A New Start
Sam stopped, looking up at the moon shinning brightly only to see it quickly covered by the clouds. She thought back about when she was young and wanted to be an astronaut traveling to the moon and outer space. But that was then and now she's traveling clear across the galaxy to other moons and other planets faster than she had ever imagined possible when she was young.
Well she was no longer young and right now she felt older than she had in a long time especially after her visit this afternoon. Cindy, an old college buddy had called advising that she was in town and wanted to visit. She showed Sam an assortment of pictures ranging from pictures of her children, husband, and other classmates from college and their families. She complimented Sam on having the fortitude to remain with the Air Force and most of all for being free of Jonas Hanson. Sam looked over at Cindy and with a grimace on her face she said that Jonas was dead. Cindy apologized to Sam and asked her what happened. Sam said that all she knows was that he died on a mission. Cindy asked why there wasn't a line of men waiting outside of Sam's door to take her out. Sam said that she just hasn't had much luck with men and work occupied most of her time.
Sam looked back up at the moon to see that the clouds that had been covering it for the last twenty minutes had now moved away allowing the moon to shine brightly again. She felt old. Her old college friends had gotten married and some divorced but all of them had some sort of family life but not her. Her family apart from her estranged brother and father consisted of her co-workers. They were all very special to her but she didn't have anyone special in her life, no one that she went home to after a hard mission that could comfort her. She wanted to tell Cindy that there was someone special in her life but unfortunately because of regulations they couldn't be together.
Sam looked up at the sky again thankful that she could see the sky, remembering back to the time when they were beneath the surface with their memory stamped. Even with the memory stamp she was attracted to him and him to her. They started getting closer together beneath the surface and probably would have acted on their feelings for one another if they would have remained but fate stepped in. Brenna had called them to her office and advised them of who they really were. Although she was glad to get her memory back she wondered what might have happened if their memory hadn't returned. She continued her walk through the park lit by the moonlight.
She needed the fresh air because she had been thinking of him and after their last mission she wondered how she could be attracted to such a cold hearted person. She knew that Five would never have done anything to harm them and just maybe they might have had an opportunity to defeat the Replicators but he would not allow it. Why couldn't he see that Five was different from the others and leaving him behind with the rest of the Replicators was a bad decision. But he was her commanding officer and she had to follow his orders. Sam was walking to her front door when she heard the sound of a large engine idling. She looked around and noticed a familiar truck down the street. She was angry that he was checking up on her, she wasn't a poor helpless lady; she knew hand to hand combat and could probably kick his ass, okay maybe not kick his ass but at least give him a good fight. Once inside she turned off the porch light deciding to talk with him at work tomorrow. The porch light went off as he drove by assuring him she was safely inside her residence. Jack had spent the majority of his down time at the cabin thinking about how to apologize for being so curt with Carter concerning that Five guy. But he made a decision and felt it was the only way to ensure their safety as well as the safety of the Asgards. As he drove past her house he decided he would talk with her tomorrow at work.
However, things did not go as he had planned the next day, but then again when do they ever go as planned, but he never would have foreseen what had happened. He was placed under arrest for the murder of Senator Kinsey. Every one was working so hard to try and clear his name, the opportunity to talk with Carter never came about, not that she was very receptive during this time.
After clearing Jack's name, Sam hoped that she would be able to talk with Jack concerning the Replicators but once again fate intervened and Maybourne was again in their lives. This time he was touting about him knowing about some cache of weapons they could use against the Goa'uld. The mission to find the weapons turned out to be one of Sam's worse missions. Maybourne had overpowered her, taking her Zat gun and zatting her and Colonel O'Neill. She woke up in time to see the Colonel and Maybourne go through the barrier then disappeared. He was gone; Colonel O'Neill was no where to be found on the planet and she had no idea where was.
Her heart began to ache, she had failed him. She sat alone in the women's locker room sadden by the loss. Sure she was sad when Daniel had ascended but this was different, it was Jack and he was gone. If she had been a better soldier, better prepared, fought harder with Maybourne; then none of this wouldn't happen or so she thought. She had lost him she thought as the tears started to fall from her eyes. The door to the locker room opened and Teal'c spoke with her. He knew about the feelings between her and the Colonel but being a man of honor he would never betray their feelings for one another to anyone. She told him about feeling all alone because they had just lost Daniel and now the Colonel. He held Sam as she cried allowing her to release her pent up feelings.
As luck would have it, she was able to discover where the Colonel was transported and forwarded the information to the Tok'ra who rescued the Colonel. He returned home alone, stating that Maybourne had died on the planet instead of telling them the truth. Sam attempted to talk with the Colonel but everyone was surrounding him and welcoming him back. He was given time off for his leg to heal and she figured it would be a good time to apologize. Yet when she apologized he told her to forget about it because there was nothing to apologize for. She couldn't believe it, he was sloughing off her apology, why did he do that? Didn't he realize how upset she was because she was inadvertently to blame for his being lost with Maybourne? Instead all he did was thank her once again for getting him home stating that he never gave up hope, then he changed the subject. He was sent home and she figured it would be a better time to express how sorry she was for letting him down and maybe away from the SGC he would understand how much this latest episode upset her.
Unfortunately Jack was in a great deal of pain when Carter stopped by and was tired with her constant apologizing and decided to put a stop to this. He told Carter to stop apologizing and if she wanted to blame herself for what had happened then to go right on doing it because he didn't blame her for anything except giving him a headache to go along with the pain in his leg. He told her it would be best if she left before he said anything to upset her. She started to apologize again for upsetting him when he lashed out, stating if she wanted to have a pity party about her actions then go have it at her house because as far as he was concerned the matter was over and slammed the door close.
She could not believe it, she had been trying to apologize to Jack and he threw her out of the house. Didn't he know how much it meant to her to have him back and why didn't he see how much he meant to her. She didn't understand why he was pushing her away. When he slammed the door in her face, Sam decided that if the Colonel was going to push her away then away was where she would go. She was tired of pining away for him and pushing herself to the limit for him. It was time for a change.
Sam took a look in the mirror and was happy with what she saw, she looked very feminine which was just what she wanted. She was about to go out the door when the phone rang. She figured that it was Janet stating that she was going to late but instead it was the Colonel. She could not believe what he was doing; he was inviting her at the last minute to join him, Teal'c and Jonas for a night of pizza and movies, stating they even got a chick flick for her to watch. He must think she didn't have a life, well she didn't but she wasn't going to admit it to him. She stated he caught her just as she was leaving. He asked her what could be more important than coming by and checking on her sickly commanding officer. Sam smiled sweetly as she thanked the Colonel for his last minute invitation but said that she had a date this evening and needed to go. All she heard was silence on the other end of the line as she hung up the phone. The phone rang a few moments later, it was Janet canceling her night out with Sam. Instead canceling her plans of a night out on the town and going to the Colonel's for movies and pizza, Sam decided to go out anyway. She wasn't at the Colonel's beck and call and now was a good time for a fresh start on getting a life outside of work.
Sam slipped off her shoes on the drive home; she'd forgotten how punishing high heeled shoes could be especially when dancing so much, besides they weren't easy to move in if she had to defend herself. She knew if she would have stayed any longer at the club she would have hurt some of the guys because they wanted to get a bit too familiar with her and her body parts. Bars use to meat markets but now they were farmer's market where everyone thought they had the right to sniff and squeeze the merchandise. Sam walked into her house more exhausted from an evening out than any mission she had been on; it was rough always having to be on guard and no one to watch your six. Sam realized that trying to go out and pick up a guy was not the answer to her problem; she had to face her problem head on. She turned on her computer and started searching through her discs to find the article she had copied a couple of years ago. She printed the article and then printed up a certain part of military regulations before shutting down her system and getting ready for bed. She knew that she was going to need a good night's sleep for what she was planning to do tomorrow. She looked at the time and realized that it was already tomorrow. She needed some rest so she could anticipate what might happen later today.
When Sam woke up she knew that this was going to be a special day; no it was going to be greater than that. Today was going to be the start of a new life one way or another. She spent the morning planning her afternoon; she wasn't going to leave anything up to chance. She took one last look in the mirror to make sure she looked okay before she confronted him.
Sam knocked on his front door and could hear him grumbling as he walked to the front door. He opened the door and seemed rather surprised to see her there. She asked if she could come in and he moved aside to let her in. Sam made a point of putting a little bit more sway in her walk as she walked into the living room, hoping that this would soften his sour disposition.
In the living room Jack apologized for his harsh words the other day but was cut short by Sam stating it was her turn to talk. Sam said the reason she had been apologizing so much was because her actions demonstrated showed she wasn't a good soldier. Jack interrupted stating it could have happened to anyone. Sam said that may be so but it wasn't anyone it happened to, it was her and because of it the man she cared for had vanished and that upset her. Jack was taken back by her comment and knew where this conversation was going. He had to take control of things before anything happened between them. As he watched her talking he could feel his resistance fading. Heck his torture in the Middle East and by Ba'al were only physical and didn't hurt as much as the torture in his heart when it came to his second in command. Jack told Sam she shouldn't waste her time thinking about him as big as a compliment as it was to his ego but instead should find someone better suited to her. Sam said there were men who were interested in her but all of them seemed to have the nasty habit of dying. Then with a smile on her face she said all of the men she has cared for have died and were no longer in her life except for one. She said that he did die but he came back and was still in her life so he is best suited for her.
Jack reminded Sam about USAF regulations about fraternization and was surprised to see her smiling. Sam withdrew some papers from her purse and handed them to Jack. The first papers that Jack read were the actual fraternization regulations along with a teaching example of these regulations from a USAF site:
FACTS: Lt Col X, single and in command of maintenance squadron, meets Captain Y, a recently divorced pilot. They discover they have many common interests, including skiing. After dating off and on, they plan to spend a Saturday at the mountains taking skiing lessons together. The flying wing is short of pilots and there have been complaints about the high ops tempo. On Friday, Captain Y is notified of a short-notice weekend mission. Capt Y calls Lt Col X and says, "I'd really rather go skiing but I've been assigned to a mission. Unless you can talk my commander out of this, the trip is off." Lt Col X immediately calls Captain Y's commander, an old acquaintance, and makes a case for changing Captain Y's schedule. Captain Y's commander "blows up" at the suggestion and his rather loud conversation with Lt Col X is overheard by others. The story quickly spreads throughout the squadron.
DISCUSSION: The initial relationship between Lt Col X and Captain Y does not violate the policy on professional relationships. The policy allows dating between officers and dating between enlisted members, unless the relationship results in or reasonably creates the appearance of favoritism, misuse of office or position, or the abandonment of organizational goals for personal interests. Up to the point of the ski trip, there is no evidence of factors that might cause the relationship to be unprofessional. When Capt Y suggests that Lt Col X exert influence on Capt Y's commander and Lt Col X does so, both have abandoned organizational goals for their personal interests and the relationship has taken on an unprofessional aspect. Capt Y's commander quite properly rejected the attempt to influence his decision.
Sam then handed Jack an article copied from a newspaper that almost mirrored the example he read. The article was concerning a Wing Commander and an Intelligence Officer assigned to the same base who were both single. The article advised that they were charged with fraternization. The article mentioned the two officers were observed sitting next to each other at an off duty squadron party at the beach and had held hands on occasion but nothing else. One of the culminating events was when the Wing Commander and the Intelligence officer both asked for the same time off, each mentioning that they were going skiing. As Jack read this he remembered in the teaching example the female asked the Lt. Colonel to intercede when she was denied time off but that was not what happened in this case. The charge of fraternization was summarily dismissed against the officers as fraternization could not be proved. The only open display of attraction between the two officers had occurred during a beach party where the two were seen holding hands and sitting close together off duty. The two officers maintained a professional level at work with no further open displays of affection towards each other on or off duty or away from the base. When they were off duty they were not seen together and there was no proof of their relationship. The two officers separately asked for time off during the same period with each stating they were going skiing but didn't state who with. The USAF determined that since there was no break down in the chain of command, no open displays of affection between the two, no acts of favoritism displayed by the Wing Commander to the Intelligence officer, and neither officer had ever revealed the name of the person they were seeing off base and off duty, the charge of fraternization were dismissed. Jack read over the parts Sam had highlighted, involving maintain professionalism, no proof of favoritism, no inappropriate actions and maintaining the privacy of their life off duty, so the charge was dismissed.
Jack put the papers on the coffee table trying not to jump to conclusions why Sam had him read the papers. He looked at Sam stating he read them and asked her why she gave him the papers. Sam looked surprised at Jack and asked him if was playing dumb or was he so thick he needed a ton of bricks to hit him on the head. Sam noticed the look of confusion on Jack's face and moved next to him on the sofa. She faced him then leaned in kissing him soundly on the lips. He was startled at first by her actions but soon lost track of things and started kissing her back. Suddenly he stopped easing her arm's length away from him. He apologized and said as much as he liked this, it was wrong. Sam asked why it was wrong and Jack said, "regulations" and it could destroy her career.
Sam looked at him asking him if he read the articles or not. He said he read them and told her that they were different. Sam asked him how they were different, advising that they usually had time downtime at the same time, they've proved that they can maintain their professionalism at work and they certainly can keep a secret because of their job. Jack slowly shook his head and said that it wouldn't work because he would just end up hurting her and he didn't want to hurt her or jeopardize her career, he couldn't risk that.
Tears filled her eyes as Sam stated he was hurting her now as she leaned on him placing her head in the crook of his neck. She said this last mission brought things into perspective for her. Their jobs placed their lives at risk all of the time and she could handle that but what she couldn't handle was risking loosing him without ever having the chance to explore their feelings for one another. She said the men she's liked have the nasty habit of dying and leaving her all alone. Jack started to say something but Sam interrupted stating they were destined to be together. He said he thought she didn't believe in destiny. Sam looked at him saying she didn't before she started going through the Stargate but since they've had contact with alternate universes, she began to believe in destiny. She said some things were inevitable like they're being together. She asked him not to hurt her by turning away from her. Jack looked at Sam asking if she was sure about this. She smiled saying she's never been so sure of anything before in her life. Jack leaned into Sam, kissing her soundly and pulling her closer to him. It was a new start to their lives together, as a couple.
Jonas and Teal'c noticed the change in Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter, they were more professional on missions and on base. Yet there was something in their eyes when they looked at each other, something more expressive than words seem to pass between them. Janet had also noticed a change in Sam; she was smiling more and seemed to be happier. Janet asked Sam if there was a new man in her life and Sam said there was most definitely a new man in her life. Janet looked shocked by Sam's words and asked Sam for details. Sam stood up, smiling ever bigger and walked out of the infirmary without saying anything else. Janet would periodically question Sam about this new man but stopped when Sam spotted Janet and Jonas shopping together in the mall. Janet seemed a bit embarrassed and Sam smiled, rapping Jonas on arm stating she knew he could ask someone out without having a friend ask for him.
When Daniel Jackson descended things changed very rapidly with the team doing their best to battle against Anubis and save Jonas' home planet. Then it happened, Jonas was asked to return to his world and be the representative for the Kelowans which he reluctantly did, leaving behind his new friends and someone very special to him. He was a duty bound person and so he returned to his home world to help establish peace amongst the inhabitants at a great personal loss. Sam noticed how Jonas hesitated a moment looking around the gate room with a hint of sadness in his eyes as he hugged her good-bye. She knew why there was so much sadness in his eyes, her best friend was not there to see Jonas leave. But something deep inside Sam sensed that someday Jonas Quinn would return to Earth and maybe then he and Janet would have a chance to further their relationship.
The team continued their missions through the Stargate with the new Presidential administration and managed to stay together despite a certain person trying to take control of the project. However the Stargate project was not the only thing to continue, Sam and Jack's relationship seemed to strengthen. Sam considered the times she and Jack together to be the best times of her life. Her love for him grew as did his for her. The only thing that might have made their relationship better would have been if the fraternization regulation was repealed but there was no chance of that ever happening so they maintained their secret relationship.
It was a typical mission that soon went wrong. Ba'al and his Jaffa warriors decided to visit a planet SG-1 was exploring at the same time. Soon SG-1 was under fire and having to fight their way back to the gate. When the Stargate was in sight the team increased their speed towards it, knowing they could flee to the safety of the SGC. Sam was laying down cover fire by the gate while Daniel dialed home when she saw the Colonel fall when hit by a staff blast. Panic set in and she wanted to run to him but she remained at her post until Daniel sent the code. Daniel shouted he sent the code then Sam told him to go through and alert the medical staff. As he ran through the wormhole she ran to where she had seen the Colonel fall. As she got closer to him several Jaffa warriors closed in on her. She saw Jack laying face down and not moving and fear overtook her. She knelt down and fired her P-90 at the approaching warriors mowing them down, making sure that they died for what they did to Jack. Her clip was empty and she quickly reloaded and was ready so when the next band of warriors approached she fired at them shouting at them to die as she fired at them. She reloaded another clip and continued to fire at the dying Jaffas until Teal'c stopped her.
Sam turned her attention to Jack calling him by his first name. Slowly he turned over grimacing in pain and clutching his side here he had been hit but apparently the blunt of the blast had struck his vest. The Colonel ordered them to go through the gate and to bring reinforcements. Sam shook her head and started to try and lift Jack up only to hear him tell her to stop. She looked at his face and saw that he was in great pain. Jack told Teal'c he was ordering him to take Major Carter through the Stargate and that he would find a place to hide until they returned with reinforcements and a stretcher for him. Sam shouted no and Jack looked to Teal'c stating it was an order and for him to do it now before the Stargate shut down. Sam hesitated then saw Jack nod his head and knew he had given her an order that had to be followed. Reluctantly she left him lying there in pain and set up a ruse to distract the Jaffa away from the Colonel then fled to the Stargate. They had reached the gate when an overwhelming surge of anger rose up in her as she saw warriors close to where they left Jack and she started firing fiercely at those warriors, getting them to come after her and Teal'c. As they approached gate the firefight became more intense and at the last minute she stepped into the wormhole. Once at the SGC she yelled for them to close the Iris. The sound of the Iris sealing itself was one of the worse sounds she had heard in a long time.
She quickly controlled her fear and made a request to General Hammond to go back with reinforcements to rescue Colonel O'Neill. The General advised that he wouldn't send a rescue mission through until he could be assured that they weren't sending them into harm's way. She knew he was right in his decision but that didn't make it any easier on her already aching heart. She cleaned up then prepared a briefing for the teams who were to accompany SG-1 back to the planet on a rescue mission. Teal'c watched her as she carefully controlled her feelings in front of the teams. He followed her as she walked into the ladies locker room knowing that she needed to be alone so he stood guard discouraging anyone from interrupting Major Carter at this time.
Finally after four hours of waiting a rescue mission was dispatched to retrieve Colonel O'Neill only she wasn't sure what condition he would be in because of his injury. On the planet an hour had passed with no sign of Colonel O'Neill. Teal'c had tracked the Colonel for that hour but lost his trail which he thought was rather odd since the Colonel had been injured and it would have been difficult for him to move. They continued to search the planet but by the third hour the rescue team was preparing to call it quits but Sam would not let them. The rescue teams stated they believed that Colonel O'Neill had been taken by Ba'al. Sam turned to them with anger evident on her face telling them they were going to continue looking until they found Colonel O'Neill and that was a direct order since she was the leader of this rescue mission.
The sun was getting lower in the sky and they were loosing the light. Sam looked around and spotted some caves less than one klick away. Something told her that if Jack was still here he would have tried to take refuge in the caves and make a stand from there since it would provide him a vantage point and some shelter. Sam took only a few people with her while the others continued to search the surrounding area of the caves. She was still retaining hope of finding him but as she searched each cave her hope began to wane. Fifty feet inside the fifth cave she was searching she wondered if the other teams might be right about Ba'al taking Jack with them.
She sat down on a large rock inside the cave and when a feeling of overwhelming sadness came over her. She had lost the man she loved, who completed her. She began to cry unable to hold back her feelings any longer.
In between her sobs she heard something and shinned her flashlight around trying to see where the sound came from. Then she heard it again, it was very soft but she distinctly heard her name being said. There up against the wall of the cave partially hidden was Jack. She rushed to his side checking his wound and noticed mud packed around the wound acting as a type of bandage. She checked his vitals and saw that he was weak and needed medical help. She immediately notified the team over the radio that she had found him and they replied they would be there in 10-15 minutes. Jack then called out to Sam and motioned for her to come closer. He smiled at her and said he knew that she would come for him then slumped over. When the rescue team entered her cave they heard Sam telling the Colonel to hang on, help was here.
When Jack woke up he immediately recognized the ceiling tile and walls of the infirmary. He spotted her sitting by his bedside and seeing her there made him feel good. He cleared his throat but she remained asleep. Dr. Fraiser walked by and noticed him awake. She walked to his bed, checked his vitals and said he should rest. Dr. Fraiser looked over at Sam then to Jack stating the team has been taking turns sitting with him but Sam had been there longer than the others. Jack knew where Dr. Fraiser was going with this comment so he said he was tired and going back to sleep and to tell his team to get some rest. Janet smiled, stating that she would do that as he nodded off to sleep again. She then looked at Sam noticing she was touching Jack's hand and she knew that there was still something between these two. No matter who the new man in Sam's life was now, he would only be a substitute for Sam's commanding officer.
Life continued as normally could be expected for personnel working in the Stargate project which meant that at any given time anything and everything could go right or wrong. Unfortunately for SG-1 they would be on the receiving end of things not going their way. For several months they would end up gating to a world that either wanted nothing to do with them or were hostile towards outsiders.
Then it happened, things got out of hand on a planet SG-1 was visiting and the team was attacked. As they were racing towards the Stargate Sam was struck by an arrow. She felt it the moment it hit her but there was something different, her field of vision was rapidly decreasing and her leg was numb. She heard the attackers getting closer and could barely make out the shape of the Colonel and Teal'c at her side. She told them to go or they would be captured. She felt his arms go around her and she told him to leave her, she was dying. She could just make out the image of the Colonel shaking his head stating, "No one gets left behind".
Sam opened her eyes to see face of her father in the infirmary. Sam asked what happened. Jacob said he was visiting when the gate activated and Colonel O'Neill came through the gate with her in his arms. Jacob said the arrow that struck her had some type of toxic poison and she was barely alive when the Colonel brought her back. Jacob said he used the healing device several times on her and he's glad to see she's much better now. Sam thanked her father saying that she was still a little tired. He smiled at her, caressing her face in his hand telling her to sleep.
Janet watched Jacob leave the infirmary only to be besieged by Sam's team members inquiring about her condition. Jacob gave them the good news and they walked down the corridor. Janet looked again at the test results making a mental note to talk to Sam when she was feeling better and in private concerning the test results. What she saw in the tests was a sign as to why it was taking Sam longer to recover from this injury compared to other injuries she had received. But now was not the time to talk about and she decided that it could wait.
After several days Sam left the infirmary for home where her father stayed looking over her and making sure his little girl was okay. Jacob stayed for a few days then left once he was assured his daughter would be taken care of by her team members. During one of their get well visits Jack mentioned that he was going up to his cabin and invited the team to join him. Teal'c and Daniel both quickly came up with excuses of pending work that needed their immediate attention. Jack turned to Sam stating fishing was good therapy. Sam smiled saying as tempting as it was, she was going to take this time and go visit her brother. The trio all smiled at one another because they had managed to avoid being trapped at Jack's cabin with mosquitoes the size of B-52 bombers.
Jack loaded up his truck and headed north on I-25 only to park it at the Denver airport and hop a plane bound for Los Angeles. Once he arrived at the airport he picked up the car he had reserved just before Sam's flight arrived. He greeted her when she arrived and the two left for some quiet time together in Malibu. Things were fine between them until they returned to Colorado where they began to discuss what had happened on the mission.
In one of their heated discussions Jack advised Sam that on his team no one gets left behind. She asked him if that included him and brought up when he had been hit by a staff blast. He said that was different only to have Sam ask him how it was different, but he didn't answer her. Unfortunately all they seemed to do for the last three days of their downtime was argue. Each day the arguments seemed to get more intense until the third day when Sam said that she was tired of the double standard on the team, stating there was one set of rules for the team and another set of rules for him. Sam was so angry with every excuse that Jack tried to use and told him to treat her like the other members of the team. Instead of explaining things Jack just shouted out words that were cruel and harsh.
Sam left so upset she cried all night wondering what had gone wrong between them. Normally she wouldn't have been so upset but some reason this argument upset her more than usual. Sam kept trying to convince herself that it was just the heat of the argument that made him say those things. She hoped that she would be able to talk with him at work but trying to do that proved impossible. He was assigned to the range for the next few days and was so tired after work that he didn't come by her house.
The silence between them was frustrating to Sam but what hurt even more was when the Colonel requested that she not go on the next mission. He advised General Hammond that Carter was still recovering from the poison arrow and was extremely tired. Sam was furious that he had cut her out of the team and when the team returned she decided to waited until Jack was home before she confronted him about excluding her from the mission. Things didn't go as planned and they argued again only this time in the heat of the moment Jack told her that maybe it would be better if she transferred to a position that wouldn't put her at such a great risk. She could not believe what he had said. Wasn't it her that always managed to save his backside? Wasn't it her who time and time again managed to figure out how to save Earth or the team?
When Sam returned home she sat down at her computer and started typing. When she finally stopped she read her letter and started to cry. She could not believe that this was the end but felt there nothing else left for her to do. SG-1 had been recalled to base for an emergency rescue of SG-5 but upon her reaching base she learned that she had been excluded from the rescue mission once again per Jack's request. She looked at her letter she brought with her and knew that it was the right thing to do.
The next morning she knocked on General Hammond's door and closed it after she entered. She handed him her request for a transfer. He asked her if she had discussed this decision with Colonel O'Neill and she advised that they had discussed it. Then she told him that her injury shook her up and made her revaluate her life and what was important to her. Reluctantly General Hammond accepted her transfer and asked her if she wanted to wait for SG-1 to return. She smiled stating she had already said her good-byes to the team and that she felt it would be best if the transfer went into effect immediately. Sam advised she had been contacted by Dr. McKay concerning a project he wanted her working on a week ago and that he was anxious for her assistance. General Hammond shook Sam's hand and said it was an honor to have served with her then gave her a hug telling her that she was always welcomed at the SGC. Sam left the General's office with tears in her eyes.
Okay so she fibbed a little bit but she did tell the truth when she said that Dr. McKay had contacted her about a project at Area 51, and she did say good-bye to each of the members of the team in a letter. The letter to Jack was the shortest of all stating that she felt that she could no longer work at the SGC under the current circumstance and informed him that it was an honor and privilege to have served with him.
SG-1 returned five days later with their injured and several local villagers too. Colonel O'Neill was asked to stay behind after the post mission briefing. He sat in the General's office stone face when informed of Sam's transfer. He pretended that this was something that he and Major Carter had discussed instead of something two lovers yelled at each other in the heat of an argument. He left the General's office and was walking to his office when he was confronted by Daniel who asked Jack if he knew about Sam's wanting to transfer. Jack said that he and Carter had discussed it and walked past Daniel without another comment.
After finishing his paperwork he left for home with a side trip to Sam's house. He was surprised to see a For Sale sign up in her front yard. He walked up to the house and saw boxes stacked in the hallway. Letting himself in he noticed all of her personal belongings now appeared to be in boxes waiting to be picked up by movers. He was angry at her for leaving so suddenly. She didn't have the audacity to talk to him in person about her decision and then added insult to injury by saying it was an honor to have served with him. She acted as if he was nothing but her commanding officer instead of the man shared her bed and who shared his love with her. Why didn't she realize he was only trying to keep her safe, she meant too much to him and he couldn't risk loosing her. Sure he had said some cruel words in haste but he never expected her to transfer. The next day when he went by her home as the movers were pulling away from the house with the Real Estate lady putting a special lock on the front door now that the home was devoid of Carter's belongings.
Jack was really mad now. He had learned Sam went to Area 51 and a part of him was ready to hop in his truck, drive there and haul her back kicking and screaming if he had to. He would have done it too if he hadn't been so exhausted. He had been so upset the night before that he only got a couple of hours of sleep and knew that he needed more sleep and a clear head before confronting Sam. At least that was what he had planned, but not what happened. Duty called, keeping him from being able to retrieve the woman he loved. For the next couple of months SG-1 was busier than usual not allowing him to go get her. Finally things had slowed down and he thought about Sam and decided if she wanted out than he would oblige her and let her stay at Area 51.
Sam could not shake how tired she was and figured that it was from having to move to Utah so quickly. On one of her secret visits to Colorado Springs to visit Janet, she asked Janet if there were any signs of the toxin still in her blood because she was so exhausted all of the time. Janet knew why Sam was so tired but had never gotten a chance to tell her. Janet sat Sam down on the sofa and informed Sam why she was so tired and run down and the news practically floored Sam. Now it all made sense. She now understood why she was so irritable, moody and felt run down all of the time; she was pregnant. Janet asked Sam if she was going to tell the father about the baby and noticed Sam's eyes quickly fill with tears. It all made sense to her, she knew in an instant who the father of Sam's baby was because there was only one man who brought out such strong emotions in her friend. Janet told Sam it was okay and he would never know of this from her. Sam was surprised by Janet's comment and asked her how she knew. Janet smiled and said it was obvious but not to worry as she would keep her secret. Before leaving Janet gave Sam the name of a doctor to see in Utah during her pregnancy and told her to keep in touch.
As Sam left she thought about when she first got to Area 51 and she had wished Jack would have come and carried her back to the SGC telling her that he would never let her go. Then she remembered the harsh words they said to one another and decided it was the best if she stayed in Utah and he stay in Colorado. She placed her hand over her abdomen where the life inside of her was growing and smiled. He may not be in her life any more but he would always be in her heart and she would see the best of him in their child. She had wanted a new start when she moved to Utah and how she had it; a new job, a new boss, a new house, and now she had a new life growing within her. She rubbed her abdomen and said "I love you" to her unborn child as the plane landed in Utah.