Story Notes: Note: This was originally "Gratuitous Narim Death Abounds", the sequel to my list "Gratuitous Martouf Death Abounds", but after thinking about it a bit, I decided that I didn't hate Narim as much as I do Marty and I let up a bit. Just a bit. This isn't as good as GMDA, but I had to get it out of my system.

10. No one ever knew that Teal'c was such an expert animal trainer. Likewise, no one could understand why the good, loyal, sweet kitty-cat Schrodinger would so savagely attack Narim.

+++ Determined to get back on Sam's good side, Narim offered to accompany SG-1 on a couple routine missions. Hoping to gains some insight into the Tollans technology, Hammond agreed +++

9. For no reason other than his own stupidity, Narim was injured, requiring emergency surgery. Unfortunately, all SG-1 had to work with was a spoon and a pair of nail clippers.

8. SG-1 and Narim ended up on a planet whose culture was tightly dictated by a group calling themselves The Fashion Police. He never had a chance...

7. While picking up Klorel with the other Tok'ra, Martouf heard Narim bragging to his buddies about a certain encounter with Sam Carter a few years back... and decided he knew of the PERFECT host.

6. After realizing that Earth's Stargate was, in fact, BIGGER, Narim settled into a horrible depression, slowly declining into total madness revolving around 'size' issues.

5. In a freak accident, his 'watch-me-walk-through-walls' technology failed him mid-wall.

4. As a gesture of good faith, Narim offered to show O'Neill the signaling device used in 'enigma', If he'd know how technically inept the man was, he wouldn't have bothered; it wasn't Jack's fault the guy's head was in the way!

3. The technology that disabled SG-1's weapons was strangely... miscalibrated.

2. As a friend, Jack pointed the Tollan to Argos as THE spot for R&R. And the little cakes are simply to DIE for...

1. Ya see, there was this guy, a Colonel Jack O'Neill, who theorized that if you put an ugly, lovelorn Tollan in a box, and added a can of poisonous gas activated by the decay of a radioactive atom, and then closed the box...


End Notes: Did anyone else think that Jack was treating Narim exactly like he treats Marty (which contempt)? Thanks in advance; hope you got a laugh out of this.


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