"We drew straws. I lost…" Daniel offered before wandering off down the hall, his teammates just behind him.
Samantha Carter stole a brief, casual glance backwards as she walked away from her Commanding Officer. Blue eyes shone with laughter, and even a little relief, but something more lingered below the surface, gleaming just as brightly. Anger. *That damned Jack O'Neill,* she found herself grumbling silently as she forced her eyes away from the handsome Colonel. *He just pops back in again with some half-ass explanation of how he wasn't allowed to tell us what was going on and everything is supposed to go right back to normal, like nothing happened.* Her mental tirade continued as her footsteps quickened, taking her further down the corridor. The words of her other teammate, Daniel Jackson, fell on deaf ears as she made her way towards the elevators. *Sonofabitch. I'm never going to understand how he works. How he can turn that charm on and off at will to get whatever he wants. That's really sick.*
Reaching the elevator she stabbed impatiently at the button, wanting to get as far away from Colonel O'Neill as she could before she blew. *Just what I used to do with my father,* she mused unhappily to herself as she entered the elevator and the doors closed behind her. *When things get too intense, get out quick before you say something you can't take back, because if you blow your top at him…* She sighed as she leaned back against the rear of the elevator car, and rubbed her eyes. *If you blow your top at him he'll what? Leave you? He's not even with you, Sam,* she reminded herself. *And, that's not even what you want. Is it? No, of course not. It would just be a bad career move to blow your stack at your C.O., no matter how much he deserves it,* she rationalized.
The elevator stopped and the doors slid open, letting Carter out on the floor where her quarters were located. She walked briskly down the corridor, offering a perfunctory smile and nod at another officer she passed, without really seeing him.
She closed to door behind her and stood alone in her dimly illuminated quarters, her own thoughts more deafening in the silence of the room. "How do you always manage to act like a shit and come out smelling like a rose, Colonel?" she muttered, leaning against her door, arms crossed defensively over her chest. Angry eyes glanced about the close confines of her quarters, looking for something to throw. "Maybe we would have been better off leaving you on Edora with that… that… that mealy-mouthed, simpering, good little housekeeper. Yeah, O'Neill, she was quite a catch," she fumed. "She had all her own teeth. Probably."
"Meow," she sighed miserably, pushing away from the door. Sam ran a hand through her already tousled blonde hair. Her jaw clenched as the memory came unbidden once again, playing and replaying through her mind. The rush of elation, of relief as she gated to Edora, as she caught sight of Colonel Jack O'Neill, looking tanned and fit from his months of labor under the sun.. Out of uniform, dressed in the homemade garments of the villagers he still looked out of place. There was something too bright about O'Neill's energy.
The memory soured and the feeling of elation evaporated. Without even so much as a, "Thanks, Carter," or, hell, even a "Hi, Carter," he'd turned away from his second in command, dismissing her from his line of vision and mind..
"Three months," she murmured bitterly. "Three months of killing myself for you… sleepless nights, living on coffee, driving everyone around me nuts… Damnit, why do I even try?!" she asked angrily, kicking out a booted foot and making solid contact with the wastepaper basket by her desk. Trash went flying, crumpled papers and candy bar wrappers scattering about the floor with an unsatisfying lack of sound. "Why do I even try?" she repeated more softly, frustration and resignation thick in her voice.
Dropping to her knees she began to gather the debris from the floor, the knock at her door startling her from her thoughts. Rising again, in no mood for company, she considered briefly not answering the knock.
The voice on the other side of the door, calling to her, drove the thought from her mind. "Carter!"
"Damn." She knew Jack's voice, and knew her C.O. well enough to know that he'd stand out there until Hell froze over if he wanted something. She opened the door and stood in the entrance. "Yes, Sir?" she asked politely.
Jack O'Neill stood in the corridor, peering over the Major's shoulder into the small room for a moment before turning his eyes back to her. "I was… just wondering if you wanted to come into town with us for a couple of beers," he offered casually, rocking back on his heels.
*The very picture of nonchalance.* "I don't think so, Sir. But, thank you for the offer," she responded, forcing a small smile to her face.
"You sure?" he asked, the look of mild surprise on his face undeniable. "I'm buying," he clarified.
"I'm sure. But, thanks." Carter stepped back from the door and started to close it when his hand caught the edge, holding it open.
"Look, Carter," he said quietly. "I'm trying to make nice, okay? I know I've ruffled some feathers here, and I know it's not a good thing to have ruffled feathers on a team. Especially ours."
"No, it's not," she agreed emphatically, forcibly reigning in the anger she felt returning. "We've got to trust each other."
"Carter, you of all people know how hard it is being ordered to keep something important from the people in your life you're supposed to be able to talk to," Jack offered in his own defense.
"Yes. Yes, I do," she admitted, her frustration level rising again. *Yes, I understand it, damnit. But, I don't like it. I don't even know who I'm pissed off at now. You, or myself.*
"I know that… things are on kind of unsteady ground right now," he confessed. "I just wanted to try to get us back on track again. All of us."
Sam studied his face for a long moment, carefully avoiding the eye contact that she knew would drain her resolve to be angry with the man.
"So… are you gonna come out with us and let me buy you a beer and apologize, or are you gonna stay here and beat up on your trashcan some more?" he asked, backing away from the door. "C'mon, Carter. I haven't even had a chance to thank you for getting my sorry ass home so I'd be here to abuse all of you," he added, showing the first signs of true uncertainty in his eyes.
*I think that's probably the best you're going to get from the man, Sam,* the small voice of reason in her head advised. *Go. Have a beer. Let him apologize. Life goes on. What more did you want from him, Sam?* Forcing the voice in her head to silence before it gave her an answer she couldn't face at the moment, she nodded. "Okay. One beer," she agreed, reaching inside for her jacket.
"A beer and a burger," O'Neill counter-offered as the pair headed off to the elevators.
fin
Story Notes: EMAIL: PhantomHack@inorbit.com
ARCHIVE: SJA and Heliopolis, all others with permission
SPOILERS: 100 Days, Shades of Grey
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is my first fic here, and I'm new to the list. The following short story just kind of popped into my head this morning.
ARCHIVE: SJA and Heliopolis, all others with permission
SPOILERS: 100 Days, Shades of Grey
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is my first fic here, and I'm new to the list. The following short story just kind of popped into my head this morning.
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]