"Seasons 4: An Early Summer Storm" by Carol S. Comer

Title: An Early Summer Storm.

Author: Carol S. Comer

Status: complete

Category: SJR, angst

Spoilers: 100 Days, Shades of Grey

Season/Sequel info: 3rd Season - events in this story occur during the situation depicted in the episode Shades of Grey. Sequel to "Through the Bitter, Bitter Cold," "The Coming of Spring" and "All Things New."

Rating: PG-13

Content Warnings: Language. Suggestion of adult consensual relations.

Summary: On the heels of Edora, Sam faces Jack's dismissal from the SGC.

Disclaimer: Every legal document should include some Latin, i.e. a priori, res judicata, etc. Therefore I have decided to do this disclaimer in Latin - pig latin that is. Ese-they aracter-kays are the operty-pray of argate-stay (II) oduction-prays, owtime-shay/iacom-vay, MGM/UA, ouble-day ecret-say oduction-prays, and ekko-gay oduction-prays. Borrowed without permission (usually known as stealing). No infringement intended. No money made. No real assets. No reason to sue me. No life. No Zoloft left. Well, you get the no's here.

Author's Notes: There's a light at the end of the tunnel. Every cloud has a silver lining. Its always darkest before the dawn and all those other cliches. This one's gonna hurt, but I promise the next will be better. Here it is. Don't hate me. Installment number 4 - WAY earlier than promised. The really perverse thing is - this was sooo much easier for me to write than the shiny, happy stories (as if you've ever actually seen a shiny happy story from me). I torture small animals and fictional characters for fun and entertainment.

AN EARLY SUMMER STORM

He awoke tangled in her blankets, an arm draped across her back and a leg wedged possessively between her knees. Jack pulled Sam tight and nuzzled her hair. She snuggled closer in semi-sleep, sighing contentedly.

Sam opened her eyes slowly and rolled over looking around. When she felt the Colonel's hand on her stomach she stiffened and moved away awkwardly.

"Colonel... Sir." She said uncomfortably pulling the blankets up over her exposed flesh. Sam's eyes wrinkled with confusion and concern.

"Colonel?" He mocked her lightly. "Sir?" His left eyebrow raised in amusement until he looked closely and could see the hints of regret already shadowing her face.

"Sam?" He called to her and hesitantly reached out for her shoulder. Sam frowned uncertainly. When she didn't move into his arms, Jack closed his eyes in disappointment. "Oh, Sam." He sighed.

Jack sat up and cleared his throat. "Well, I suppose if you're feeling better, I should leave then." He said. Sam gave him a relieved nod. She was looking in his general direction, but wouldn't look up to meet his eyes, staring just about chest level. "Well, then." Jack said carefully separating the bedspread from the blankets beneath and wrapping it around his waist before sitting up and moving off her bed. "I'll just be on my way." The Colonel was trying to shield Sam's delicate sensibilities from the full expanse of his nakedness if she was already having second thoughts about what had happened the night before. "I'll see you at the briefing, Major." Jack said as he backed out of her bedroom scooping up pieces of clothing off the floor as he went. Sam sat up, carefully pulling the blankets up to her chest, and watched him leave.

"Damn." She swore and fell back onto the mattress in disgust. 'What the hell is wrong with me?' She thought. She pushed back the blankets covering her and crawled out of bed. Sam wanted to shower and get into the compound early so that she could talk to the colonel before their briefing - she had a lot of explaining to do and maybe a little apologizing was in order.

It was early when Sam arrived at the Cheyenne Mountain complex, but Jack had beat her in. She wasn't surprised. The colonel never did sleep much, but whether it was from habit, training or genetics, Sam didn't know. She tapped lightly on the frame as she pushed the door opened and peeked shyly around the corner. Jack waved her in and Sam shut the door behind her.

"Sam, are you okay?" Jack asked, the concern evident in his voice.

"Yes, sir." She said. "I'm fine. I just needed some time to think about what happened." She looked around nervously. "NEED some time." She corrected herself. "There's so much about us that makes this complicated." Jack nodded in understanding. "I mean, I wanted it to happen." She said. "I'm just not sure I'm ready to deal with all the consequences of it."

"I see." He said without judgment.

"I don't regret what happened." Sam added quickly gesturing between the two of them. "I'm just not sure I'm ready for my relationship with you to get so complicated."

"Well major," The Colonel reassured her as he approached cautiously. "We're both adults. We can go on working together as if last night had never happened." He said looking deep in her eyes. "You won't hurt my feelings if you decide this isn't what you want." Sam gave him a grateful smile.

"I just wasn't thinking last night." She said still trying to explain.

"Well, that's a first." The Colonel responded lightly and gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. "I've got to meet with General Hammond, but I'll see you at 0900 hours for the briefing." He said. "Are WE alright?" Jack asked. Sam smiled and nodded yes. "Good."

When Sam arrived for the briefing several hours later, the Colonel and General Hammond were already in the briefing room. She said "good morning" to her superior officers but they both appeared distracted. She fervently hoped it had nothing to do with her.

Daniel and Teal'c arrived just before the appointed time and the meeting began ahead of schedule. SG1 was tasked with returning to Tollana and negotiating a trade for Tollan weapons technology. The Colonel was strangely quiet during the briefing and Sam worried once again that she was the reason.

When the Major heard the purpose of their mission, Sam was a little surprised that the diplomatic and negotiations team wasn't being handed this assignment, but the 'official' explanation was: since SG1 was the team that saved the Tollan people from destruction by the Goa'uld, SG1 should be the team to present the SGC's position. Sam looked at the Colonel to see if he agreed, but he stared straight ahead rigid and formal.

After the briefing concluded, Daniel spent the remainder of the morning preparing his argument and cursing his lack of legal training. When Sam heard that she laughed at the ludicrous nature of the suggestion. "Can you imagine?" She asked him. "An entire team of intergalactic lawyers? Yuck!" Sam was already outfitted in her dress blues and had come to retrieve the archeologist who was delaying changing into a suit as long as possible to read as much legal precedent as he could squeeze in before departing. It was like he was cramming for an exam. "Daniel, we have GOT to go now." She said. "Teal'c and the Colonel are already in the gateroom." At that Daniel sighed in frustration and closed the text on military justice.

But Daniel's preparation was for naught. High Chancellor Travelle had refused all SG1 requests for a technology exchange reminding the team repeatedly that it was strictly forbidden under Tollan law. Daniel was barely permitted to deliver ANY of the arguments that he had prepared. Finally, the Colonel lost his patience and uncharacteristically lashed out at the Tollan representative. "Forget it." Jack told her curtly. "We knew you wouldn't give us anything. We're wasting a lot of time here." Daniel tried to calm him, but Jack wouldn't hear it. "No Daniel, Let's go."

The members of SG1 filed out of the hearing chambers following the Colonel. He was walking so briskly in anger that Sam had to run in her heels to keep up with him. Now she was sure his behavior was because of her.

On the way out of the Tollan facility, the Colonel stopped, looked around for witnesses and, seeing none, removed the Tollan technology that had disabled their weapons on the previous mission. Sam gaped in horror. What he was doing was illegal, immoral and, considering the technologically superior nature of the Tollan culture, just plain stupid. She couldn't fathom why the Colonel would steal the weapons technology.

Sam could understand the colonel lashing out at anything and everything in anger. That would be in character for him, but he hadn't seemed particularly hurt or upset by her earlier. She was perplexed. Sam was disappointed in him as a friend and a superior office and, more than that, she was mortified to be part of his criminal actions.

The debriefing was particularly painful as the full extent of the Colonel's illegal activities came to light. Sam was nearly put in the position of having to choose between betraying the colonel or concealing his crime, but she was spared the pain of choosing when the Colonel interrupted General Hammond's questioning and admitted that he had taken the device. The General understandably reacted with shock at Colonel O'Neill's announcement and the confrontation between the two soldiers grew increasingly hostile.

Sam shifted uncomfortably in her seat. This was so wrong. She wanted to speak up and admit it was all her fault. If she hadn't been so vulnerable last night and asked him to stay, or if she hadn't been so scared this morning and asked him to leave, the Colonel wouldn't be acting like this now.

"Colonel O'Neill, I am hereby relieving you of your command. You are to report to the infirmary and stay there until I send for you." Sam looked up sharply, but the Colonel avoided her eyes. He and the General continued their verbal exchange and when he was ordered to submit to medical testing, Jack simply rose from his chair glaring at the General and left the room, Teal'c in tow.

The Major was delayed by the unannounced visit from the High Chancellor, but as soon as she was able to escape, Sam sought the Colonel to work things out between them. She found the Colonel walking back from the infirmary with Teal'c.

"Carter." The Colonel acknowledged with a nod but continued down the corridor, barely slowing.

"Sir?" She called cautiously. He stopped and turned around impatiently.

"What?" He replied coldly.

"Is there anything I can do?" She asked haltingly - the confusion was evident on her face. 'Tell me what's going on here.' Her eyes pleaded.

"About...?"

"Well, sir, with respect, you aren't exactly acting like yourself."

"No, Carter. I haven't been acting like myself since I met you." The Colonel sneered. "NOW I'm acting like myself." He spared her a quick glance and strode off purposefully without a backward glance. Teal'c paused a moment before following the Colonel toward Hammond's office.

Sam stood speechless in the corridor. The Colonel's comments confirmed what she already suspected - it was all her fault.

Colonel O'Neill met with General Hammond and was offered court martial or early retirement. Jack opted for retirement and left the facility without a word to Sam.

Sam was still reeling from the debriefing and her meeting with Jack in the hallway. She fled to her quarters and waited for the colonel to come explain. Hours passed and finally a knock came at her door. She opened the door with relief only to find Daniel nervously fidgeting in the hallway.

"Where's the Colonel?" She asked unceremoniously.

"He left." Daniel replied stepping into the dim, gray room and shutting the door behind him. "Jack chose to take early retirement rather than face court martial for his actions." Sam gulped reflexively. Her throat was constricting in pain and her brain was screaming for more oxygen. 'This can't be real.' She thought to herself.

"Someone's got to go talk to him." Daniel said.

"I can't." Sam responded quickly. "I can't do this again. First Edora and then this. I... I..." The major was almost hyperventilating. Daniel gently led her to her desk chair and she sat down automatically lowering her head between her knees. Daniel soothingly ran a hand across her back. "I just can't fight him anymore." She said, her voice muffled in her lap. "Its just too hard."

"I'll go, Sam." Daniel told her. "You just stay here and rest." He said. "You're probably still run down from the last four months." Sam looked up and smiled gratefully. She promised to try to sleep, but they both knew it was a lie. The best she could do was lay in her bed and stared at the ceiling.

The following morning, Daniel made the trip out to the O'Neill household. He returned sullen and quiet. Daniel never spoke of what had been said between him and Jack that day and Sam never asked - she didn't need any more bad news.

A restless and uncomfortable week passed. Sam had fallen back into her old habit of wandering the base corridors in the wee hours of the morning. Even when she did sleep, she slept restlessly, keeping one ear open for the phone to ring. Sam always expected - to the very end - that the Colonel would try to explain to her what had happened. She never got that call.

A week later, SG1 was recalled to active duty and Colonel Makepeace was reassigned to lead the team. Sam should have been disappointed that she wasn't given that position, but she was too tired to care. Daniel, on the other hand, took great offense to the assignment.

But SG1 went on - life went on - without Jack O'Neill. The team performed its tasks efficiently, effectively, but completely without heart. Daniel was distant and sullen. Sam was exhausted and emotional drained and Makepeace simply was not Jack. Only Teal'c seemed unaffected by the changes.

Two weeks in to SG1's return to duty, word filtered up from command that Jack was back on base. Sam wasn't in the General's office when Jack requested that Hammond permit him to return to Edora, but it didn't take long for her to hear it through the base grapevine. Colonel Makepeace had been in a meeting with General Hammond when Jack interrupted, so he had carried the news back to SG1 almost immediately. Sam's knees nearly buckled under her when she heard and she fled the commissary in search of the Colonel. She caught up with him heading back up to the surface.

"Colonel?" She asked, the question evident in her greeting.

"Major." He nodded briskly. Jack was uncharacteristically still as he faced her, looking straight and unblinkingly into Sam's eyes.

"Well. Um." Sam, in contrast, danced nervously from foot to foot and had a hard time maintaining eye contact. "I heard the news about you going back to Edora." She said, cocking her head and frowning.

"Sweet little grapevine we have here." He mumbled angrily. The elevator opened and closed again, but Jack didn't leave. Sam watched the doors slide shut, her real question, 'Why?' remained unspoken.

"Yes, well." He told her. "I've decided to go back to Edora to be with Lara."

"Sir?" She questioned. Sam wanted to ask 'what about us?' but she hadn't acknowledged that an 'us' even existed. That was the problem.

"I guess I want more from a relationship than you seem willing to offer." Jack said cruelly as he hit the up button for the elevator again. Sam's blood ran cold. Had she been paying attention to him rather than focusing on the wrenching tear in her heart, Sam would have seen the grief and regret flash in his eyes as he wielded his verbal sword.

When Sam didn't move, Jack turned back toward the elevator door. A moment later, She grabbed his arm for attention. He looked back sighing with exaggerated irritation.

"But you said you didn't love her." She reminded him edgily. Jack took a deep breath and exhaled loudly.

"I told you I could learn to love her." He said, forcibly removing her hand from his arm. "Which is more than I can say about you." Sam sucked in sharply like she had been struck in the stomach. The elevator chimed again, yet they stood staring each other down like circling animals. "Can I go now?" Jack asked impatiently as he stuck an arm in the doorframe to hold the elevator open.

"Fine. Go." She hissed. It was all she could do not to slap him. Sam turned on her heels and fled down the hallway. She missed Jack drop heavily against the wall of the elevator and close his eyes in pain as the elevator doors closed.

The following day, Sam gathered with General Hammond, Janet and Teal'c to see the (ex) Colonel off. Part of her was reluctant to join them in the gateroom after everything that was said between her and the colonel the day before, but Sam knew this would be her last chance to see the man who used to be her friend, her commanding officer and had almost been something so much more.

Daniel, however, flatly refused to join them in the gateroom, opting to watch Jack's departure from control. He hadn't told Sam what had happened when he went to speak with Jack at his house. Then again, she hadn't told Daniel what Jack had said to her in the corridor the day before either. Some things were best left unsaid.

Sam stood next to the General, keeping her eyes sharp on Jack hoping that he would turn to look at her. 'Give me something.' She silently pleaded. 'Tell me why, please.' Jack walked by without a glance. He mounted the stairs with his bag in hand and approached the event horizon. This was it. They would never see Jack again.

'Stop.' she begged him in her mind. 'Don't do this.'

"Colonel." The General called. Jack stopped without turning and General Hammond saluted him from behind out of respect for the soldier Jack once was. Sam, Janet and the Marines in the gateroom followed suit.

Jack paused for a moment and looked at his feet as if he had changed his mind, but then he raised his head and focused his eyes forward and disappeared through the ring without looking back.

'No, Jack, please. Don't leave me like this.' Her mind shouted and the dark clouds gathered and the wind rose. It was an early summer storm.

The End.