"Promise Kept" by Ruth M King

TITLE: Promise Kept

RATING: PG

ARCHIVE: Sam and Jack and Heliopolis. Anyone else please ask :)

SPOILERS: 100 Days

DISCLAIMERS: Stargate SG1 is the property of MGM, Showtime, Double Secret and Gekko etc. I'm just playing for a while !

NOTES: This is a sequel to my story Promise. Lara dies in childbirth etc...... The song I quote from is by The October Project and is used without permission.

***

What do you do when the man you love finds someone else? What can you really do? You work with him, you respect him and you don't want any of that to change. So, what do you do?

You carry on as if nothing had ever happened. You laugh at his jokes, help him out when he needs it, do things for him. You hate yourself....but you can't change. After all, you still love him.

Does he know? Probably not. Do you care? More than he'll ever know. Has he been with that other woman.....you won't even ask him.

If it wasn't for little Samantha...... The baby gurgles at me and smiles. The colonel places his hand on my shoulder and we watch her for a while. She's got the cutest blonde hair and I think her eyes will stay blue. In fact, people who don't know would swear that she's my daughter.

"You sure you're going to be OK?" he asks me.

This is the first time he's left her overnight and I can tell that he's worried, but I don't think it'll be enough to make him stay. He's been planning this trip for the past week. Although why he thinks trailer trash Barbie will appreciate camping in the mountains I'm not quite sure. She's not really the woodsy type. I allow myself an evil laugh. Someone neglected to tell her that she really should have broken in her hiking boots. She's going to have really sore feet. HA! The colonel considers ten miles a short walk in the woods....that's assuming they ever get to the hiking part.

I mean what does he see in her? I suppose she's attractive....in a way. In an 'I'm a poor defenceless female, please protect me', way. She makes me want to vomit. It's just the way she pretends to agree with everything he says....even though I'm certain that she doesn't understand half of it. I know for a fact that I'm exactly two hundred and thirty times smarter than she is. Perhaps that's why the colonel likes her so much. He doesn't feel intimidated. And she laughs at his jokes...OK so I do that too, but I actually think they're funny. I'm not doing it just because I see him as a good catch. She's younger than me as well. Which makes him way too old for her.

The colonel has obviously fallen for her act in a big way. If I didn't know better I'd say that he was in love with the...... Ahhh....little Samantha's smiling at me. She's a good girl. She throws up every time trailer trash Barbie holds her. I suppose I should stop calling her that, or one day I might do it to her face. What is her real name anyway?

I pick Samantha up in my arms and take her to the door so she can wave goodbye to her daddy. The bastard. The colonel looks back at us. I think I see him hesitate, but it's probably just wishful thinking. Why should he? I'm only his 2IC. At one time I hoped I was something more, but the past few weeks have eroded that certainty. Ever since Ferretti introduced him to she who has brutally over applied cosmetics. I bet she has to use a hammer a chisel to take it off at night. Maybe she is a Barbie Doll? Her chest is certainly big enough and there's probably enough plastic in her body...... Maybe if I wore my wonderbra.....or that tank top number he likes so much. But who am I kidding? I just don't have what she's got....whatever that might be.

His car pulls out of the drive and I'm left here, holding the baby. His child. Not mine. However much I like to pretend, I never feel like anything more than the sitter. Someone to ease his conscience while he has fun with Miss Silicone Implant 1998. She should have had liposuction on her stomach while she was at it. I smile to herself, mine is definitely flatter. Which makes all those crunches worth the effort. Besides, I get to work out with the Colonel and stare at him in his shorts and vest. A very sweaty vest I might add. Shaking myself out of my daydream I take little Samantha back into the house. Maybe Barbie will die or something. She looks the type who would faint at the first sight of something squidgy. Bet the colonel would never ask her to sleep on the ground. In the rain, in the mud....oh....mustn't forget the snow and ice!

Samantha is fretting a little. She doesn't like the fact that her daddy had gone away. I put some music on, hoping to calm her down.

I'll be OK sweet one. Daddy'll be back.

Deep as you go I'll follow
Deep as the water goes
All the world is hollow and dry
But you and I go down
You and I go down........

I sing the words of the song to her.

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I hope Sam's going to be all right. I mean I know she's looked after little Samantha before, but never for a whole night. What'll she do if she won't stop crying? Did I leave enough formula? What if Samantha gets sick? Sam's great an' all, but she hasn't been a parent before and she may not recognise the signs. I'll just pull over and call her.

"Sam, it's me."

"Colonel, you've only been gone an hour."

Sam's voice holds a hint of amusement.

"I just wanted to check on...stuff."

"Both stuff and myself are fine."

"Good, that's good. Put her on for a second."

"Samantha come and gurgle at Daddy."

My little girl laughs at me down the phone. She's probably thinking that I'm being dumb. Maybe I am, but it's not against the law for me to worry about her.

"Anything else, sir?"

"No, I'll see you tomorrow, Carter."

I hang up and start to pull back onto the road.....then I stop. Why do I get the feeling that I'm about to do something incredibly stupid? I'm supposed to be picking Sharon up in half an hour. If I hesitate much longer I'm gonna be late. I'm thinkin' too much. Something I'm not usually guilty of. Enough thinking, it's time to go. I stick a tape into the player, hoping to take my mind off my baby. At first I don't recognise the music.....it ain't one of mine. Then I remember. Sam made up this tape. She told me that she wasn't going to listen to opera for six hours non-stop. We argued a bit about that.

We took little Samantha into the mountains for her first ski trip. OK, if I'm honest may daughter isn't quite that talented. We skied and Samantha was strapped to my chest. She loved it, laughed all the way down. Funny thing is, she laughs just like Sam does. People would swear that she's our daughter.

Far as you want to take me
Far as your eyes can see
Leave the world alone in the sky
You and I go free
You and I are free.

The voice tears at my heart. It's almost as if Sam is speaking to me. Maybe she's been trying to tell me something all along, and I just haven't been listening. What the hell am I doin'? Sam can't possibly have feelings for me. She can't.....but I know I'm dammed if I don't find out.

The traffic's heavy tonight. Every car on the road seems to be conspiring against me, trying to stop me getting back home.

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Somehow I need to love you
More than I need to breathe
I can feel you leaving the ground
I will follow down
You and I will drown.

The songs fades. I hit the repeat button, wanting to hear it again. Little Samantha is asleep at last. We're both lying on Jack's bed. It seemed the only place she'd be comfortable. As for me....I can imagine that he's here, despite the fact that the other side of the bed will be cold tonight.

***************************************************************************

I can't believe it's taken me so long to get here. Damn Friday night traffic. I called Sharon en route. She took it well, considering. Now I think about it, she didn't seem too upset.....but I don't want to think about her. Call it temporary insanity. I guess I just lost sight of who was actually important.

The lights are out, so I creep into my house, trying to be as quiet as I can.

I find them in my bedroom, asleep on my bed. My daughter and the woman I love. Sorry Samantha, you're gonna have to go back to the nursery. Someone else is going to be sharing Sam's bed tonight.

***************************************************************************

This is nice.

No Carter. Bad girl. Thou must not have improper thoughts about your CO.

Then there should be a rule against having a cute CO. They should all have plastic surgery above the rank of major to make them fat ugly and balding. No offence to General Hammond. I really shouldn't be here. I should've just left when he came home. I should've spent the rest of the night on the couch.

I roll away from him...only he follows, spooning himself against my back. The T-shirt I'm wearing has ridden up and his hand is resting on bare flesh. Oh dear. He must be asleep, otherwise he wouldn't be holding me this close.

"This is nice," his voice echoes my earlier sentiments.

Uh oh! Not asleep. Awake. He's awake.

I turn my head to look at him. His brown eyes are clear and steady. There's no doubt in my mind that he knows exactly what he's doing. Exactly.....and he hasn't even moved, nothing apart from his index finger which is stroking a small area of my skin.

"er.....good morning, colonel."

"Mornin', major."

Are we going to spend the rest of the day in bed? He doesn't seem to be in a hurry to move and I can't unless he does. Besides Daniel was going to drop round this morning and I can't let him find us like this. It isn't what it looks like. Not from my point of view anyway. I don't know what the colonel is thinking.

"Jack......"

"Jack?" he questions, with a smile on his face.

I didn't mean to call him that. It just sorta slipped out. Difficult to say 'colonel' when the man's hand is sliding under my shirt to cup my breast. Jack you are going to get us into so much trouble.

"Samantha," he breaths my full name, I can feel a rush of warm air on my neck. "There are so many things I need to tell you. Just in case it gets to be too late."

I'm going to wake up in a moment. We'll be on some alien planet, drowning in the water that's dripping off the trees.

"What do you need to say, Jack?" I ask.

I turn in his arms so I can look into his eyes. Does he know how scared I am? He smiles at me, tracing the outline of my lips with one finger. He knows. He's not going to do anything unless I want him to.

"Let me show you."

And I let him. God help us both, but I don't pull away as he kisses me. We're risking our careers.....and maybe more than that. I know where this will lead and it can't stop with just a kiss, but I don't intend to have any regrets. I send a silent prayer in the direction of the baby's room, 'Sleep in Samantha, please, just don't wake up for a while.'

I think both of us are a little unsure at first. Scared is probably a better definition. Afterwards, he holds me in his arms and we talk a little. Not much. Just enough to know that we're both OK with this. I'm more than OK. I'm happy...very, very happy.

***************************************************************************

She's crying. I smile to myself. This is the only time I can honestly say that I'm proud to have made a woman burst into tears. The music is powerful, even more so because I have someone to share it with. Her fingers are entwined in mine and her grip tightens as the song comes to it's end.

"Oh God, that's beautiful," she whispers.

"Told ya," I return.

I knew she'd love this. It's been years since I've been to the opera and taking Sam has been an absolute delight. Well worth the money I spent on the tickets. We dressed up for the occasion. Me in a tux and Sam's wearing a floor length blue dress, just the right colour for what I have in mind. My hand drifts to my pocket, just to check that the small box is still there. Wouldn't want to lose that. No way.

I can't describe the way she makes me feel. It's been a long road for both of us, but I think its been worth it. Definitely worth it. I'm even more certain when she settles against me, her head coming to rest on my shoulder as the music continues.

The start of our relationship was the worst kept secret at the SGC. I don't know how people found out. It was like we walked onto the base and everybody knew. What did we do, have signs above our head? Or T-shirts stating the fact that we'd started sleeping together? Personally, I blame Janet. She took one look at Sam and bustled her off into a corner for a girl talk. There was a lot of giggling, probably at my expense and I heard the word size being mentioned a couple of times. I left at that point only to run into Teal'c in the locker room, who promptly congratulated me. How did he put it? Oh yeah, something about I am pleased that you have finally consummated your relationship with Major Carter. Subtle as a brick, that's our Teal'c. The day ended with me being called to Hammond's office and given the standard lecture.

I take the box from my pocket and open it. The ring is sapphire and diamond. Took me a long time to find a stone that matched the colour of her eyes so exactly. It'll go great with her dress too. I look at her again. She's totally absorbed in the music. I kiss the hand that holds mine and slip the ring onto her finger. She looks at it and then cups my face in her hands and places a single kiss on my lips. Not the most traditional way to get engaged, but for me it feels just right. I sit back in my seat and let the music roll over me in waves.

Sweet.

The End.