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Story Notes: His and Hers 06: SERIES: 6th story in 'His and Hers' < www.geocities.com/bluetopazfic/index#hah >

Note: Thanks for Aud who beta-read this. The hiatus is over, at least for now it is. Aren't you glad? ;) You asked for more, and you will get more. Enjoy the story.

URL of this story (for better formatting):
www.geocities.com/bluetopazfic/hisandhers6.htm
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EMAIL: blue-topaz@lycos.com


His and Hers 06: His PlayStation and Her Bike


*Saturday, 12 July 2003*



08.32 : Sam Carter

Coast is clear.

You're free to leave Coburn's office, Sir.



08.33 : Jack O'Neill

Are you certain?



08.33 : Sam Carter

Yes.



08.33 : Jack O'Neill

Positive?



08.33 : Sam Carter

100% sure



08.33 : Jack O'Neill

Sure sure?



08.33 : Sam Carter

Sir, I've checked the Gate's log. That annoying Tok'ra and SG-9 have already departed early this morning. Apparently, Major Ewan wouldn't take any chances on General Hammond changing his mind. And for once, he had no objections from Captain Perry.



08.34 : Jack O'Neill

See, my plan works already.



08.34 : Sam Carter

Actually, Sir, they might just act civilly in front of General Hammond to avoid further 'punishment'. Who knows what they'll do the moment they step out the Gate.



08.34 : Jack O'Neill

Yeah, you’re right.

You know what, scratch that. I *hope* you are right. Imagine the havoc those two could cause in the Tok'ra headquarters.

Man, now I wish I was there.

No, wait! I *wish* I had a word with the rest of SG-9.

There, much better.



08.34 : Sam Carter

Well, they'll be a bit busy to have time to argue, Colonel. Moving out is a big job and it can be a nightmare too. I still remember when I had to move from DC to Colorado. Lets just say that breaking the laws of physics is a much easier task to do.



08.35 : Jack O'Neill

I guess I can see your point.

Hey, are you in the mess hall right now?



08.35 : Sam Carter

Yes.



08.35 : Jack O'Neill

Save me some fruit loops, I'll be there in ten minutes. I'm just going to my quarters first and freshen up a bit.



08.35 : Sam Carter

Will do.



***



14.55 : Jack O'Neill

Carter, what's your plan for this weekend?



14.55 : Sam Carter

I've had to finish the experiments in my lab, Sir. All of them should be done today, so I can spend my Sunday having a ride around town on my bike.



14.56 : Jack O'Neill

THE bike?



14.56 : Sam Carter

Yes, THE bike.



14.56 : Jack O'Neill

THE big cool shiny black bike that you had Siler fix for you?



14.56 : Sam Carter

That's the one.

And no, Sir, you cannot borrow him.



14.56 : Jack O'Neill

What makes you think that I'll borrow your bike?



14.56 : Sam Carter

The glint in your eyes when you first saw him was a dead give away, Colonel. You were practically licking your lips like a hungry cat that hadn't seen a bird in a long, long, long time. Why do you think I increased the security around my garage?



14.57 : Jack O'Neill

Garage? By garage, you mean one of the storage rooms on Level 6 that you turned into your 'private' garage?

And Carter, if you want to compare me with something, the least you could do is compare me with more manly animals (like a lion or a dragon), not some spoilt little creature, like a cat.



14.57 : Sam Carter

Yes, I meant that garage.

Sir, I like cats. They are not spoilt little creatures; they're intelligent, noble, and cute animals. I like cute things.

PS: A dragon is not an animal, Sir; it's mythical creature.

And for the record, Colonel, I think you’re cute.



14.57 : Jack O'Neill

Major, how many times have I told you that I forbid you to say that I'm cute? That is so uncool.

PS: A dragon is an animal, Major. Haven't you heard anything about the Komodo Dragon? It's real, not mythical.



14.57 : Sam Carter

But Sir, I'm not saying, I'm typing.

PS: My apologies, Sir. But if you want me to compare you with a reptile, who am I to protest?



14.58 : Jack O'Neill

You know, that reason is getting old.

OK, I forbid you to say AND type that I am cute.

There!

PS: As long as you don't think that a reptile is cute, you have no objections from me.



14.58 : Sam Carter

No saying and typing that you are cute. Got it.

PS: You were that desperate, Sir?



14.58 : Jack O'Neill

Carter! You're doing it again.

PS: I'm not desperate. I just want to drop this whole 'cute' subject. It gives me a creep.



14.58 : Sam Carter

Sorry, Sir. Definitely no more mentioning the fact that you are cute.

PS: A creep?



14.58 : Jack O'Neill

Major!



14.58 : Sam Carter

Yes, Sir?



14.58 : Jack O'Neill

Forget it.

I'm tired arguing like this. I should have known that I wouldn't get anywhere.



14.58 : Sam Carter

Aye, Sir. I can't remember a thing already.



14.58 : Jack O'Neill

You should learn to respect your elders more, you know that?



14.58 : Sam Carter

What do you mean, Sir? I am respectful to anyone who deserves it.



14.59 : Jack O'Neill

Are you saying that I don't deserve your respect?



14.59 : Sam Carter

Don't be ridiculous, Sir. Of course I respect you.



14.59 : Jack O'Neill

Oh yeah? I suppose that's why you've been making fun of me.



14.59 : Sam Carter

I'm making fun of you? Since when?



14.59 : Jack O'Neill

Carter!



14.59 : Sam Carter

Sorry, Sir. I couldn't resist it.



14.59 : Jack O'Neill

I'll forgive you, as long as you allow me to ride your bike.



14.59 : Sam Carter

Between my bike and your forgiveness, I'm afraid that I must choose my bike.

Nice try though, Sir.



15.00 : Jack O'Neill

Damn it!

Oh well, can't blame a guy for trying, can I?



15.00 : Sam Carter

It's nothing personal. I can't let anyone else ride him, Sir. Not even you. Sorry.



15.00 : Jack O'Neill

Selfish.



15.00 : Sam Carter

You don't let anyone else play on your PlayStation either, Sir.



15.00 : Jack O'Neill

It's different.



15.00 : Sam Carter

How is it different?



15.00 : Jack O'Neill

Any name other than mine in the top score list is not acceptable.



15.00 : Sam Carter

That just proves my point.



15.00 : Jack O'Neill

What point?



15.00 : Sam Carter

Never mind. I have to go, Sir. Someone had just entered my lab. I’ll talk to you later.



15.01 : Jack O'Neill

Carter? What point?



15.06 : Jack O'Neill

Carter? Are you there?



***



15.46 : Sam Carter

Sorry, Sir. But Dr. Felger had just come by my lab and was asking for some advice about a project that he was working on.



15.46 : Jack O'Neill

Felger? The geek who disobeyed my direct orders, TWICE?



15.46 : Sam Carter

That's him.



15.47 : Jack O'Neill

Carter, do me a favour.

Don't encourage him.



15.47 : Sam Carter

Don't encourage him to do what?



15.47 : Jack O'Neill

Don't play the innocent with me, Major. You know very well what I'm talking about. I could've sworn that he had the worst case of hero-worship I've ever encountered.



15.47 : Sam Carter

I think you are just peeved because he laid a hand on your dear PlayStation, Sir.



15.47 : Jack O'Neill

It's not true.

You, Daniel and Teal'c touched it too, but I don't have anything against you guys.



15.47 : Sam Carter

Yes, but we didn't drop it to the floor and break it.

Besides, how can you peeved at me? It was my hands that fixed the Playstation for you.



15.48 : Jack O'Neill

Yes, yes, genius. You don't have to rub that fact into my face. I remember it perfectly. Every time I turn it on, the screen says 'Welcome to Colonel Jonathan O'Neill's PlayStation. Proudly fixed by Major Samantha Carter' for about five seconds. You need a hobby, you know that.

BTW, what if one of us got promoted (or demoted)?



15.48 : Sam Carter

I have a hobby, Sir. Riding my bike and dismantling alien technology.

Besides, its called taking pride in my work.

If one of us got promoted (or demoted), I could always make an adjustment.



15.48 : Jack O'Neill

Yeah, yeah, whatever.

Hey, can I write something on your bike then?



15.48 : Sam Carter

Don't even think about it.



15.48 : Jack O'Neill

Can I slap a sticker on it, then?



15.48 : Sam Carter

Depends on what the sticker is, Sir.



15.48 : Jack O'Neill

SG-1's insignia. It'll look cool, I promise.



15.48 : Sam Carter

Well, that is acceptable. Although if someone asked what SG-1 is, I really don't know what to say. I need to think about it, Sir.



15.48 : Jack O'Neill

Oh come on! We could always make up something. Say that it was your secret society that you joined back in high school. No one would suspect anything. Or say that it stands for Sam's Gadget #1.



15.49 : Sam Carter

Sam's Gadget #1? How did you come up with this, Sir?



15.49 : Jack O'Neill

That’s for me to know and for you to find out.



15.49 : Sam Carter

Alright. I guess having a SG-1 sticker on my bike would look 'cool' after all.

Are you sure that we didn't break any rules, Sir? The SGC and everything that related to it is top secret after all.



15.49 : Jack O'Neill

Hey, you know me and rules.



15.49 : Sam Carter

Yeah, how I wish I don't though.



15.49 : Jack O'Neill

Now that’s sorted, can we talk about something else? Like when will we get the results from the shrink?



15.49 : Sam Carter

The shrink will received the edited version on Monday, Sir. If everything goes to plan, we'll have the results by Friday or by next Monday.



15.49 : Jack O'Neill

Are you going to send it to one shrink only?



15.49 : Sam Carter

Sir?



15.49 : Jack O'Neill

Well, I mean to avoid any foul play. Don't you think we should get a second or third opinion?



15.50 : Sam Carter

Good point. But this is only a test; I think we could afford 'foul play'. Besides, the only ones that would read the results are just General Hammond and myself.



15.50 : Jack O'Neill

Excuse me? You and Hammond?

What about me?



15.50 : Sam Carter

Er, to be honest, Sir, we (the General and I) think that it will depend on what the shrink said. We know how strongly you feel about shrinks, so we couldn't risk you having a go at the shrink (if the results didn’t please you). And yes Sir, we know that you could get his/her name even though we didn't tell you. You are a very resourceful individual.



15.50 : Jack O'Neill

I'm glad to see that the two of you have such faith in me.



15.50 : Sam Carter

Anyway Sir, I have to go and do my job. I want to take care of everything so that I won't have to come to the SGC tomorrow.



15.50 : Jack O'Neill

OK. You have fun doing your job.



15.50 : Sam Carter

I will. Thanks.



***



20.07 : Sam Carter

Sir, Daniel was just questioning me during dinner. He was concerned about you. He said that you were spending too much time with your Palm. You seem to be neglecting your GameBoy, PlayStation and yo-yo lately.



20.08 : Jack O'Neill

Hey, it was your fault.

You installed some cool games in the Palm.



20.08 : Sam Carter

It was only Solitaire, Minesweepers and PinBall.



20.08 : Jack O'Neill

Well, it's addictive.



20.08 : Sam Carter

Anyway Sir, I just want to let you know that you had better be a little discreet with it. Or else, the others will find out about this journal. And I'm quite sure that you didn't want *that* to happen.

I told Daniel that I did you a favour and made the Palm a lot more interesting than just a normal one. And I also told him that this is just a phase; you will come out of it, eventually.



20.08 : Jack O'Neill

Phase? Don't you think I'm a bit too old to go through a phase?



20.08 : Sam Carter

Well, to be honest ... no.

Anyway, if you can bring the Palm to my lab now, I'll do some upgrades and install some more programs on it, so that if Daniel decides to play detective, he'll find nothing suspicious.



20.09 : Jack O'Neill

This upgrading thingy won't erase the memory inside the Palm, will it?



20.09 : Sam Carter

Don't worry, Colonel. All the high scores that you have so far won't be erased. I'm not that cruel.



20.09 : Jack O'Neill

Sure you're not that cruel. You're a lot more than cruel - you're sadistic.



20.09 : Sam Carter

Thank you. You think too highly about me, Sir.



20.09 : Jack O'Neill

Carter, that's not a compliment.



20.09 : Sam Carter

It's not? Oh well, I’ll take it as one anyway.



20.09 : Jack O'Neill

Someday, Major, someday, I'll make you speechless. Just watch it.



20.09 : Sam Carter

I'll be waiting.



20.10 : Jack O'Neill

I'm coming to your lab now.



***



23.34 : Jack O'Neill

Hey, where are you?



23.35 : Sam Carter

My house, Sir. I'm just preparing to go to sleep. My bike and I have a big day tomorrow. What about you, what are you going to do tomorrow?



23.35 : Jack O'Neill

I don't know, maybe I'll just go harassing Daniel.



23.35 : Sam Carter

Sir?



23.35 : Jack O'Neill

Daniel is being too nosey for his own good.



23.35 : Sam Carter

What has he done now?



23.35 : Jack O'Neill

He wanted to borrow my Palm, saying that he didn't understand why I spend so much time with it.



23.35 : Sam Carter

Ah. And did you lend it to him?



23.35 : Jack O'Neill

Yes, for about ten minutes. But afterwards, I made him promise not to play any games on it.



23.36 : Sam Carter

What about the journal?



23.36 : Jack O'Neill

Don't worry. I wasn't logged in at that moment, and I'm pretty sure that Daniel doesn't know the password.



23.36 : Sam Carter

And what did Daniel say after that?



23.36 : Jack O'Neill

He asked me where I got it. So I said that you gave it to me, as it was a prototype of a communication device that all SG-team members will soon have.



23.36 : Sam Carter

And he believed you?



23.36 : Jack O'Neill

Well, he said he did, but I know better. He knew something was up. Like I said, he is too nosey for his own good.

I wonder if we could lock him in a closet with the Doc. That ought to teach him a lesson.



23.36 : Sam Carter

Are you sure you want to face the wrath of Janet, Sir?



23.37 : Jack O'Neill

Well, she wouldn't know who did it, would she? And you better not turn into a traitor this time, Major.



23.36 : Sam Carter

I don't have to. There's only a handful of people who dare to do that to her. And I'm pretty sure that your name is at the top of the list.



23.37 : Jack O'Neill

I could make it look like an accident.



23.37 : Sam Carter

No offence, Sir, but even if Daniel didn't realise it was your doing, Janet would see through it. She has a third eye for things like this, being a parent *and* a Doctor.



23.37 : Jack O'Neill

You're right. I have to have a partner in crime. Someone who would give me an alibi and it has to be someone trustworthy. Someone Janet trusts.



23.37 : Sam Carter

Er, Sir, I was trying to put you off, not giving you an advice.



23.37 : Jack O'Neill

Don't worry, Carter, even if I do get caught, your name won't came up.



23.37 : Sam Carter

Sir, that's not what I meant.



23.38 : Jack O'Neill

Whatever. Hey, can you think of someone who will fit the criteria? Ferretti is definitely not an option; Janet doesn't trust him, any more than she trusts me. Teal'c, well, it's going to be a pain to explain this to him, and I'm quite sure that he will deliberately screw it up somehow. But being the devious alien that he is, he will pretend to know nothing about it. Coburn is off-world, I couldn't ask him.

Any suggestions?



23.38 : Sam Carter

No way, I'm not going to be involved in this. You can forget about it.



23.38 : Jack O'Neill

Come on, Carter. Why can't you just do this one tiny weenie little favour for me?



23.38 : Sam Carter

Janet's wrath is not worth it. Sorry Sir, but you’re all alone in this.



23.38 : Jack O'Neill

Carter, you better help me, or your bike will suffer the consequences.



23.38 : Sam Carter

Hey, leave my bike out of this.



23.38 : Jack O'Neill

You said it yourself; I'm a very resourceful individual. What makes you think that I couldn't do my best and get my hand on your precious bike?



23.38 : Sam Carter

Colonel, you wouldn't dare!



23.39 : Jack O'Neill

Wouldn't I?



23.39 : Sam Carter

Colonel O'Neill, please, this is so unfair.



23.39 : Jack O'Neill

More unfair than you making fun of my life?



23.39 : Sam Carter

But I never use blackmail against you.



23.39 : Jack O'Neill

Not all blackmail has to be said aloud.



23.39 : Sam Carter

Sir? Don't make me choose between my bike and Janet. You wouldn't if you had to choose between Daniel and your GameBoy as well.



23.39 : Jack O'Neill

What are you talking about? Of course I choose my GameBoy. Daniel can take care of himself. As can Janet.



23.39 : Sam Carter

Fine, fine. I’ll help you.

Ask Dr. Felger, he would do anything for you.



23.40 : Jack O'Neill

Carter. Anyone but him.

I don't want to owe him anything.



23.40 : Sam Carter

Siler then. Janet has a soft spot for him, he is a regular visitor to the infirmary and unlike you, Sir, he is not a difficult patient.



23.40 : Jack O'Neill

Good choice. Thanks Carter.

Are you sure that you don't want to take credit on this? I’ll pull it off with class, I promise.



23.40 : Sam Carter

I pass, Sir.

And please, be gentle with Daniel; he has just got his memory back.



23.40 : Jack O'Neill

Don't worry. I won't overdo things, much.



23.40 : Sam Carter

I'll deny all knowledge about this scheme of yours.



23.40 : Jack O'Neill

You do that.



23.40 : Sam Carter

And remember, no credit whatsoever.



23.41 : Jack O'Neill

No worries. Have a great Sunday, Carter.



23.41 : Sam Carter

Thanks Sir, and try not to have too much fun with Daniel and Janet.



23.41 : Jack O'Neill

I'll try, but I'm not promising anything.



23.41 : Sam Carter

Oh yeah, I'm going out for the whole day tomorrow, and I won't bring my Palm with me, thus no journal. But I'll have my cell phone and beeper with me, just in case.



23.41 : Jack O'Neill

OK, you have fun with your bike, I'll have fun with Daniel.



23.41 : Sam Carter

Night, Sir.



23.42 : Jack O'Neill

Goodnight, Carter. Sleep well.



***



End Notes: Note: So, because SG-9 is off-world, I need to think of a new storyline. And Daniel is just right over there, I hope you don't mind. The next will be 'His Plan and Her Project', Sam was a little bit worry.

PS: I'm still waiting for your bloopers, people. :) Some people already send theirs (I love you guys), so there's no reason why you shouldn't.

blue-topaz@lycos.com
http://fly.to/bluetopazfic/

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