"How could you say that to me" Sam screamed as she slapped Jack's face hard.
When Sam slapped his face it really stung. Jack knew that there would be a big red mark from the slap. Sam turned and ran down the hallway. Daniel turned the corner to see what had made the noise.
"Jack what was that noise?" Daniel said.
Jack turned to face Daniel and then Daniel realized what had made the noise. He looked at Jack and asked what he said to Sam to make her do that. Jack said that he wasn't sure, he just said something about her actions in the locker room after coming back from the Land of Light. Daniel shook his head and asked Jack when he was going to let Sam live that down. Jack said that he was only kidding with Sam. Daniel said that he deserved the slap and walked off leaving Jack standing alone in the hallway.
Jack went to his office to do some paperwork. When he got to his office he looked at his face in the mirror and was surprised at how red and obvious her hand print was on his face. He sat at his desk and pulled the first set of papers off the "to do" stack. He had a headache so he took some aspirins to take care of the headache before starting his paperwork.
The paperwork he pulled up was on the team's mission to Abydos to pick up Daniel and Teal'c after he and Sam had received the Air Medal Award for Meritorious Performance. He looked at the paperwork and scratched his head. He couldn't understand it, he knew that he had done this paperwork a long time ago. Yet now it showed to be blank. He remembered that it had been over a year since that had happened. He thought that maybe General Hammond wanted him to rewrite the report. He remembered that he had a hard time concentrating on writing up that mission, he could not get the accident about the reporter out of his mind. He finished the report and then pulled out the next mission paperwork, which was when they went against orders to try and stop the invasion of Earth. He thought about it and remembered that this was well over a year old. He could not figure out what these old reports were doing here, especially since he finished them so long ago.
Suddenly Jack's head began to hurt again, and he decided that he had enough paperwork for one night. He went to his quarters and planned on taking a short nap to get rid of the headache instead of getting more aspirins. He knew that Dr. Fraiser and Dr. Mackenzie were keeping an eye on the amount of aspirins that SG team members were consuming. As Jack was dozing off he was wondering why he had such old paperwork on his desk. He knew that he had completed those reports long ago. Sleep overtook him and everything faded to black.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
When Jack woke up he looked at his alarm clock and saw that it was 0700HRS. He got up and started walking to the cafeteria for a cup of coffee. Daniel met him in the hall and told him to come on, they were about to be late for the briefing. Jack walked with Daniel to the briefing room and got his coffee there.
General Hammond allowed Daniel to give his information about the planet, Cimmeria, saying that they are our ancient ancestors from the Viking days. Jack shook his head, thinking that this is old information. He pinched himself to make sure he wasn't asleep. It hurt him so he knew that he was awake and that this was real. But how could that be, they went to Cimmeria a long time ago and they even met the Asgards on the second visit. Now Jack was really confused. He sat there quietly while Daniel continued with his briefing and then he realized that Carter was not there.
Daniel finished his information and then General Hammond announced that there was a new team member. Jack started to say something when an airman walked into the room and smartly saluted the General and Jack.
"Lt. Gilbert Michaels reporting for duty, sir" the newest team member said.
Jack started objecting and General Hammond gave him a look that Jack understood perfectly. The look meant for him to shut up and sit down. Hammond went on to advise that Michaels was a graduate from Berkley, with a degree in Physics. Jack grimaced because he knew that he didn't need a third scientist on his team. After the introductions were made, General Hammond quietly asked Jack to remain behind for a minute.
Hammond told Jack that Lt. Michaels was assigned to SG-1 and that this was not up for discussion. Jack asked where Sam was and General Hammond gave Jack a look that meant that he was dismissed. Jack took the hint and left General Hammond's office without saying another word.
The team stood at the base of the platform waiting for the seventh symbol to lock into place. There was the familiar whoosh of the wormhole being established and SG-1 stepped through the event horizon to Cimmeria.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Welcome back SG-1. Debriefing in one hour" General Hammond said.
Jack walked out of the embarkation room to try and find Sam in her lab, but she wasn't there. He spotted the coffee cup he gave her last year for Christmas and it had warm coffee in it. He knew that she was probably somewhere close by.
Jack then went to the infirmary in search of Sam. He knew that Dr. Fraiser and Sam were friends and she would know where Sam was hiding.
"Hi ya Doc. Have you seen Sam or Dr. Fraiser around?" Jack asked.
"Who?" Dr. Warner replied.
"You know, Sam Carter and Dr. Fraiser. So have you seen them lately?" Jack asked again.
Dr. Warner then said that he was the only doctor on staff right now, but they were expecting several other doctors at the end of the month. Dr. Warner asked a nurse if she knew this Sam Carter that Colonel O'Neill was referring to. She said that they do not have any personnel by that name here. Jack then described Dr. Fraiser to Dr. Warner, but Dr. Warner said that since Major Kawalski had killed the other doctor, he was the only one on staff at the SGC.
A very confused Jack left the infirmary and went back to Sam's lab. He opened the door and spotted Lt. Michaels in the lab. Only this time the lab was different, it was a lot messier than what Sam usually likes. Jack came in and started straightening up the mess and then Lt. Michaels came up and asked him what he was doing. Jack mentioned that Carter was going to kill him for making such a mess in her lab. Lt. Michaels advised Colonel O'Neill that this was his laboratory and that he did not share it with anyone else. Jack then asked him where the cup came from, pointing to the cup he had seen earlier. Lt. Michaels looked puzzled when he saw what Colonel O'Neill was pointing to. Lt. Michaels grabbed the cup and showed it to Colonel O'Neill. #1 Daddy, was printed on the cup.
"Colonel sir, this cup was given to me by my daughter last Christmas and I brought it up here to remind me of her when I'm not at home with my family" Lt. Michaels said.
Jack grabbed the cup and looked at it again. This was not the same cup that had seen earlier. Realizing that Colonel O'Neill was having a problem, Lt. Michaels called Dr. Daniel Jackson to come help him with the Colonel.
Jack felt that he was just stressed out and needed to work it off. He exited the lab before Daniel arrived. Jack went to Teal'c's quarters and decided that he would give boxing with Teal'c another chance. He knocked on the door and a female airman answered the door. Jack thought this was odd for Teal'c to be involved with an Earth female, he was married.
"May I help you with something sir" the female airman said after giving a quick salute.
"I'm looking for Teal'c is he here?" Jack asked.
"Who?" the airman replied.
"You know... Teal'c. Gold emblem on his forehead and junior in his belly" Jack said.
"A Jaffa?" the airman replied.
"Well technically he's a Jaffa, but he's a friend" Jack said.
"Begging the Colonel's pardon, we are fighting against the Goa'ulds and Jaffas. We are not friendly with them" the airman stated in a firm voice.
Jack pushed past the airman to look in the room. He figured that this joke had gone on long enough. As he looked around he saw that this was obviously a female's quarters from the way it was decorated. Jack stepped out and apologized to the airman, saying that he had obviously gotten the wrong room. She closed the door and Jack looked at the number and saw that this was the room that Teal'c was assigned. He knew that something was wrong.
Daniel then walked up and asked Jack if he was feeling okay. Jack said that his head was pounding and that he needed to get to the infirmary. Upon reaching the infirmary Daniel explained to Dr. Warner what had just transpired. He decided to do a Cat Scan on Jack to see if he had suffered any head trauma lately.
Dr. Warner spoke to Jack over the intercom system while the scan was being done. Dr. Warner then told Jack that the General had just called down here asking for him. The General said to tell Colonel O'Neill to come to his office to discuss the mission. Jack finished the scan and then went to the General's office.
There it was again, a pounding in Jack's head. It was so intense that Jack stopped and leaned against the wall for a moment before continued his walk to the General's office. He knocked but there was no answer, so Jack stepped in and took a seat to wait on the General. The pain in his head was killing him. He leaned his arms on the desk so that he could brace his head in his hands. Just then he heard the General enter the room.
"Are you feeling alright Colonel O'Neill" the General said.
Jack looked up quickly, surprised by what he heard.
"Colonel, are you feeling alright" General West said.
"Where's General Hammond?" Jack asked.
General West then went on to advise that he has been in charge of this project since it started, and that there is no General Hammond here. Jack was very confused and suddenly the pain in his head stopped. General West told Jack that he was concerned about calling him back to duty so soon after his personal loss. Jack started wondering what was going on and was about to voice his opinion when the pounding in his head came back with a vengeance. General West dismissed Jack and told him to get to the infirmary.
Jack left the General's office and felt the pounding getting worse. He turned the corner to the elevator and spotted Daniel filling a coffee pot with water from a water fountain. Just as suddenly as the pounding started, it stopped. Jack walked up to Daniel and asked him how it was going. Daniel just grumbled something to Jack and walked away. Jack followed trying to find out what was wrong with Daniel and why he was acting so hostile towards him. He followed Daniel and wondered why Daniel wasn't going to his lab. Daniel walked through the double doors and poured the water into the coffee maker, then climbed up a ladder to stare at the coverstone.
"So what's wrong Daniel?" Jack said.
"Excuse me but I'm trying to work here. Is there something that I can help you with Colonel O'Neill" Daniel said.
Jack was surprised by that comment. Daniel was one of the few people that called him Jack, but just now he had just called him Colonel O'Neill like when they first met. Jack was wondering what had ticked Daniel off so much to vent his frustration out on him. He figured that Daniel must be having a bad day and so he just stood there silently watching Daniel.
"Look Colonel O'Neill, as soon as I figure out this coverstone than I will let you know. Until that time would you please back off. I don't need the military breathing down my neck all of the time" Daniel said.
Jack asked Daniel what was wrong, calling him by his first name. Daniel corrected Jack and advised that he should be referred to as Dr. Jackson since they were not on a first name basis. This statement really caught Jack by surprise. Jack pressed further by asking Daniel what he was doing. Dr. Jackson explained that he was trying to translate these figures on the coverstone, pointing to the seven symbols.
"What are you talking about Daniel, excuse me... Dr. Jackson, but those are star constellations. As a matter of fact that is the address to Abydos" Jack stated.
Daniel quickly climbed down the ladder and asked Col. O'Neill what he was talking about. Jack pointed to the symbols and said that the first six symbols were to a destination point and that the seventh symbol was the point of origin. Daniel asked the Colonel to explain further.
Jack pointed out the first symbol and said that was Taurus, the next was Serpens Caput, then Capricorn, Monoceros, Sagittarius, Orion, and finally Earth. Daniel Jackson looked surprised at what he heard. It had been there the whole time. He knew that some of the symbols looked familiar for some reason but he could not put his finger on it until now. He was mad because this unscientific military guy had solved in a matter of minutes what he hadn't been able to solve for almost two weeks.
"Colonel O'Neill, how do you know this?" Daniel Jackson asked.
"Oh come on Daniel, give me some credit. I just act as if I'm bored when you start talking about the STARGATE, I actually pay attention once in a while" Jack said.
Now Daniel Jackson was really confused. How did this guy know so much. He started asking the Colonel questions and was asking them faster than the Colonel could answer.
Suddenly the pain in Jack's head returned. It was worse this time than before he came to see Daniel. Finally Jack could stand it no more, he excused himself leaving Daniel Jackson in awe of information that had been eluding him for some time. The pain in Jack's head was getting worse, but instead of going to the infirmary he decided to go home. He could not understand that decision, but the pain in his head was less when he thought about home.
Jack then went topside and got into his vehicle and started driving home. As he approached the old neighborhood the pain in his head lessened some. Something told him to drive by his old house that Sarah now lived in. As he drove past he noticed a little boy playing out in the front yard. Suddenly he slammed on his brakes and pulled into the driveway.
Charlie ran up to the Jeep and told Jack that he was late for dinner. Sarah came out of the house and walked over to the vehicle as Jack slowly got out. Tears began to fill Jack's eyes at the site of his son, Charlie. Then Jack doubled over in pain as the pounding in his head worsened. Sarah and Charlie helped Jack into the house and into the bedroom. He heard Sarah talking to Charlie outside of the room, saying that his daddy had a headache and needed some rest.
Jack was sitting on the edge of the bed with his head down, resting it in his hands in an attempt to try and contain the pain. He heard the door open and saw Sarah's shoes as she stood in front of him. He looked up and saw her swollen belly.
"Whoa! What in the world?" Jack said.
"Oh come on Jack. I'm not that big since you last saw me. Stop teasing me. By the way I was wondering what you thought about the name of Charlie if we have a boy" Sarah said.
"Argh!" Jack shouted. His head felt like it was about to explode, the pain was maddening. He laid back on the bed and curled up in a fetal position. The pain was so much that Jack was slipping into unconsciousness. Everything around Jack was spinning, then Jack's sight faded to total darkness.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Jack opened his eyes and noticed that everything around him was bathe in bright white light, yet it didn't hurt his eyes. He found himself walking and soon he saw what appeared to be a park. He walked towards it and then he stepped into the park, leaving the whiteness behind. There was a man standing in the park by where he entered. He turned and looked at the elderly man and the elderly man smiled at Jack. He motioned with his hand that they should walk and so Jack and the elderly man walked down a trail. They walked the trail for what Jack believed was a mile when they came to a clearing where there was a picnic table. Jack took a seat and the elderly man sat opposite of Jack.
"Hi. Do I know you?" Jack asked.
"Yes... yes you do Jack. You look a bit confused, so I'll try to put you at ease. My name is Clarence."
Jack knew that the name was familiar but he could not remember where he heard the name. Jack then started asking Clarence questions such as where they had met before, what was this place and what just happened. Clarence smiled and told Jack that his wish had been granted.
"What wish are you talking about Clarence?" Jack asked.
"You know the wish Jack. The one where you said that you didn't want to live because you had killed your friends and how you wished that you had never become involved in the STARGATE project. Remember Jack? You said that once you woke up in the infirmary" Clarence said. Now Jack was very confused.
Clarence told Jack that he might remember him helping a man named George Bailey. He said that Jack was just like George, always looking out for others. Clarence told Jack that he was an Angel, Second Class. He said that he use to be an Angel First Class, but the advice he had given someone had gone terribly wrong. He said that his boss was upset with results from the advice he gave, and demoted him back down to Angel Second Class and removed his wings. Jack asked if he was dead, and Clarence told him not exactly. Clarence said that all of his questions would be answered in a little bit.
Clarence said that he had been assigned to help Jack at this time due to the prayers that were offered up in his name. Jack was very puzzled. Clarence said that God was so touched by the prayers offered by those close to him, so he decided to have someone check into the situation. God then informed Joseph, the head Angel, to assign this case to someone. Clarence said that Joseph felt so bad about having removed his wings that he decided to give him a second chance. Clarence said that this is almost like when he helped George and he hoped that this had the same results. He then told Jack that it never ceases to amaze him on how much one person could touch the lives of so many people.
Clarence stood up and told Jack to follow him. They walked down another trail, only this one led to a pond. Clarence told Jack to look into the pond. Jack asked him why and he replied that all of his questions would be answered by looking into the pond.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Jack looked down into the pond and saw Sarah. She was in some type of doctor's office crying. He could hear what she was saying. She told the doctor that she was so upset by his death. She said that they were going to try to start a family when Jack returned from his mission but he never returned. She sobbed into her hands, saying that now he's gone there would never be a family for them.
Jack grimaced and shook his head. He heard Sarah saying something else but she wasn't moving her lips.
"Damn you Jack, and damn the military. Why did you have to take that mission. I hate you for doing this to us...Oh God, I miss him" Sarah thought.
Clarence could see the confusion on Jack's face and explained that Jack could also hear what people were thinking as long as he was looking into this pond. Ripples appeared in the pond and the image of Sarah vanished.
Jack asked Clarence what was the importance of that vision. Clarence said that without him Sarah would not have given birth to their son. Jack eyes started watering, remembering the loss of his son, Charlie. Clarence stepped away, allowing Jack a few moments to grieve again for the loss of his son.
When Clarence returned, he explained the importance of seeing this vision. He advised Jack that it was the dead of his son that made him volunteer to work on the STARGATE project. Clarence told Jack that it was the thought of the STARGATE project being a one way mission that attracted Jack after the death of his son. Clarence then told Jack to look again into the pond.
Jack looked into the pond and saw Daniel on a dig in what he presumed to be Egypt. Daniel took a break for lunch, and during lunch a man entered the same tent Daniel was in. Daniel greeted the man and they sat and talked. Jack could see that Daniel's expression had changed, and then he could hear what was being said. The man had just told Daniel that funding for this dig had just been pulled. He advised Daniel that as the main financial backer, he convinced the rest of the investors to back away from the dig. He said that they believed that he digging for something that didn't exist.
The pond turned cloudy and then quickly cleared. It now showed Daniel in a library of a very expensive house. Daniel picked out a book, sat down in a chair and started reading. A female's voice called and Daniel answered her. She walked up to Daniel, lightly kissed his cheek then told him to get ready for the dinner party, and to put away those silly books. She walked out of the room and told Daniel to get busy.
Jack could read Daniel's thoughts and could tell that Daniel was wondering why he had ever married her. Daniel remembered that he did it in order to secure financing for a dig, a dig that went wrong. He regretted making that deal, but realized that there nothing he could do about it now. She had convinced him to dig in another spot different from where he wanted to dig. He found some treasures, but it wasn't what he wanted to find. His idea that someone other than the Egyptians building the pyramids had been proven, but by someone else. The theory was proven correct at the site where Daniel had originally wanted to dig. That dig did not yield the treasures that his dig did, but to Daniel proving his theory was more valuable than all the treasures he found on his dig. Jack could tell by Daniel's actions and thoughts that he was unhappy. Then ripples appeared across the pond and the vision stopped.
Clarence explained that since Jack never accepted the job to oversee the project, Catherine Langford would not get to continue working on the project. With the project shut down she would never call on Daniel to translate the cartouche from Giza. Jack told Clarence that he was not an important factor in Daniel's life. Clarence said because no one else wanted the job, General West shut down the entire project. Clarence said that Daniel was laughed out of academia because of his theory, and he had no where to go. He would go on different digs as a worker trying to get to know people so that he could obtain financial backing for his digs to prove his theory. Daniel managed to secure financial backing after several years, but this one had a special clause in it. The backer wanted to accompany Daniel on the dig and in his life. Soon Daniel was married, but for the wrong reasons and to the wrong woman.
Clarence gave Jack a few moments to collect his thoughts, and then told him to look again in the reflection of the pond. Jack stared into the pond and saw a Serpent guard firing its staff weapon. There was a great battle taking place between Ra's guards and Apophis's guards. It looked as if Apophis was loosing this battle. Then the serpent guard fell, killed by a blast from a staff weapon. The water clouded up and then went clear again. Jack stared into the pond and saw a battlefield with dead guards laying all around. He saw Apophis walk over to a guard and trigger the helmet so that it revealed the warrior under the helmet. Jack's eyes grew wide, he was in shock when he saw the warrior.
"You have served me well Teal'c" Apophis said.
Jack stood there with his mouth open until the vision was disrupted by the ripples in the pond. He then turned to Clarence and asked why Teal'c was dead. Clarence reminded Jack that it was he who convinced Teal'c to turn against Apophis and fight for freedom. He told Jack that since he wasn't involved on the STARGATE project, Teal'c never left Apophis and he died fighting for Apophis.
Jack took a few steps away from the pond to gather his thoughts. He asked Clarence why he was showing this to him. He said that he wanted to show Jack just how much he touched the lives of those around him. Jack told Clarence that he must be wrong, because all he brought to these people's lives was pain. He started telling Clarence about the how he got Daniel and Carter killed when they were on the Nox's planet. Clarence told him that it didn't happen. Jack then said how he almost got Carter court-martialed by going through the STARGATE to stop the invasion to Earth. Clarence shook his head stating that it didn't happen. Every time that Jack could think of a time in which his actions cause injury to his teammates, Clarence would shake his head and say that it never happened.
Jack started to walk back up the path and noticed that Clarence wasn't walking with him. He called out to Clarence and asked him if he was coming. Clarence smiled and motioned for Jack to come back. Jack said that he had seen enough, but Clarence told him to gaze just one more time into the pond. Jack turned away and walked back towards the picnic table. Clarence looked up and asked Joseph what he was going to do. He said that he couldn't make Jack look, and asked for some help. Jack was not about to go back down to the pond. He had seen enough, but his feet had a mind of their own. They walked him back down to the edge of the pond.
Clarence then told Jack to gaze once again into the pond. Jack looked and saw a picture of Carter. She was in military uniform and was one of many posing in front of a NASA logo on the wall. The bottom caption read, "Astronaut Candidates." Jack smiled knowing that at least Sam was living up to one of her dreams. The pool became cloudy and then cleared.
Jack watched the image of a space shuttle as it was about to be launched and heard the count down, "10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, Ignition. Lift off, we have a lift off" was said while the space shuttle rocketed into the sky. He could hear cheers go out as the shuttle climbed higher and higher. He then saw someone pat the shoulder of another sitting at a computer terminal.
"Way to go kiddo. Isn't it great. Your experiment will be performed in space" he said as someone elbowed him in the side.
"Oh sorry about that, I know you wanted to go into space to do the experiment yourself. Just have a little faith, there's always next time" the man said.
The image of the person the man was talking to became clear to Jack as the point of view now focused on the face of the person sitting at the terminal. It was Sam. He could hear her thinking of how she had wanted to go up in the space shuttle knowing that it was probably her last chance. The pond became cloudy then clear again. Sam was walking up to her apartment after the launching of the shuttle. As she was climbing the stairs he could hear her thinking. She was upset that she wasn't even invited to Florida for the launching of the space shuttle, they left her in Houston to watch the launching. She felt that was the ultimate slap in the face since they were going to let someone else prove her own theory with the experiment in space. She remembers thinking that she would be happy when she was reassigned to NASA, but this was not what she had in mind. She thought back about how in the early 1990's she was working on a project involving an alien device that had been unearthed in 1929 from a plateau in Giza. While she was working on the project she was happy, because the prospect of determine what the device could do was exciting. Then all of a sudden the project was shut down and she was transferred to NASA. She thought about her father and how proud of her he was when she was chosen to be a candidate for the astronaut program, it meant the world to him.
She sat there in her living room sobbing into a tissue, it was what she always did when she thought about her father. She was so glad that he wasn't here to see how she had failed, the cancer had taken him quickly. She felt that she didn't have enough time with him. She then started thinking about the device from Giza and a name popped into her head. She knew the name, it was on the tip of her tongue but right now the name escaped her. She wished that she could remember the man's name. She knew that if she could say his name out loud she would feel okay and things in her life would work out. She thought about his name but her mind was blank. She was emotionally spent and decided to call it a night. She turned off the lights in the apartment, turning off the lamp on her bed table as she crawled into bed. Jack wasn't sure at first what he heard, but then he could tell that it was Sam crying. He heard her mentally asking herself what she had ever done wrong to loose out on everything that made her happy. She just wished that she could have solved the puzzle of the device sooner, then maybe she would still be working on it instead of being stuck doing something she had come to despise. Jack felt an emptiness deep inside and wondered where this feeling was coming from.
The ripples in the pond appeared, and the vision was gone once again. Jack turned his head away from Clarence. He couldn't understand why he was feeling so sad at seeing the visions. It hurt almost as much as when he lost Charlie. Jack became upset that he could not control how he was feeling right now. He felt so sad for Teal'c, Daniel, and Sam.
"Don't try to stop it Jack. Let it, let the pain flow out of you" Clarence said. He stood back and allowed Jack some time to express his pain.
A few minutes later Clarence patted Jack on the shoulder and led him up the path back to the picnic table. Jack sat at the picnic table feeling numb inside. Clarence decided that this would be a good time to go back over things with Jack.
Clarence reminded Jack of the events that brought about his fateful wish. The team had gotten into a battle on a planet and had to fight their way back. All members of the team were injured, but Jack was hurt worse of all and his teammates had to carry him back to the gate. He said that Teal'c threw Daniel and Samantha through the wormhole and he carried Jack through just as he was hit in the leg. Teal'c fell through the wormhole to Earth, and all of them were rushed to the infirmary. Clarence told Jack that after he came out of surgery, he woke up in the infirmary with Daniel and Samantha in the beds next to him. He only heard a snippet of a conversation from a nurse, and she was saying something about Daniel and a coma. Then you heard an alarm to your other side. You turned and saw Samantha laying in that bed and heard someone shouting.
"Flat line... I need a crash cart now. She's flat lining" the nurse said.
Jack's eyes filled with tears as he now remembered everything that happened. He felt so guilt ridden that his teammates were now paying the price for his decision to explore further away from the gate on the planet. When SG-1 was attacked they had a long distance to retreat back to the STARGATE. By not having the tactical advantage, this allowed members of the team to become injured. Jack could not believe that he had made this type of mistake because it cost the safety of his team.
"Stop... Stop... STOP CLARENCE! I can't take it anymore. My friends had to pay for my mistake. Why couldn't it have been me instead. WHY??" Jack said.
The tears were flowing freely down Jack's face. He was not ashamed to be crying, only sad because he had to relive the pain. He remembered the sacrifice that his friends made for him. Jack sat there sobbing into his hands when Clarence offered him a handkerchief. Jack felt as if his heart was going to explode from the grief that he was carrying inside of it.
"Why Clarence?" Jack asked.
Clarence asked Jack if he had given up on himself and his friends. This quickly got Jack's attention. Clarence asked Jack if his still wanted his wish granted. Clarence told Jack that in his opinion, his friends were happy and proud to be doing their job which was different from what Jack saw in the pond. He told Jack that there were quite a few people asking God to intervene and to help him. Clarence said that God had decided to answer those prayers and that was why he was sent. Clarence said that his job was to see if Jack was ready for the biggest fight of his life, the one where he chose to live and to deal with the consequences of his actions. He asked Jack if he wanted to go back and fight for his life as well as the happiness of his friends; or stay here, no longer a part of the lives of those who once knew him.
Jack looked up at Clarence and asked what happened to his friends in the infirmary. Clarence said that was up to Jack, it was dependent on whether or not Jack wanted his wish granted. Jack told Clarence that he wanted to go back no matter what it held for him and his friends. Clarence knew that Jack wanted to ask more about Samantha, but that answer would only come about upon Jack's return.
Clarence patted Jack on the back and they walked back up the long trail. As they approached the end of the path Jack again saw the whiteness in front of him. Before Jack stepped into the whiteness, Clarence thanked him. Clarence said that God was pleased that he wanted to live. He then told Jack to trust in him and things would work out.
Jack smiled and started walking into the whiteness. As he was stepping through he could hear Clarence talking.
"Jack... Charlie says hello and said to tell you that you made the right decision."
As Jack faded into the whiteness Clarence looked up and asked Joseph if he did a good job. He was so hoping to get his wings back, but instead there was silence.
~*~*~*~*~*~
The white had faded into darkness. Jack blinked his eyes, and thought that he saw a small light in the distance. He walked to the light and knew that he was back. He felt something soft and warm holding his hand. He slowly opened his eyes and focused. He then saw a blonde head of hair that he immediately recognized. He smiled because she was alive and appeared to be okay. He moved and she detected this and she turned around to looked at him. She saw his eyes were open and he was smiling.
"Colonel?" Sam whispered.
"Carter" he whispered back.
Tears welled up in her eyes. She stood up, leaned over him and kissed his forehead. Jack felt something wet on his face. He looked up and noticed that she was crying. It felt great because it meant that she was still alive, and so was he. She then whispered that she would be right back, and gave his hand a squeeze.
"He's awake... Janet... He's awake!" Sam screamed as she ran past Dr. Fraiser's office. Sam continued running and ran into the hallway. She was running to find the rest of the team and tell them that Jack was awake.
Dr. Fraiser was immediately at Jack's bed and started examining him. After the brief exam she had a big smile on her face. She welcomed him back and he seemed a bit confused by her statement. She told him that he has been in a coma for over three weeks. She said that Teal'c, Daniel and Sam have been sitting with him 24-7 to make sure that he saw a familiar face when he woke up. She told Jack that even while the team was recovering from their own injuries they made sure that someone was with him.
The sound of the infirmary doors flying open followed by the sound of running footsteps got his attention. Jack looked up to see Daniel and Teal'c now standing at his bedside, and Carter was running up with General Hammond in tow.
Dr. Fraiser allowed them to say their welcome backs to Jack and then chased them out of the room. She advised that believe it or not, Jack needed some rest and she pulled the curtain closed. She told them to come back in the morning. She told Jack to get some rest and that she would see him in the morning. Jack asked her what time it was, and she said it was 0400HRS. Jack reminded her that it was morning, and she told him to sleep saying that it was still early in the morning.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Jack again awoke to the touch of something soft and warm holding his hand. He opened his eyes and saw that she was again holding his hand. Just seeing and feeling this was great for his morale.
Sam asked him how he was feeling and he said better since he saw that she was alright. She looked puzzled and so he explained that he heard her flat line before he went into the coma. She smiled and said that a nurse had just tripped on the cord, disconnecting it from the monitor. She said that she was fine. He smiled and said he was glad she was okay and she was here and not in Houston. She asked what he meant by that and he told her that he would explain it sometime when she had a couple of hours.
A minute later Daniel and Teal'c entered the room, Daniel was carrying a potted tree with Christmas decorations which he set down beside Jack's bed. He handed Jack the card from the plant and advised him that this had just been delivered for him. Jack opened the card and a big smile went across his face.
Dear Jack,
Wishing you a speedy recovery. Remember that no man walks alone as long as they have friends. You are the bond that holds the team together. Thanks for the wings!
~Clarence~
At that time everyone's attention was drawn to the television set which was showing the movie, "It's A Wonderful Life" staring Jimmy Stewart. It was the end of the movie where George Bailey returned home to his family and friends. They were all standing around the Christmas tree and the little girl, ZuZu, is in George's arms.
"Look Daddy. Teacher says every time a bell rings an angel gets its wings" ZuZu said.
As the bell was ringing in the movie, a bell on Jack's decorated tree also started ringing.
"Way to go Clarence. Thanks for everything!" Jack said just above a whisper and with a smile on his face.
Sam looked at the tree, at Jack, back to the movie, and then back to Jack. Her eyes got very big and she was wonder if she was imagining things. The bell rang again and Jack's smile got even bigger. Sam wondered why the bell was ringing because there was no breeze in the infirmary. She looked back at Jack and smiled, deciding she was definitely imagining things.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Jack had a very busy day filled with visits from most of the personnel at the SGC. Jack didn't realize that this many people cared about him. He was glad that he decided to come back.
Sam was sitting with him when he fell asleep. In his dream state Jack could hear Clarence thanking him again for the wings, saying that he was an Angel First Class again. Jack thanked Clarence for his guidance. Clarence then said that he would see Jack much later. As Clarence was leaving Jack asked him what was the name that Sam had thought of that brought her so much happiness. Clarence smiled and told him he would know soon enough.
Jack knew that he was still asleep but for some reason he was aware of everything going on around him. Sam patted his hand, stood and leaned over him, kissing his forehead. "Good Night Jack" she whispered.
She knew that this was the most she could do to express how she felt about him without risking both of their careers. She cared for him so much more but dared not tell him. Jack could see and feel her kissing his forehead, as if he were awake.
Just then the bell on the tree jingled again. Sam thought about the movie, the bell ringing, the card on the tree and wondered if her suspicions were true. Then her head was filled with one name and she smiled at thinking about it. She turned around with smile on her face and was looking right at Jack.
"Jack... It's your name that makes me happy... Jack. Just saying it makes me smile. It's been like that from the first time I ever read about you involved in the STARGATE project" she whispered to him.
She knew that his name was a source of happiness to her in the past and in the present, but she had no idea how much more it would mean to her in the future. She had no idea what made her finally admit it, no less say that out loud. It felt good doing that and it filled her heart with happiness and made her smile. She looked down at Jack and saw that he was now smiling, as if he heard her. She checked and determined that he still was asleep because of his slow deep breathing. It was almost as if he heard her when she said his name.
Jack fell into a deeper sleep with a feeling of peace all around him. What he heard lifted his spirits and made them soar. He was happy, happy to have heard the name and happy it was his name that made her feel that way.
*~*~*~*~*~*
Clarence was standing in front of Joseph thanking him for his wings. Joseph told Clarence that he deserved them, and that he did an especially good job this time. He said that the boss was pleased with the results. Joseph said that it was nice that he went the extra mile to guide Jack in that direction to someone special. He said that it was time for them to make their own destiny, and it was now up to them. Joseph gave Clarence a big smile and excused himself.
Clarence walked away and after walking a while he stopped. He looked down through the clouds at the slumbering man below him. "Sleep well my friend knowing that someone cares deeply for you."
Clarence was very pleased with his job, but planned on coming back to check up on Jack to see if he followed his heart to find happiness. He saw Charlie and told him that his father was doing fine. Charlie thanked Clarence for helping his father make the right decision. Charlie said that he was happy that his father was going to start enjoying life again, because his father had such a hard time living after he left. All Charlie ever wanted for his father was for him to be happy and he seemed to be on the right track now. Clarence and Charlie walked away leaving the slumbering man to rest, both pleased with the job Clarence did.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The end.
Story Notes: AUTHOR'S NOTES: ~*~* Designates a change in scene or action. Be prepared for a mushy stuff. What do you expect, it's a Christmas story. Please note that the last few lines are this author's wishes for you who have braved through this to read the story. I hope you enjoy the story, your feedback is appreciated.
End Notes: Merry Christmas to all, and to all a Good Night.
It is the hope that this season will bring you happiness and good cheer.
May the true meaning of Christmas never be lost in your heart.
It is the hope that this season will bring you happiness and good cheer.
May the true meaning of Christmas never be lost in your heart.
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]