samandjack.net

Story Notes: E-mail: lisayaeger@hotmail.com

Pairings: Sam/Jack

Season/sequel: This happens in season 7 after Sam starts dating some guy.

Spoilers: Minor ones for 100 Days, Abyss, Meta, Solitude, Beneath the Surface, Full Circle

Feedback: Welcomed!

Date: 26-3-2003

Author's Notes: This is the way it *won't* happen if TPTB do a BWC ep. Thanks to Moon for her continued support, late into the night. And to Sally Murphy for having a shippy heart.


It had been her move for over 10 minutes. She really didn't know what to do. That her mind was only half-occupied with the chess game in front of her wasn't really helping matters.

"It's your move." Cassie was clearly getting tired of waiting even though her own moves often took up to three times as long.

"I know, I know. Give me a minute." She had to concentrate.

Concentrating was a task that she hadn't been very good at the past few weeks. Since her first date with Greg. They had met in a coffee shop of all places. They had ordered the same thing, and when it was called out at the counter, they had both reached for it at the same time. He did the gentlemanly thing, of course, and let her have it. In exchange for her number. She realized she was smiling like a moron just remembering the event, and Cassie must have noticed.

"So, how come you're not with Greg tonight?"

What did that mean? Okay, so they had been out every Friday and Saturday for the last month. No big deal. It was always exciting in the beginning wasn't it? The first touches, the first time holding hands, the first time kissing, the first time making out, and she hoped the first time for other things as well, although they hadn't quite gotten to that point yet. Not that he hadn't wanted to. Not that *she* hadn't wanted to. But, it had been a long time for her, and he hadn't been with anyone since his divorce nearly four years ago, so they had agreed to wait until they were both comfortable. Needless to say, Greg was an attractive man, and the idea of sleeping with him was quite enticing. Wait- Cassie had asked her something- Oh! Right. Greg. Big smile. "He had an emergency." Such was the life of a doctor. A pediatrician no less. He loved kids, and wanted a few of his own. Something his ex- wife didn't, and apparently forgot to mention before they got married. At any rate, it was something he and Sam agreed on. One of many things they saw eye-to-eye on.

"Are you going to marry him?" Cassie had given up waiting for Sam to move and had started flipping through the latest issue of some teen magazine that had dozens of prom dresses featured inside.

Marriage. Now that was a word that had popped into her head more than a few times since they had discussed his divorce, his desire for children. Her desire for children, their common interests. Their mutual physical attraction. They were a perfect match in so many ways, it was inevitable that the "M" word would flash in front of her eyes, wasn't it? "It's not like he's asked me. I mean we've only been dating a month."

"But you love him?"

Inquisitive little bugger, wasn't she? Love. The simplest of words with the most complicated meanings. She loved Cassie. Her dad. Her brother. Her friends. Her teammates. But Greg? Maybe. And probably in time she would grow to love him. She really had a feeling he could be *the one*. "Maybe."

Cassie tossed aside the magazine and dove for the bag of chips on the coffee table. Resting her back against the couch, she studied Sam studying the chess board. "Would you leave the SGC?"

Sam's head popped up as if Cassie had just spoken an alien language. Not an unrealistic possibility given her background, but still. "Why would you think that?"

Cassie shrugged. Her fingers playing with the crumbs at the bottom of the bag. "I guess I just figured that if you guys got together then you would probably have kids one day."

As far as Sam was concerned, Cassie was making a non-sequitur. Where on earth was she coming up with this? "What does that have to do with my leaving the SGC?"

"Sam." Cassie gave her one of those looks that said Sam was clearly missing the obvious. "You've told me before how important family is to you."

"And?" She pushed the chess board aside, intrigued by Cassie's line of thinking.

"Aaaaaannnd, you've said how you don't want to miss out on anything that happens while your kids are growing up."

Because of her mom. Sam had at least learned the lesson that the time parents and children had together was too short. She wasn't going to be a full-time working mother. Not that she didn't want some intellectual stimulation, but it would have to take a back seat to raising a family. Something else she and Greg agreed on. "So?"

"So, I just figured that if you and Greg are serious, and one thing leads to another…"

"Cassie, I swear Janet has been letting you read those Danielle Steele novels again. Look, we've been dating a month. Yes, we've talked about the future, but I'm not engaged, we're not getting married, and I'm certainly not pregnant." Her voice rose a little louder than she wanted. She could feel her face getting flushed, and turned her attention back to the board.

"Okay, okay." She dropped the empty bag of chips to the floor. "Sorry."

Sam sighed. She wasn't angry with Cassie, really. She had just pointed out the logical course of events. Sam had always intended to leave SG-1, if not the SGC, before even trying to get pregnant. No way was she risking the health of her baby for a job, no matter how important it was. She could contribute in other ways. By teaching at the Academy. By writing and doing research. Things that didn't require her to come into contact with alien entities or technology. So why had she grown so defensive? She felt vulnerable all of a sudden, and she didn't know why. It was unnerving her, and so she reached for the bottle of wine on the table and poured herself a fresh glass.

Cassie stared at her hands, folded neatly in her lap. She cautiously voiced another question, "Sam?"

"Yeah?" Her voice sounded weary and wary. Very unlike Sam Carter.

"Don't you love Jack?" Cassie sat motionless. Barely breathing.

Her mind raced at a million miles a minute. Hyper-drive was slower. Did she love Jack. The honest answer was yes. Of course she did. She loved all of her team and their extended "family." But that's not what Cassie was asking. Sam wasn't sure which way to react- with shock and surprise that Cassie could even suggest such a thing or with the deliberate vagueness that she always used when the subject of her feelings for her CO was brought up. Usually by Janet. The problem was, Cassie would see through her either way. Just like Janet. So, rather than lie, she just didn't answer and moved the chess board so it was directly in front of her again.

Not deterred, Cassie continued, "I mean, it's just that if you plan on leaving your job someday anyway, why not now? Why couldn't you just quit and start dating him instead?"

She couldn't lift her eyes to meet the brown ones she felt looking at her. Definitely reading romance novels. And apparently talking to Janet some about the frat rules. She was really going to have to thank Janet for that later. "It's not that simple."

"Why?"

Why? There were a hundred reasons why. And as soon as she thought of one, she was going to say it out loud. Yep. Any minute now. She was just going to leap to her feet and tell Cassie she was crazy. That the idea was ridiculous. Leave her job to start dating her CO. That had to be the most absurd reason to quit ever. And not something Major Carter would even consider. Leaving a job she had worked so hard far, effectively ending her military career, and all for a chance at… what?! A few good times? A few nice dinners? Maybe a roll in the hay? A couple of laughs. Okay, okay, it would turn into a bunch of laughs, and probably the best sex of her life. And everyone knew that the Colonel could cook, so really it was just about… What was it about again? That she didn't love him. No, that wasn't it. That he didn't love her. Well, she couldn't be sure, but she was fairly certain that wasn't it either. In fact, the faster her brain worked, the harder her heart beat. The faster her blood started pumping. And a feeling that she couldn't quite describe rose from the bottom of her stomach and into her chest. Oh no, wait- she remembered that feeling!! It was from Antarctica, and Edora, and behind the force field, and as Thera. It was in Nirrti's cell and even a little on Abydos. It was love. Pure and simple. The kind that had already grown beyond the confines of her heart. The kind she could never feel for anyone else. Not even someone as perfect a match as Greg. She finally looked up at Cassie with eyes brimming with tears. "Why not?" She smiled through the drops that slowly and silently crept down her face as she raised her body off the floor. She left the chess board as it was on the table, never having made her move.

With a smile of her own, Cassie found Sam's coat and purse and keys. She hugged her tightly and then walked her to the door. "So, you're heading home?"

Sam sniffled and brought a tissue out of her jacket pocket to wipe her nose, "Yeah, I have a couple of calls to make."

"Maybe we can finish the game next week?"

Sam jingled the keys in her hand, searching for the one to her car. "I think I might have a date."

"Anyone I know?" Her playful tone wasn't missed by Sam.

"Just a guy." Sam opened the door and started walking out onto the porch, but turned around to find one smug looking teenage girl looking back at her. "He used to be my boss."



End Notes: Love it or leave it, but send me feedback if you've gotten this far- lisayaeger@hotmail.com

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