Story Notes: This is based in my canon - where ... I dunno, Jack and Sam left it in the room, but had a bit more of a talk about it afterwards ...
Author's Notes: Spoilers for Entity
Please review :) se_mcdermott@hotmail.com
Please review :) se_mcdermott@hotmail.com
“It’s not your fault.”
He scoffed, a dull, quiet sound so alien coming from the man in front of him that he was stumped for a moment. He wondered if his friend was consciously making the effort not to move any muscle in his body – he doubted they taught that level of stillness in black-ops. He tried another tactic.
“She doesn’t blame you.”
This time he didn’t even get a sound.
Daniel felt like rolling his eyes, never before had the term “talking to a brick wall” seemed to apt, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He sat down on the floor and leant against the sofa, lightly tossing his keys onto the coffee table, showing his friend how he’d got into the house. And he waited.
Because that’s what you did with Jack O’Neill. You waited. Occasionally you’d drink and hopefully you’d laugh, but more-often-than-not, you waited.
It was forty-five minutes of the sort of silence that hung over their heads like a thick fog before Jack spoke. It was as though (and Daniel thoroughly blamed an unknown entity) had taken the dial of ‘Jackness’ and turned it down, to almost catatonic, he was almost unrecognisable. “Almost” because Daniel did recognise the look on Jack’s face and the sound of his voice. It was pretty damn close to the position he’d taken when he’d thought the men weren’t looking on the Abydonian desert. Daniel’s ego took a quick trip at the knowledge that the private man didn’t bother hiding from him.
“I killed her.” It wasn’t much but as the cliché goes: it was better than nothing. “I knowingly and willingly killed her Daniel. I held the zat. I shot it. My fault. I-“
“I know what you did.”
And he snapped. The length of elastic running through him had reached its limit and it snapped. “Then what the hell are you doing here?” Jack leapt to his feet and almost jogged to the kitchen, desperately needing to do something with his useless energy.
“I’m here to tell you that she doesn’t blame you. She asked me to come.” He tried to catch Jack’s eyes but his friend was moving so fast (around the toaster as far as Daniel could tell) that he couldn’t. “Anybody would have tried to do the same. You’re a hero Jack!”
“For killing her! Fuck Daniel! I. Killed. Carter.”
“Yes.” Daniel deflated while Jack was still a tightly wound coil of tension. He stood in the kitchen leaning forward on the counter; his back stiff and straight as the smell of burnt toast began to surround them. But neither man moved.
“I killed her Daniel. Dead.”
“But she’s not. Dead I mean.”
“That doesn’t matter.”
Daniel wasn’t sure if the fact that Jack was getting tenser and tenser was a good thing, but he couldn’t think of how to stop it. “It was the right thing to do – you made the right decision.”
“That doesn’t matter!” Jack stopped, took a deep breath and stared at him straight in the eyes, “What if it was Sha’re? What if you killed her?”
“It’s not the same thing!” It was at that moment that Daniel understood. He didn’t need to hear Jack’s quiet mutter, but he didn’t miss it.
“No. It’s not.” Jack seemed to fall onto his hands and leant against the counter. “You … you had her Daniel. You had time as her …”
“Husband?”
Jack just shrugged, “not important.”
Daniel shook his head and bit back a groan. This was not happening. “Jack. Sam asked me to come here, she’s worried about you.”
“So?”
“So I think maybe I should get her to come and-“
Jack snapped back up and Daniel would tell he was physically stopping himself from throttling him. “Leave Daniel. Leave me be and definitely don’t call Carter.” Jack turned away, grabbed a beer from the fridge and leant against the doorframe, nodding towards the front door– effectively dismissing him.
“You … you and Sam…” it was as though a small light had turned on in his brain, or maybe he had finally found the link between A and B. “You love her!” Jack didn’t say anything, instead seemed to study the rim of his bottle intently. “Just … just like me and Sha’re!”
“No!” Jack barked, “Not like you and Sha’re. You did not kill the woman you-“ He closed his eyes and walked towards the door, throwing it open. Without looking outside, he threw a hand outside, “Go Daniel.”
Daniel’s eyes left Jack and moved to the figure standing in the doorway, her hands shoved in her pockets, biting her lip. “Listen to him Daniel.”
Jack swung around eyes wide open. “Carter?”
She didn’t look at him for a moment, instead keeping her eyes trained on Daniel. “Daniel, I’d like to talk to the Colonel for a bit please.”
Daniel didn’t need another warning he leapt out the door. He got about halfway down the path before turning back and looking through the window to the living room “Car-“
“This is a Sam and Jack conversation, Jack.” Then Sam reached up and lightly kissed Jack’s cheek.
Daniel turned and continued to his car. He wasn’t needed here anymore.
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]