Don't Know Much by Venom

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Story Notes: Hate is Such a Strong Word 02: Season/sequel: The Lucky Ones

Author's notes: For Linz, Cause She asked. For Jem, who always knows what to say. And trisha, who is patient!

Feedback: Hell yeah! Don't make me beg, hit reply and stroke my ego please.

Dedication: As always, for LEW.

Date: 08/01/2005

Copyright © to Venom, 2005

***

I don't know much
But I know I love you
And that may be all there is to know

***

Jack was damn sure that his girlfriend –snicker- was still pretty pissed at him.

Because really, it was completely his fault that the Asguard were now prepared to sign an updated formal treaty. So really, it was completely his fault that she had to wear her Dress Blues, which by default made it his fault that she had to wear heels. And they made her legs look fat, apparently.

Personally, he didn't see it.

But, nevertheless, he was being extra vigilant in keep the toilet seat down, laundry was put in the assigned hampers (one for lights one for darks), all of his bodily functions were kept well away from her. The grass was cut every Sunday morning, the washing up done twice a day, he shaved every second day. There was never a risk for her to get stubble rash.

But, apparently, he was still an ass.

Go figure.

"I hate you."

He was trying to be supportive. He really was. "I know you do honey."

"I want to gauge your eyes out with a fork and serve them to Thor." It really- truly- scared him that she was able to smile and nod and look polite to all of the important people while she informed him of how slow and painful his death would be. And apparently, it would be very slow and very painful. Because he was an ass. Because he knocked her up.

He refrained, on a daily basis, from telling her that it takes two to Tango.

The day she's told him about the baby, he though that it was just the hormones making her hate him. He, stupidly, thought that is was a phase. Doctor Brightman said it was just a phase. Everyone said it was a 'phase.'

Longest bloody phase Jack's ever seen, that's for sure.

"I'm serious Jack, I will kill you."

"I know."

"It's going to be slow."

"I expect nothing less.

"And very painful."

"I figured."

"Are you even listening to me?" Jack suspected that the only thing stopping her from throwing her drink in his face was the fact that there were twenty Asguard surrounding them. If it had just been the SGC personnel, he had no doubts that he would be wearing some lovely scented fruit punch by now.

"Of course I am."

"You get that I hate you right, you understand that?"

She told him at least twice a day, he wasn't *that* thick. "Yes Sam. I get that you hate me. I get that you want to castrate me with a butter knife. I get that you never want me to touch you again and I get that I'm an ass."

He wasn't completely sure, but she almost looked a little bit sorry for the way she'd been acting. Almost. "Well, as long as you get it. Excuse me, I'm going to talk to Thor."

Jack felt so guilty for the fact that he was glad she was gone.

But then, as he watcher her walk away, she bent over to pick something up for one of the Asguard. "Damn I love that ass." Hearing someone clear his throat behind him, Jack turned around and cringed. Jacob and George were looking at him with expectant expressions, eyes brows raised. "Ah…George? Did I just say that out loud?"

The General grinned. "Yes son, you did."

Jack coughed nervously. "And there you have it. The reason Sam thinks I'm an ass."

Patting a reassuring hand on the younger man's back, Jacob smiled. "Don't feel too bad, Sam's mother was the same when she was pregnant."

For some reason, that didn't really make Jack feel any better. "It's gonna be like this for the next four months, isn't it?"

"Not necessarily."

"You didn't hear her with the thing about the spoon?"

Jacob's smile widened, if possible. "Yes I did. But she's standing in the corner over there gesturing for me to send you over."

He couldn't help but cringing, feeling as though Jacob was sending him to his death as he walked towards his pregnant, but still very hot, girlfriend. Snicker. "You wanted to see me?"

"Yeah."

"Can I save you some time?"

"Uh… ok?"

Taking a deep breath, Jack started to recite the all too familiar words. "I'm an ass. It's my fault that you're pregnant and you're going to kill me. And you're going to do it slowly and it will be very, very pai-" He was cut off as she reached up and brushed her lips against his.

This kiss was everything that her demeanor hadn't been for months. Gentle, loving, a caress.

She pulled back and smiled at him. "I love you."

"I love you too."

"Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"You put words in my mouth again and I'm going to kick your ass."

He could so live with that.

***

End Notes: NO! No sequel. This is not a Trilogy. I said no, damnit!

=====

Cheers, Venom

http://loveandwar-tv.tripod.com/index.html
http://www.livejournal.com/users/venom69/

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