"Have you ever had one of those lifetimes? A lifetime where you wish things could be a hell of a lot different?
That's how I feel about mine at this point, but I'll get to the point in a few minutes. Just bear with me.
Let me introduce myself. I'm Colonel Jack O'Neill, a United States Air Force officer. I'm the leader of
a team known as SG-1. My second-in-command is Major Samantha Carter, and the other two members are Doctor Daniel Jackson and an alien Jaffa named, Teal'c.
Now a Jaffa, if you're wondering, is a servant of beings known as the Goa'uld. They're a parasitic race that takes humans as hosts against their will. The Tok'ra, the offshoot of the Goa'uld, are no better in my opinion. Especially that frumpy one, Freya, Anise, what ever.
About four years ago, I was called out of retirement for the second time. Apparently after Daniel, who remained on Abydos after defeating Ra, and I killed Ra, another of his race decided to visit Earth. Major General George Hammond had me return to Abydos, after finding out the truth, to bring Daniel home.
When we held the briefing for the mission, I was introduced to Sam Carter, who at that time was a Captain. She was sharp-tongued, beautiful, and had my full, and complete, attention. Hence the reason why I wish my life was different now. Oi!
From the moment Sam said, 'You know, you really will like me once you get to know me." I knew she was right. She couldn't have been farther from the truth.
As the months progressed, my attraction for her grew, no matter how much I fought it. She makes me feel good about myself.
We've been through a lot. Carter's been kidnapped and traded, I've had two doubles, Carter and I have nearly frozen to death, we thought Daniel had died, dealt with Hathor twice, and a lot more things that would take too much time to go into.
The thing that brought my feelings to boil over was this whole Zatarc thing. I had decided to help Freya, Anise, whoever in finding a way to help Carter. Just as Freya and I were about to begin, Doc Fraiser stopped her. A few minutes later, Carter came in asking for a minute alone with me and I found out that we really weren't those Zarc things.
When Freya began the procedure, Carter was watching me. And that's when I admitted my feelings out loud.
~*~ "I would have rather died myself than lose Carter." I say to my small audience.
"Why?" Freya asks me. I look at Carter, not hiding the emotion in my eyes.
"Because I care about her. A lot more than I'm supposed to." I say, not breaking
eye contact. If I'm not mistaken, I see a slight grin on her soft, pink lips. ~*~
I sit here now, thinking of the one and only time that I initiated a kiss with Carter. The last times that Carter and I kissed were, when she was "touched" and when I kissed her alternate self.
The kiss that I'm talking about was during my "looping" as Daniel so aptly called it. I thought about the things I could do and not worry about the consequences. Thanks to Daniel, that is. So I thought about it short and hard. If that's possible.
I tried pottery, I played golf with Teal'c in the Gate Room, and yes, the Gate was active. I also rode a bike through the corridors.
But the one that I had a pleasure of doing, I wish had lasted longer. I handed General Hammond my resignation and took Sam in my arms and kissed her like there was no tomorrow, and she responded by putting her left arm around my neck and plunging her tongue into my mouth. I wouldn't change that for anything."
There's a knock on my office door and I get up to answer it, leaving my leather bound journal open on my desk.
"Hey, Colonel." Carter greets when my door opens.
"Hey Carter," I say. "What's up?"
"Nothing," she says. "I was heading home and I was wondering what plans you had."
"Oh," I reply. "None really. Want some company?" I throw a lopsided grin in for good measure.
"Yeah," she says. "I'd like that."
"Okay," I say, my grin growing into a smile. "Let me close up shop."
"If I can ask," Sam questions. "What were you doing?"
"Just writing in my journal." I reply, not lying to the woman I love.
"Oh, that should be an interesting read." She comments as I close the door to my office.
"If you're good," I start to say. "You might get to read it." With that, I grab her hand, entwining my fingers with hers and give her a kiss on her right cheek.
THE END
Story Notes: AUTHOR'S NOTE: Another "late night/early morning" work induced fic. Hope you enjoy it. My muse liked tormenting me with this idea.
BTW, my muse needs a name. Help her! :)
~*~ represents flashback
Copyright 2000 TIFFANY FLOWERS
BTW, my muse needs a name. Help her! :)
~*~ represents flashback
Copyright 2000 TIFFANY FLOWERS
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]