Black surrounded his mind as he followed the line of the barrel of his 9mm to the face of evil. The pale-faced man looked waveringly at his Executioner with the eye that wasn't swollen shut. His airman's uniform was ripped in places, covered in crimson in others, stained by his own sweat and fear. "I love her."
The Guilty's thin voice floated into the dark fog of the man standing solidly in front of him. Thick rage penetrated then dispersed the haze and he lowered the angle of his gun and squeezed delicately on the trigger, the shot and the Guilty's scream filled the room as the bullet tore through his kneecap. Head lolling and voice weak and panting the Guilty once again met the biting deep emptiness of his Executioner's gaze.
"She wouldn't come near me, turned me down and then avoided me. I saw you with her, I couldn't let you have her. She's at-" he grimaced and turned feverish eyes heavenward, "a better place now. She's waiting for me."
Another gunshot and corresponding cry of pain echoed around them. O'Neill raised the barrel to the airman's chest, carefully enunciating each word. "She's not waiting for you. You'll never go near her again you sick bastard.."
He precisely pulled the trigger halfway, letting out the last words to the dying. "You'll be in Hell."
**** Earlier-- ****
Jack whistled softly and less than tunefully as he made his way through the base. He'd caught up on the backlog of paperwork that had been taunting him in his office and he felt a little lighter for it, the feeling you get when something you've been dreading is over. As he got into the lift he glanced at his watch. 0100 hours. Carter'd definitely still be awake, most likely working in her lab. It wouldn't hurt to duck in and say hello, maybe convince her to get some sleep for once. He smiled, she worked so damn hard but she actually liked it. Her enthusiasm was one of the things that endeared her to everyone, and the Colonel was no exception.
He stepped from the lift as it reached lab level, lazily returning the salute of one of the airmen as he walked passed. Sure, convince Sam to take better care of herself...nothing to do with wanting to see her before he went to bed, no not at all. Nothing to do with their continually surprising relationship. The smile returned as he remembered yesterday's kiss. They were still so hesitant in themselves and confident in each other that the passion had taken him by surprise, he was pretty sure it had hit her as well. Sure they were going to take it slow but for once he found patience in himself. He *liked* the easy anticipation they were cultivating, and God did he feel young!
He rapped softly on her door, not wanting to startle her if she had some sensitive object in her hand or, worse, a welder or some such that she could throw at him when he disturbed one of her calculations. No answer. He peeked his head round the corner of her doorway, his eyes crinkling as he saw her seated at her desk, pen lying discarded next to her hand and maps of equations under her sleeping head. Trust her to work herself to exhaustion. He made his way over to her inert form, calling her name softly. No response. Jack reached his hand to touch her shoulder.
"Carter." He shook it slightly. "Yo Major!" Something was wrong, very wrong. He carefully lifted her torso away from the desk, and felt the world crash down around his ears. Vibrant crimson covered the carefully worked calculations, slashing across diagrams and colouring the wood underneath a morbid stain.
"Oh God..." Ignoring the intense nausea that spasmed inside him, he felt her throat, finding the artery but not the pulse.
"Sam!" He pulled her carefully off the chair, laying her on the ground and kneeling beside her. The front of her lab coat was obscenely tainted, the amount of blood loss incomprehensible. He yelled out for help as he checked her pulse again before leaning down starting CPR and heard a gasp behind him and then running footsteps and knew a medical team would be there soon.
"Come on Sam, fight it. Doc'll get here and she'll fix you up but you've got to work with me here." He stopped his movements and checked for breathing and pulse. Nothing.
"Dammit Carter, wake up! That's an order!" His vision blurred and he ignored it, grateful for the less intense red covering his hands and chest of the woman he loved. Grateful that he couldn't distinctly make out her face; the pale skin that uncannily remained untouched by the blood that surrounded them, the few strands of hair that always fell over her eyebrow just so, the shuttered blue eyes that held more life in them than any other pair he'd known.
"God Sam!" Janet's panic-struck voice sounded dischorded in the stillness. Jack felt himself being pushed away as the medics worked on the lifeless body. Blood ran with salt as he covered his face in his hands. Moments later Janet's words blew him away and Hell rose up to meet him.
"She's gone."
**** 1 Week later ****
The strains of a new song wound their way into his fog of depression. He unclenched the hand that had reached out for her as he relived the moment.
~~ My mouth fell open, hoping that the truth could not be true, refuse the news. I'm feeling sick now, what the fuck am I supposed to do, just lose and lose? ~~
Oh God he'd lost her, before he'd even had the chance to have her. *His* Sam. They'd finally figured it out, finally let go of the fear they'd both clenched tightly to keep them safe. But it wasn't enough, he'd walked out of that room with his life so obvious in it's awareness...undeniably aware of the encompassing lack of hers. He'd walked out of that room knowing he'd wasted too much time, wasted too much *life*, and that love could so easily be twisted into another word for pain. She would know now, how much he loved her. There's no way she'd leave the world without saying goodbye, even if he didn't hear it. She knew, had found out, had *felt* how very much he loved her. But now it was too late. He felt the coolness the breeze from the window left on his cheek and acknowledged the fact that it was caused by tears.
~~ Left on the floor, Leaving your body. When highs are the lows And lows are the way, So hard to say... Guess now you know I love you so ~~
Jack lifted his face into the breeze, blood throbbing like the bass of the music as his last moments with her replayed in his mind. The intense glare she had sent him as he'd made some remark about women doctors and then the spark of blue as she had exchanged glances with Janet before setting a dose of Carter-wit on him. The strands of blonde falling across her forehead as she laughed just before the elevator doors closed, her eyes meeting and catching his with a brief flare of heat before the cold grey metal cut off the contact. Her pale face shuttered and lifeless as his hands, covered in her blood, tried despairingly, frantically to revive her.
~~ You never knew this, but I wanted badly for you to Requite my love ~~
Dark coffin lowered into the damp ground, covered in irises because she hated the cliché of roses, and for the in-house joke of titanium flowers. A small angel as a head stone;
Samantha Carter A major, a doctor, the greatest of friends. The gate will be lonely without you.
To the world it was a reference to her passage into heaven, to the select group that had surrounded her grave it was a literal truth of classified proportions. The 'Gate, the Base, the worlds of friends all over the galaxy would mourn the loss of Major Sam Carter, USAF, but they would survive it. The world of one Colonel Jack O'Neill, USAF, wasn't too sure it could.
~~ Guess now you know I love you so. ~~
THE END
feedback. Go on, rant at me, I dare ya to tell me what you thought
Tearjerker by Sare
Story Notes: EMAIL: aquaresare@yahoo.com.au
SUMMARY: Tragedy strikes the SGC
RATING: M
SPOILERS: none
WARNING: major character death, coarse language, violence, sorry guys I don't know where this came from but I had to get it out. "Tearjerker" By the Red Hot Chili Peppers used without permission
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but this story and my Ford Laser. MGM and Double Secret own everything else. The chili peppers own the lyrics to 'Tearjerker'.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Okay so this is dark, even for me, not recommended if you're wanting to be chirpy for the rest of the day. Lyrics denoted by ~~. This is quite different from my usual style so please tell me what you think, criticism and flames included.
DEDICATION: For Nicole - they say evil begets evil, thanks for all the help
SUMMARY: Tragedy strikes the SGC
RATING: M
SPOILERS: none
WARNING: major character death, coarse language, violence, sorry guys I don't know where this came from but I had to get it out. "Tearjerker" By the Red Hot Chili Peppers used without permission
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but this story and my Ford Laser. MGM and Double Secret own everything else. The chili peppers own the lyrics to 'Tearjerker'.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Okay so this is dark, even for me, not recommended if you're wanting to be chirpy for the rest of the day. Lyrics denoted by ~~. This is quite different from my usual style so please tell me what you think, criticism and flames included.
DEDICATION: For Nicole - they say evil begets evil, thanks for all the help
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]