samandjack.net

Story Notes: You don't really need to watch the following, but I make reference to them. 'The First Commandment', 'The Broca Divide', 'Solitudes', 'Emancipation', 'In the Line of Duty', 'Tok'ra 1+2' or any episodes with Martouf in them, 'Serpents Song' and 'Message in a Bottle.'
I am a massive fan of Stargate Sg-1 and all the things that happen to them. It's a great show with great characters. Now, I'm writing a story about 2 of the best characters for a cool website. And a big thanks to my friend Natalie who unknowingly helped me write this. I would LOVE feeback.


Dear Diary,

You know, I feel pretty silly writing that. I'm not used to it, I mean when I was in school I didn't keep a diary. For one thing, I found it hard to express my feelings to people and especially a peice of paper. Now that I'm a member of SG-1 I have to be careful of my feelings, but that doesn't change a simple fact. I love Jack O'Neill. It's almost a crime to think about it, I mean, even if he did feel the same way about me, there could never be anything between us. For starters it would split up SG-1, and I would never want that to happen.

I guess I always knew that I loved him, but I didn't realise it until only recently. Looking back over the past missions I realise that I have flirted with him emensly, and, well, tried to get him to notice me. I also tried to be 'one of the guys' which is probably why he never notices me. I'm probably not the kind of woman that he'd like anyway, we tend to disagree on certain things that would probably end our relationship if we ever had one. I really don't know why I even feel like this. I haven't had a serios relationship since I gave the ring back to Jonas which might be the reason. I really don't know.

I'm pretty sure a few people have realised that I'm flirting with Jack because I get weird looks from Daniel, Teal'c and Janet whenever Jack and I are in the same room. And for some reason I don't think that Jack has looked at me the same way since we got infected by the disease from the planet of Light and Dark. I mean I apologised for my behaviour and all, but I don't think he listened. It wouldn't be the first time though. Like when we came throught the second Earth stargate, I know he was hurt and all, but he could've tried to listen at least.

Memories from past missions keep coming into my mind now and its getting hard to concentrate. Like I said before how I'm always trying to be 'one of the guys', I seemed to prove that fact when I fought for the freedom of a teenage girl, her name slips my mind at the moment, who was to be killed by her phsyco father and I won. I guess the thought of proving that I was more than 'just a girl' to Jack helped me win that fight. And when we met the Nox and the young Nox came up to me Jack said, I can still remember the exact words, "No, you can't keep him." Sure Jack can be extremely sarcastic at times. That could be why I love him.

I also remember when Jolinar had used me as a host, and I begged him to kill me. Believe me when I say that I'm grateful that he didn't, but there was something in his voice when he said it. He was upset. Maybe I was hallucinating, only hearing what I wanted to hear, but I am so sure that it was there. One time I thought I saw jealously on Jack's face was and still is whenever I am with Martouf. Maybe I'm hallucinating again but I swear I saw the same expression on Daniel's face as well.

But there are times when Jack scares me as well. When we came through the second Earth stargate he was certain that he was going to die in Anarctica after a while. And when he was interrogating Apophis when we captured him. I was scared for hime when the orb that we brought back pinned him to the wall by his shoulder. There were plenty of times when I knew that all Jack wanted to do to Colonel Maybourne was kill him. But even I knew that Col. Maybourne deserved it.

I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. What am I doing? I remember writing that in my school diary over my highs school crush. I love him. I love...



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I was jolted back to reality by a knock on my door.

"It's open." I called out. The door opened, and Daniel looked in. He was dressed in mufti like I was.

"Sam, you ready to go?" he asked. We were going to Jack's house to enjoy some downtime. Jack's house.

"Yeah, just a sec." I replied as I grabbed my coat and walked out the door with Daniel. Tonight, I thought. Tonight I'll tell Jack how I feel about him. Tonight.



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