, there wasn't much you could hide when you were this close to a woman. Somehow, he wasn't either that embarrassed or ashamed by it, although he knew he should feel both. Reflecting that he had rarely been this physically close to her before, and certainly never this intimate unless you counted those times when they hadn't really been themselves, he felt exhilarated and elated. She just smiled at his words, nodding in acknowledgement.
Sam had spent hours choosing this outfit. She had bought the top only yesterday, while out shopping with Cassandra. Cassie had bet that she would never have the nerve to wear it to the SGC party. Little did Cassie know that Sam wanted it for precisely that purpose and had thought of the colonel when purchasing it; of what his reaction might be. It was a bet Sam had won easily.
"The top is… well… you know… nice…" Sam giggled at his expression as he said it. "But how the hell do you move in those pants?" At that she laughed outright, and he looked slightly perplexed. "Sorry about the side-arm by the way." He smiled thinly, a mock innocent expression on his face, and they both burst out laughing. Sam thought it was good to see him laugh. He didn't do that nearly enough; he was much better at making other people do it. They pulled closer together again then Sam stopped, right under the mistletoe; this was her chance.
Jack looked puzzled, and then noticed her looking up, then back into his eyes again. He smiled softly and pulled her into a kiss. Initially it was hesitant but he quickly got a little carried away with it. They pulled away from each other, slightly breathless, as the song drew to a close.
Jack thought that the three or four minutes it took for the song to play were far too short. Not wanting to end the moment, he pulled her towards an exit, ending up in the alley behind the bar. Sam had not planned for this and, although taken aback slightly, was as excited by the moment as he was. He moved closer to her, reaching to touch her face softly. She gasped, her eyes widened, and she leaned into his hand. Searching her eyes for an answer to the question that was in his own, and finding what he wanted, he took her into his arms once more, one hand at her back, the other cupping her face. The kiss started slow but quickly worked up to passionate. All the sexual tension that had grown between them over the years was trying to free itself in this moment.
Sam was returning both the embrace and the kiss with a fervour that matched Jack's own. Her hands caressed his back, then moved down towards his buttocks and thighs. Keeping one hand behind her head, his other moved to do likewise. The passion of the kiss took their breath away and they pulled their mouths apart to get some air, both flushed and panting. Jack could see from Sam's eyes that she desired him as much as he wanted her and he groaned deep inside his throat, his excitement rising. He pushed himself against her, backing her against the alley wall. Sam could feel his hardness pressing into her and she whimpered softly, pulling his mouth to hers again.
Jack's CO head was struggling to assert control and bring him back to reality, while his body was telling him to go further than he knew he should. This is wrong, he repeated to himself, and reality won. He started to pull away from her, realising that a hand had come to rest on one of her firm breasts, her nipple was taught and hard at his touch. He quickly removed it and stepped back, letting go of her. Sam made a noise that mirrored her frustration at his rejection. When he spoke his voice was laboured and hoarse. He also felt frustrated, but forced himself under control.
"God Sam, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have…"
"No. We…we shouldn't have. It's not just your fault."
Jack was so mortified that he had let himself get that carried away with her that he glanced down at his feet, unable to look her in the eyes. She moved towards him and reached her hand to touch his chin, tilting his face upward towards her. At her touch he felt something like an electrical charge run through him and he flinched away, and Sam's heart sank.
"Sam… don't… please. I... I can't…" He gestured helplessly, desperately struggling to maintain what little control he had managed to muster. As his heart beat rapidly, and his breathing laboured, Jack's whole body screamed at him to take hold of her again, to touch her skin, to make love with her. He wanted it right now, up against the alley wall - desperate, frustrated and desperate. He had never wanted it to be that way with her so he fought hard with himself. Even if it was right to do this, it wasn't right to do it like this.
"I think I'd better leave." He turned, too scared of what he might still do if he stayed. It was one of the toughest choices he ever made, deciding to leave her there. They couldn’t do this, he was her CO. They had already gone way over the boundaries that they had made for themselves, and that had been made for them.
"Jack, please don't, not like this." Sam pleaded, and her use of his name stopped him short, so unfamiliar was the sound of it on her lips. Turning back to her he saw that she had pulled herself together a little and was starting to face the same reality that he had already confronted. They were both normally such sensible and controlled people about this whole thing between them that he didn’t really understand how it had got so out of hand. He accepted, however, that they needed some sort of closure.
"I was deliberately provocative. I'm sorry." She laughed a little bitterly, adding "I bought this top with you in mind, you know that?" She couldn't imagine why she felt she had to tell him that.
Jack was surprised, and idiotically pleased, that she had admitted it, but merely said "Oh?"
She reddened slightly and thought how stupid it was to get embarrassed now, after what had just happened. They had come so close and she still felt the fire burning inside. But Jack was right. The colonel, she corrected herself, the colonel was right.
"I wanted to… wanted to…" She grimaced, trying to order her thoughts. "Wanted to see how you'd react."
Jack grunted and laughed regretfully. "Well, you did that all right. You should be careful what you wish for."
She smiled cheekily. "I thought you didn't like clichés." Wanting so much to touch him and feel his warmth, she nearly moved towards him but held back.
Jack looked amused by the comment but said nothing. He was thinking that his life seemed like one giant cliché. He wanted to tell he loved her, to hold her there with him forever. It was impossible.
"So, what happens now, Jack?" Sam remained outwardly calm despite her inner confusion. She was frantically trying to calm the heightened sexual feelings coursing through her. Crap! She hadn't realised quite how much she yearned for that. Jack had awoken a desire in her that had long been repressed and dormant.
"I don't know." He paused, also confused about where they now stood with each other. "Pretend this never happened? Carry on with business as usual?" He wondered how easy that would be. Hard, very hard.
Sam snorted. "Sweep it under the carpet, as usual? Keep it in the room?" As she remembered when she had first said that, she saw the recognition in Jack's eyes, and wondered what would have happened if she never had. Did he think the same thing?
"Something like that, yeah." He shrugged, a questioning expression on his face. He didn’t want it to be like that, but it was. Knowing that anything could happen and he could so easily lose her somewhere along the way saddened him. He didn’t want to regret that, but didn’t want to regret acting on his feelings either.
As if reading his mind she simply said. "It's OK, I'll wait." Forever if I have to Jack, ran through her mind.
"I can't ask you to do that… could never… It's not right for me to do that Sam, to have any expectations of you." As he spoke she moved over to him and put her hand on his lips to stop him. Again he felt a shock run through him and he grunted softly.
"I know." She said. "You don't have to ask. I'll do it anyway."
"Don't make promises you can't keep." Another god damned cliché. "Too much could happen. Things change. You can't give your whole life up for that small chance that we'll all live through this; that it'll end soon. I can't let you give that up."
"I'm not giving up my life for it, Jack. I'm just leading a different life until a new one comes along." His heart skipped a beat at that and she smiled warmly, brushing his cheek with her hand. It was his turn to whimper and he took her hand in his and kissed it gently.
"So… um… are we good?" Reluctantly adding, "Major?" A shadow of a smile came to his lips. It would be OK, they were going to get through this. His relief was palpable.
Sam nodded to him. "Yes sir."
Jack squeezed the hand he held, then let go reluctantly, escorting her back into the bar, the hand resting lightly at her back. Once inside they went in opposite directions, chatting to people along the way as if nothing untoward had just happened. Jack saw Daniel dancing with one of the nurses. He looked slightly drunk which probably meant he's had at least half a glass of beer. Jack smiled to himself thinking about when he's told Daniel that he was a cheaper date than his wife. It was a long time ago and much had changed since then. Daniel still couldn't hold his liquor, though, despite Jack's attempts to train him. He'd had a lot more luck with weaponry.
Teal'c was talking to General Hammond and Jack wondered when George had arrived. He was pretty sure that he hadn't been here when he'd left so abruptly with Sam. God, he hoped not. The whole base would probably be talking about it in the morning. Hell, they were probably all talking about it now. When he saw Daniel sit down again, he went over to sit with him.
"Hey, Danny boy, enjoying yourself?"
Daniel bristled but decided not to be provoked. Jack loved calling him that just to yank his chain.
"I’m OK. You? Where you been?"
"Oh, you know… Chatting to the lower ranks, keeping up morale, just like you said I should." Jack felt that wasn't really lying, he had been. For starters, his own morale had just had one hell of a boost. The bar was big and oddly shaped enough that he might just get away with fooling people that he'd been there the whole time.
Daniel narrowed his eyes, peering at Jack suspiciously. "Where's Sam?" He demanded.
"Oh, I don’t know Daniel, she's around here some place, I guess." He waved his arm to indicate the room. "Hey, there she is!" He pointed towards her, she had stopped by Teal'c and Hammond for a quick chat. He waved, and she waved back while Teal'c and Hammond both nodded at him.
Daniel wondered what had happened. He'd seen them dancing together and they'd looked pretty close from where he was sitting. That kiss was a doozy and he imagined he'd seen steam coming out of their ears. Then they'd both disappeared. Had they really been here somewhere all the time? He could take a pretty good guess at what they might have got up to, given how they'd looked together earlier. He shrugged it off. Nah!
While she and Hammond chatted amiably, Teal'c studied MajorCarter. There was something distinctly different about her that he could not quite place. He had observed, however, that she and O'Neill had left the bar earlier through the back exit, and he was not born recently. As he did not imagine that O'Neill or MajorCarter would break the vows they had made to defend their world, he was confident that nothing had occurred between them. Even so, she did look subtly different. When some people came over to talk to GeneralHammond, he and MajorCarter left and went to sit with the other two members of their team.
"Well, here we all are folks." Jack remarked jovially. "Together as always." He grinned broadly. "I really care about you guys, you know that?" He eyes drifted towards Sam as he said it. Both Daniel and Teal'c noticed. So did Sam and she felt her face go warm and become suffused with a blush.
At that moment, the DJ changed songs. This time it was Carole King's "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?", another blast from Jack's youthful past. He wondered whether they were doing it deliberately to make him feel old. Or were they just playing songs that seemed appropriate for him and Sam?
"Tonight you're mine, completely
You give your soul so sweetly
Tonight the light of love is in your eyes
But will you love me tomorrow?"
He didn't dare suggest dancing with her again, he couldn't put himself through that torture. So he caught her eye, smiled softly and winked. She inclined her head, returning the smile. She, too, would not dare make the suggestion again. So they both danced together in their heads while in reality they sat a few feet apart.
"I'd like to know if your love
Is a love I can be sure of
So tell me now and I won't ask again
Will you still love me tomorrow?"
Daniel stared open mouthed at Jack and Sam, who hardly took their eyes off each other for the duration of the song. It was clear that a message was being sent between them. Jack thought the song appropriate given what Sam had just said about waiting. The lust inside of him had not yet not fully abated, but he would handle it, and the hope for a future to come burned more brightly within him now. And he reflected that maybe Christmas would not seem so bad this year, after all. When the song finished he turned to Daniel.
"Daniel, thanks for making me come tonight." Daniel was a little surprised, and fiddled with his glasses nervously. Jack had just about the broadest, most genuine, grin on his face that Daniel had ever seen. Evidently, something had happened between Jack and Sam out on that dance floor, but he didn't think he'd be finding out any time soon. So he just smiled back.
"Yeah, sure you betchya, Jack."
Story Notes: Spoilers: Small references to Children of the Gods, Solitudes, and Divide & Conquer
My thanks are owed to Bonnie for all her comments, corrections and encouragement. Seasonal cheers to one and all.
Email: su.freund@blueyonder.co.uk
My thanks are owed to Bonnie for all her comments, corrections and encouragement. Seasonal cheers to one and all.
Email: su.freund@blueyonder.co.uk
End Notes: I'm not really a song fic writer but couldn't resist these. No doubt loads of you younger folks will be puzzled by these oldies, but they are perfect for Jack's era. Anyway, I don't actually think this counts as a proper song fic.
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]