Today their eldest daughter turns five. I’ve been there for each of her big events. I was there for her birth, her christening, her first day of preschool, all of it. Hell I’m Godmother to their son. I was there on their wedding day. He looked so happy on that day, I couldn’t blame him, and I couldn’t blame her. As much as I wanted to, I couldn’t. I couldn’t because we’re friends. I know you always say that you’ll stay friends after a break-up, but never do, well we did. And it’s days like these I have mixed emotions about that. I love the fact that I get to see his children grow up. He always made a great father, everyone knew that. On the other hand, it requires me to see them together. She makes him so happy he positively glows, so it must be right. However I can’t help but believe that it all went wrong somewhere. I can still remember the day he came to tell me he was going back to her. I was putting up a front of joy for his sake, while on the inside I lying on the ground in the fetal position. He was supposed to be mine. I can’t help but think that maybe if I hadn’t of loved from afar for quite so long. It was supposed to work out happily ever after for us. Sure we both had emotional baggage, but everyone does. I loved him, and he loved me, but he was IN love with her. He always was. I don’t think he ever truly was in love with ME. Everything was there, my father loved him, thought of him as a son actually, we had the same friends. We had everything, everything except mutual love and admiration. It was there, it was just all on my side. With her it was always there. I should have realized that I never had a chance. So now I sit in the house of one of her friends. They stand there in a group of people. He has him arm possessively around her waist, almost as if he can’t believe she loves him. He makes one of little comments about something, and she’s the only one to laugh. He probably told it just to make her smile. He used to tell his jokes for me to laugh, and to make me laugh, but now she’s the only one. I’m always on guard when they’re around, I’m so afraid of letting anyone see how I really feel. I’m happy where I am though. I have a place in their family. I’m not alone anymore, I’m a part of something. I have great friends around here. Who knows maybe one day I’ll learn to live again. For now, I’m content to be able to call Sam and Jack my friends. They’re so happy, it must be right. I guess he wasn’t supposed to be mine after all.