TITLE : Dreamers Of Your Dream - 01 - Ing Nargso Sung Tulodo
AUTHOR: Blue Topaz
EMAIL: blue-topaz@lycos.com
RATING: PG-13
CATEGORY: Action/Adventure, Romance, Drama.
SUMMARY: Sam is trained to be the new SG-1 leader.
PAIRING: Sam/Jack
TIME FRAME: Season 5
ARCHIVE: SJD-yes, Carterfic-yes
SPOILERS: up to Season 5
SERIES & SEQUEL:
The 3rd story in 'Thread of Destiny' series, but you can read it as a stand-alone
story. ( www.geocities.com/bluetopazfic/tod.htm
)
1st story - 'Thread
of Destiny' www.geocities.com/bluetopazfic/threadofdestiny.htm
2nd story - 'Complicated
Heart' www.geocities.com/bluetopazfic/complicated.htm
DISCLAIMER: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of MGM, World Gekko Corp and Double Secret productions. No copyright infringement is intended. Please do not post or distribute this story without the author's permission. Copyright by Blue Topaz, 2003
NOTE: Thanks to Jackie W and Robert Holland who help me with my Minnesota-Colorado questions. :) Also thanks to my beta-reader, JayBee-Bug.
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URL of this story:
www.geocities.com/bluetopazfic/dreamers.htm
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Ing Ngarso Sung Tulodo
-- From the front, a teacher should set an example;
Ing Madya Mangun Karso
-- From the middle, a teacher should act as a motivator;
Tut Wuri Handayani --
From behind, a teacher should be a guide for the students' learning activity.
By Ki Hajar Dewantara.
*
*
*
PART 1: ING NGARSO SUNG
TILODO
Must. Not. Shoot. The. Colonel.
The mantra was repeated several times inside Major Samantha Carter's head.
"Carter, need help?" The smirk that decorated his face an hour ago was still there. Persistent as the power-thirst Aphopis had before SG-1 crashed his ship (with him and the Replicators inside it) into his planet. She would have loved nothing more than to wipe that smug grin off his face, like she wiped out the evil Goa'uld.
She shot him a glare but held back her tongue. Her breath was short and irregular, courtesy of the activity she was currently in.
"Come on Major. Say the word and I'll give you a ride."
Must. Not. Kill. The. Colonel.
A slightly different mantra was recited inside her head. She must remind herself that killing the Colonel equals court martial plus a very *very* sad Sam Carter. That would be bad.
"Never," she managed to get that word out between breaths. Big ... big ... big mistake. She must remember not to say anything while her lungs were out of oxygen.
"Suit yourself." He shrugged his shoulders.
Must. Not. Feed. Him. To. The. Goa'uld.
Oh yeah, the mantra was getting better and better.
One of his hands was on the steering wheel of the green military jeep he was driving, the other was fixing his shade's position, which failed miserably in hiding his gleam. She knew that he was laughing at her stubbornness inside. But she refused to react. The sun was shining brightly, she was grateful that she hadn't forgotten to put her cap on. The road in front of her seemed longer than it should have been.
Damn that man for being so cool and gorgeous with his sunglasses on. It had to be against the regulations for a commanding officer to look that good. Did the Air Force naively believe that all female officers have as much self-restraint as she does? She knew some who would gladly ignore the stupid Fraternization regulation and jump at the first chance to ravish him.
Damn her for being so honourable and acting like a good girl all the time. She really should take the Colonel's advice and learn to have a good time, one that did not involve any machinery or complicated equations. And damn her for being her, she only flashed him a quick smile when he said it and replied 'This is fun, Sir' while pointing at a naquada reactor.
Damn the naquada reactor for being so interesting.
"Colonel." A breathless voice came from behind her. It was Lt. Andrew Reed, an officer who had the tendency to speak before he could think. Nothing that the Colonel was unfamiliar with.
"Yes, Lieutenant?" The Colonel didn't take his eyes off the road.
"Why aren't you running with us?" Reed's voice was hoarse and forced. Didn't he know that it was highly uncomfortable to talk while running? She closed her eyes and rolled them. Some people just couldn't shut their mouth and had to speak their mind, without considering the time nor the place.
"And miss the chance to see all of you suffer?"
Captain Charlie Green could not help but laugh out loud. While running. He stopped running suddenly and coughed, his lungs in desperate need to be filled with air, when something -- or someone, bumped into his back. He really should have known better. He momentarily lost his balance and leapt forward, and luckily his reflexes saved him from falling flat on his face.
"Hey, watch it!" Lt. Maria Halle shouted. She was that 'someone'. Then with a little edge in her voice, she continued, "Sir."
They glared for a second and then started to run again.
"You are the one who ran into me, Halle." Green was shouting back. Apparently, it was easier to shout rather than to speak while you were running at the same time. Go figure!
Halle didn't take the blame laying down. "Because you stopped running suddenly, Captain!" The use of his rank was really for the sake of sarcasm.
"That was no excuse, *Lieutenant*." Ah, the emphasis of rank. He was superior to her.
"How so, *Captain*?" She didn't think that it was a big deal.
"You should watch where you're going, *Liutenant*." He didn't like what she was implying.
"I did. It was your fault, *Captain*." She didn't care about what he thought.
Kids these days. Sam had to resist the urge to pull her hair out.
"Oh yeah?" He was ready to start a fight.
That was it. Sam had had enough with the bickering. "STOP!"
One captain and two lieutenants stopped in their tracks and stood at attention. One Colonel pressed the breaks of his jeep while Sam stopped running as well.
"Problem, Major?" The Colonel's jeep was slightly ahead of the rest of them.
Trying to catch her breath, she looked back at him. "Nothing that I can't handle, Sir."
His eyebrows went up. "Okay. I'll leave you to it. See you back at the base."
"Yes, Sir."
He pulled his green military cap slightly and then took off after giving her a slight nod.
"Don't forget about the time!" He cheerfully informed her.
Oh crap, she forgot about the time. A quick glance at her watch told her that she still had around 30 minutes left. It should be enough, the base was not too far from their current position.
"Major?"
"Attention!" She barked the order. They straightened their backs, chins held high, hands at their sides. Perfect soldier pose.
She eyed them one by one. Her annoyance and disappointment at their behaviour was pretty obvious. "Listen to me carefully," she started with a low and dangerous tone. Her patience was on the verge of breaking down. "I don't want to hear another word from anyone until we've reached the base, understood!"
She kept her voice steady. "Anyone disobey that order, I'll have *all* of you cleaning the Stargate using a toothbrush and wax it until you can see your own reflections in it. Got that!"
Without waiting for their answer, she turned around and resumed her run again. The three officers exchanged bemused looks before finally following her in silence.
Once they set a pace, Sam sighed inwardly. It was so unusual of her to lose her patience over such a trivial matter. But she was exhausted and drained, mentally and physically. It had been a long and busy month. She had projects in her labs that needed to be done, going on the missions with SG-1, holding countless briefings and meetings with the scientists at Area 51, and on top of that, she had this special training.
Come to think of it, it was actually her fault. She asked for this special training, to shape and mould her into an officer worthy of commanding the SG-1. She did ask the Colonel to prepare her when he said that he wanted to retire. She still remembered it vividly; the guilt and hurt in him when he told her about his fear of losing her, after she was kidnapped off-world and got another memory stamp. He almost lost her, and he was willing to give up SG-1 for her. It had touched her, deeply. But she knew better than to accept it right away.
She was not ready yet. Not for this much responsibility of becoming the leader of SG-1. There were some of the Colonel's decisions in the past five years that she didn't agree with, and knew that she couldn't do them. Even though they were the right ones.
They talked to General Hammond, about his retirement plan and her need for guidance. After much consideration, the General agreed and even gave them some advice. That was why three of the brightest SGC officers were included in their plan. Hammond said that it would be a great chance for her to practice her leadership skills with a team of her own and the team could benefit from the Colonel's training. He *was* one of finest officers that the Air Force had to offer, after all.
Sam and the Colonel spent two days to hand-pick her team. Personal files were read, SG-team leader's recommendations were sought and a simple test was conducted. In the end, Captain Green from SG-6, Lt. Reed from SG-7 and Lt. Halle from SG-9 were selected.
She really shouldn't have let the Colonel talk her into choosing them. Even though they were fine officers, each of them had some personal issues.
Green, the Captain, was a tough man through and through. Brown hair, brown eyes, well-built body, broad shoulders, a real heart-throb. A likeable guy overall, someone that you could trust with your life. But sometimes, he let his emotions get the better of him and let his fists do the talking instead.
Lt. Reed had a degree in Biological Science, a bright scientist in addition to being a fine officer. Red hair, green eyes, slim build, freckled complexion, full of life, attitude and a joker. He and the Captain seemed to bond quickly, and became the best of friends. His problem was that he was too ... scientific, he didn't really like being a soldier, although he was a good one. He thought that he wasn't cut out to be one; he joined the Air Force because it was his family tradition.
And the last member of what was the so-called SG-Alpha team was Lt. Halle. Short black hair, brown eyes, slender, tall and the quiet one. She was a Linguist, spoke eight languages fluently, including Goa'uld. She was half-Hispanic, her mother was from Venezuela while her father was American. She had that chip-on-the-shoulder-thing of being a woman in the Army. Other than that, she was also a perfectly good officer.
She got along well with Reed, but sometimes she could be involved in a very heated argument with Green over nothing. Sam recognised their interaction; it was like watching the Colonel and her for the very first time. There were definitely sparks between them, but Green had already had a girlfriend outside the SGC. And Reed of course, being the chirpy person that he was, always tried to push their buttons without even realising it. It was not like they wanted each other just yet, but ...
Sam chewed her bottom lip, she really didn't need this unresolved sexual tension inside her team. Not at all.
---
Colonel O'Neill checked the timer.
"Not bad, you have 7 minutes and 46 seconds left."
The flustered and exhausted SG-Alpha stood in front of him. They had just arrived in front of the base's entrance where he was waiting a few moments ago.
He looked up from the watch. "I'll see you again next week." Sam didn't miss the glint in his eyes when he added, "15 minutes off the clock for the run back." And with a sly smile, he continued, "Dismissed."
The special team only worked together two days a week because they still had to carry on with their missions in their respected teams. Usually the training started at 06.00, and the Colonel would give them weapon or tactical tips to start the day. After a quick break, they would go to the empty warehouse near the mountain and a scenario would be played. The new team needed to solve it as best as they could and the Colonel would give his opinion and feedback after it was over. Then, they would end the day by running from the training facilities back to the base.
She could tell from his reaction that he was having such a good time at her expense. Her eyes narrowed as the rest of her team-members vanished inside the mountain, leaving the two senior officers alone.
"Something you want to say to me, Carter?"
"I have a question, Sir."
"Let's hear it."
She crossed her arms in front of her chest; her breathing was still irregular. "You seemed to enjoy this training better than the last one, Sir."
His brow furrowed. "Which one?"
"The one with the new recruits. Don't you remember? The one with Eliot, Hailey, Grogan and Satterfield." She tried to refresh his memory.
He started to walk back inside the mountain. "Oh, them."
She followed him and started to walk by his side, "Yes, *them*."
"Well, they were still green. I needed to put on my best intimidating face and plant some sense into their heads. Your team however ... it consists of experienced officers that deserve recognition. Don't get me wrong Carter, I'll shout and scream at you if you deserve it."
"I'll try my best not to disappoint you, Sir."
He glanced at her knowingly. "I know you will."
After exchanging a small smile, they continued their journey down the base in the elevator. He stopped at Level 22, where the mess hall was. She promised him to meet him there after refreshing herself. She headed towards the woman's locker room and took a hot shower to get rid of the sweat and dirt from her body.
Stepping out from the shower, she walked to her locker to get dressed.
"Major," greeted Halle. She also had just finished her shower and had already put on her clothes. She was still rummaging though her locker, as if looking for something.
"Lieutenant, ready to go home?" Sam asked casually while putting her pants on.
"Yes, Ma'am."
"Good. Get a good night's sleep then."
"I will."
The Major had finished getting dressed when she noticed the Lieutenant was still inside the room. She looked nervous, her head was down, staring at her own hands that were crossed in front of her.
"Something wrong, Halle?" Her curiosity was piqued.
Halle jerked her head up. "We want to say that we're sorry, Ma'am. For acting so childish today," she blurted out.
Sam gave her a speculative look. "Did the rest of the team put you up to this?"
She shook her head. "No, Ma'am. I got the short straw." The dead-pan expression on her face almost made Sam believe her words, but she knew better. Halle did this on her own initiative. Although SG-Alpha had only been formed for about a month now, the invisible bond was already there, ready to be nurtured by friendship and trust.
Throwing the wet towel into the laundry basket, Sam said, "I don't mind you bickering, but I would appreciate it if you didn't do it during training. You have to take this seriously Halle, this is a rare opportunity for all of you to learn from one of the most senior officers. Don't screw this up just because you can't keep your anger and irritation under control. Tell that to Green and Reed as well. I won't hesitate to replace you with someone else if I don't see you work hard enough in this team. Understood!"
"Yes, Ma'am."
"Good." Sam sighed as soon as she finished her scold. She really wanted to make the best out of this training; the Colonel had put so much effort in this and she would not let her team disappoint him. She would not let *herself* disappoint him. Leadership was not one of her finest qualities, but then again, the Colonel said that it was not a talent either. It was a learning process that came with experience.
She was ready to go to the commissary and meet the Colonel when she realised that Halle was still standing at the same spot and watching her carefully.
"Something on your mind, Lieutenant?"
Halle shifted her feet a little. She seemed to consider whether she should speak or not. Her hands were clasped together in front of her.
Sam recognised the hesitation. "Is it something personal?" Her voice was soft and full of concern. Her fatigue was soon pushed aside, Halle was her subordinate, her team. And she would do anything for her team, just like the Colonel would for his.
Halle licked her lips, she was still unsure. "I heard rumours, Ma'am."
"What kind of rumours?"
"About you and Colonel O'Neill."
She got Sam's full attention now. "Oh ... What did the rumours say?"
"That the whole reason behind this training is that once the Colonel retires and you resume command of SG-1 ..." She didn't finish her sentence.
Sam closed her eyes momentarily, it wasn't something new. It was only natural for the small and close-knit community like the SGC to have some hearsay floating around. And her relationship with the Colonel was an open secret anyway. "That after this is over, the Colonel and I would pursue a relationship? Is that what you were trying to say, Halle?" She kept her voice level and steady as she finished Halle's sentence..
Halle was clearly uncomfortable when she replied, "Yes."
A rational and collected Sam would end this conversation by saying that this was none of her business. But she was tired and frustrated, so she stared at the other woman intently. "What if we do?"
Halle's eyes went wide, she didn't expect the question. "Ma'am?"
Sam continued, "Is it against the regulations for a retired officer to go out with another officer who was his former subordinate?"
"Uh ... no."
"So?" Sam shrugged her shoulders. "What's the problem?"
Halle looked thoughtful. "I ... I guess I just didn't see you like that, Ma'am."
"Like what?"
"I see you as a strong and independent woman that doesn't need a man like him and ..."
Sam raised her hand, "Whoa ... stop right there. What do you mean by 'a man like him'?"
Halle began to panic, she didn't mean it to come out like that. "Colonel O'Neill is a good man, and I respect him a lot, Ma'am. But ... but ... " The intensity of Sam's scrutinizing glare had made her stutter. "What I was trying to say was ... I just don't understand."
The earnest confusion on her face had softened Sam's attitude. "You don't understand? About what?"
"Why would the two of you go through this much trouble for a relationship that might not work? There's no guarantee that the two of you would last. I am sorry Ma'am, but sometimes love is just not enough. I respect you and the Colonel a lot. I know that the SGC is his family, and to give it up will be really hard on him. If it doesn't work out, then he might blame you. I guess ... I guess I just don't want to see you two made a big mistake."
Sam was stunned, it had never crossed her mind that other people were also affected by her relationship. Unconsciously, she smiled at her. "What's your dream, Halle?"
"Ma'am?"
"I used to dream I'd become an astronaut when I was a little girl, to go to space in a rocket or a shuttle. It came true, although the rocket part was altered to an alien aircraft."
"Ah ..." Halle was at lost. She didn't know what to say, so she let the Major continue.
"My dream came alive, but not in a way that I wanted it to. I never dreamt about a parasitic alien creature that would threaten Earth on a daily basis ... or befriending a grey alien ... or having to face a mechanical spider ... or blowing up a planet ... or turning my father into a Tok'ra. I never dreamt about all that, but they came in a package with my space-travelling desire. Those extra things were beyond my control, there was nothing that I could do about it except deal with it the best I could."
She approached the Lieutenant and put a hand on her shoulder. "And now, I have another dream. I will try my best to make it come true, no matter what the outcome is. Because I know that I will not regret it."
She gave her a squeeze on her shoulder before she left her alone in the locker room. The young Lieutenant needed time to think about her words.
---
"What about P7Y 688?"
Sam couldn't repress a yawn, thankfully the Colonel missed it, he was engrossed in reading the file in front of him. They were in the mess hall, discussing SG-Alpha's first mission off-world. "688? Wasn't that a desert?"
"Yes," confirmed the Colonel.
"Can we go somewhere with a lot of trees, Sir?"
He looked up from his reading material. "Why?"
"Because I like plants," she grinned at him.
"Oookayyy," he stalled. "What is the relation between you liking plants and SG-Alpha's destination?"
"SG-Alpha is my team, thus I have a say in it. Besides, it's not often that the General offers a team an option of where to go." She yawned again.
"Get some rest, Major. I'll see what I can do about your bias for a green planet," he ordered.
She shook her head persistently. "No Sir. I'll get some rest when we're finished with this."
"Carter," he warned her.
"This is my team, Colonel," she insisted. "I should be here when the decision is made."
He let out a sigh at her stubbornness. "Fine, fine. What about P6 something something something, you know, the one that SG-1 visited last month? Lots of green leaves scattered around the planet. You said that you wanted to go back there to explore the planet further for conducting more tests on its dirt."
"P6X 7Y3? But we've been there already, Sir. I want to go someplace new. Somewhere exciting."
"Picky, aren't you?"
"I learned that from you," replied Sam.
He chose not to respond to that. Instead, he asked, "Do you have any planet in mind then?"
She searched her sleep-deprived brain for some data. "What about P89 768?"
"Huh?" He flipped the file-folder in front of him furiously. It contained all the information about all the 'visitable' planets that the SGC managed to establish a wormhole with.
She smirked. "It's a new one, Sir. We've just sent a MALP through last night. Early observation indicates that the planet is inhabitable but there were no signs of civilisation. However, when we sent the UAV, we spotted a temple. Now, we couldn't decide who the temple belongs to, but ..."
"Stop right there! You've planned this all along, haven't you?" he accused. He was always quick to figure out any kind of plot when he encountered one.
Her eyebrows rose. "Yes," she admitted. "You have to acknowledge that it's the perfect planet for us though." A small smile was playing on her lips.
"So, there was no point in discussing this for the last hour, was there?" His put down the file-folder on the table and closed it.
The small smile transformed into a fully-fledged grin. "And miss our quality time talking about those interesting planets, Sir? Nah."
"You know that I spent a lot of time on this, don't you?"
"I know."
"And I also read every God-damn file just for this. You of course know about that as well, don't you?"
"I wouldn't expect less from you, Sir."
"You *also* know how much I hate reading paperwork, don't you?"
"Sure I do."
"Do you know how many pages I had to read?"
"Somewhere around 200-300 pages if you exclude the cultural details and mineral reports of every planet."
He put his elbows on the table and buried his face in his hands, clearly fighting the urge to scream.
She leaned towards him, "Are you alright, Sir?"
"Just give me some time, OK." The muffled reply was the only thing that he could say without shouting like a mad man.
"Listen, I have to go to my lab now. There is some experiment that I need to look at. I'll send the file about P89 769 to your office first thing in the morning." She rose up from her chair. "See you later."
She walked out from the mess hall a happy woman. Just because she couldn't deny him from having fun at her expense, it didn't mean that she couldn't do the same thing.
---
"Sam."
Sam lifted her head from the naquada generator. Daniel was standing in front of her lab, holding two steaming mugs of coffee. She could smell the unique blend of the beverage.
"Hi, Daniel. How are you?"
He walked towards her and handed her one of the mugs. "I'm fine. Here, this is for you. It's decaff by the way."
She accepted the offering gratefully. "Thanks."
"Anytime."
She sipped the hot liquid. "Mmm ... this is really good."
Daniel sat on one of the stools. "So ... how are you?"
"I'm good. Good. A little tired, but good." Her eyes were traveling to the generator. When she didn't hear a response from her friend, she looked back at him. "Something wrong, Daniel?"
Daniel held his mug with both hands and turned it slowly. "Sam, don't you think that you've pushed yourself too far this time?"
"What do you mean?"
He sighed in resignation. "When was the last time you had time for yourself?"
Sam stared at the linguist. She couldn't remember. She couldn't remember the last time she was unoccupied.
"Sam?" Daniel asked for the second time.
"A long long time ago." She gave him a weak smile. "I've been busy Daniel."
He rolled his eyes. "Of course you have. I know that." He pushed his glasses up. "Just get some rest, OK. You look terrible."
"Jeez, thanks Daniel. You sure know how to make a girl feel appreciated."
"You're welcome."
This time it was Sam who rolled her eyes. Some men just didn't know how to make a woman feel like a woman. Daniel chuckled at her indignant expression.
"Well, no pain, no gain, remember?" Sam said.
"If you have too much pain, you will pass out before you can gain anything, am I right?" he countered her statement.
She had to congratulate her friend for his relentless efforts at making her see his point. "Okay, okay. I get it. Dr. Daniel Jackson thinks that Major Carter has to go to bed now, and there is nothing that the Major can say to make the Doctor leave her alone. Fine. Just let me shut the lab down and I'll go to my quarters and sleep. Happy now?" Her smile belayed the irritation and sarcasm in her voice.
Daniel could only shake his head and smile back to her. "Yes, I am."
---
Major Samantha Carter started her day by sending a copy of the preliminary report on P89 768 to General Hammond's and Colonel O'Neill's offices. Then, she went to her lab to have a meeting with her lab assistants to discuss the progress of their projects so far. Grabbing a quick lunch, she continued by checking her e-mails and replying to them. The scientists in the SGC and Pentagon had a very close relationship; they often exchanged ideas over the phone and e-mail because of the distance.
The day was still young but she felt weary already; it was like her energy was drained from her body. A brief visit to Daniel's lab and Janet's infirmary was just a desperate attempt to stay focused on what she was doing. This was the first time in many years that she was really considering going home early. But she still had a debriefing to do and some reports to finish. So she pushed her fatigue aside and did what was asked from her.
The debriefing went along smoothly, this was Daniel's debriefing on their last mission on P45 T69. She then spent the rest of her day in her lab, typing the reports up and reading the data from her experiments, trying to make sense of the numbers that were scattered on a piece of paper.
"Major Carter."
She rubbed her bleary eyes before she replied, "Teal'c. What can I help you with?" It was rare of him to come and visit her in her lab like this. He was standing near the doorframe, his hands behind his back.
Teal'c stepped inside. One of his eyebrows lifted. "We have a prior engagement. Do you not remember?"
Sam closed her eyes and cursed, "Oh, shit." She had asked him for a private tutorial on Jaffa 101 once a week. And the big guy had gratefully granted her request.
"When you did not show up at the appointed time, I was concerned," explained Teal'c.
She massaged her temples. "I'm sorry, Teal'c. I guess I just didn't realise that it was time." The clock on her lab's wall indicated that she was indeed 10 minutes late.
Maintaining his stoic face, the Jaffa said, "Apology accepted, Major Carter. Perhaps we should reschedule our session, it seems that you are in need of rest."
She smiled at her friend's concern. "I'm okay Teal'c. Just a little tired, but I'm okay." She gathered up all the papers on her desk and put them back in the filing cabinet.
"Are you certain?"
"I am."
He sighed inwardly. "Very well."
They both left her lab and headed down to Level 27, where his quarters were. Teal'c felt the need to do their sessions in the presence of hundreds of burning candles. It was the Jaffa way to educate their apprenticed, he said. It did give her a new perspective in studying. Sitting on the floor with the illumination of a small fire had presented her with a new experience. It was refreshing to think that way, more intimate and personal.
Teal'c was a great teacher. He would patiently explain and describe things in detail. Her questions were never left unanswered, and if he had any doubt about anything, he would tell her so.
When they reached his quarters, he swiftly lit up the candles inside his room while Sam made herself comfortable by sitting in one of the corners of the room, crossing her legs in front of her and resting her back against the wall. As she smelled the burning candles, she wondered exactly how many of them Teal'c really had in his room.
"Are you ready?" He asked once he sat in front of her.
"Yes."
"Very well. Today I plan to inform you of the origin of Kel'no'reem. You are probably aware that Jaffa have to perform this ritual to let the symbiote that we carry to ..." he started his 'lecture'.
Sam liked the way Teal'c mixed the cultural and the military strategies. It helped her understand the Jaffa way of life better. Knowledge that she knew would be invaluable in a battle against the Goa'uld.
Even though Teal'c's narrative was interesting, his steady and calm voice combined with the warm and comfortable environment soon made her eyelids lower gradually as sleep overwhelmed her.
***
"Jack."
Colonel Jack O'Neill averted his eyes from the P89 768 preliminary report that Carter dropped in his office that morning to his friend. They were having dinner together in the mess hall. There was a familiar look in Daniel's eyes that caught his attention. "Yes?"
Daniel held his fork in the air. "How are things going with SG-Alpha?"
Jack knew that it wasn't what the archaeologist really wanted to talk about, but he played along. "Fine. They're getting along fine. Why do you ask?"
"No reason." Daniel shrugged his shoulders and forked some pie into his mouth.
"Okay." If Daniel couldn't be honest with himself, who was he to argue. Jack turned his attention back to the report.
A minute passed in silence.
"Jack."
Jack didn't bother to face him this time, he kept reading when he answered Daniel's call, "Yes, Daniel?"
"I ... uhm ... hey, is that the report on the planet where SG-Alpha is going?" Daniel was clearly trying to make conversation with him.
"Yes, it is." Jack said evenly as he lifted his head slightly to face the linguist.
"Can I see it?"
"Sure. After I finish, you can have it."
"Oh ... OK."
No one said anything. Mentally, Jack gave Daniel 50 seconds before he spoke again. And when the count reached 43 ...
"Jack."
"Yes, Daniel?"
"You ... uh ... are you going to finish that cheesecake?"
"No, Daniel. You can have it if you want to."
"Oh ... OK. Thanks."
The whole encounter was done while Jack had his eyes on the report in his hand. He gave him 40 seconds now.
"Jack," at exactly 39 seconds, Daniel called his name again. Jack was pleased, he was getting good at this.
"Yes, Daniel?"
Daniel sighed heavily. "Nothing."
"Whatever you say, Daniel." Jack bit down a smirk. This was just too fun.
Jack was starting to concentrate on what he was reading again, when --
"Okay, Jack. I'm just going to say it."
Jack looked up and was confronted by a pair of insistent blue eyes. "Say what?"
Daniel wasn't intimidated. "Could you cut Sam some slack? She was exhausted. I have never seen her so shattered like this."
Jack bit his own tongue. He understood perfectly what his friend was saying. He pushed Carter, *hard*. But he only did this for her own good. "I can't."
"You can't or you won't?"
"Daniel." The warning in his reply didn't go amiss by Daniel.
Defeated, Daniel pinched the bridge of his nose. "I never understand your military bravado," he said regretfully. He and Teal'c were the first people who Jack and Sam told about their plan. They had expressed their support, but Daniel didn't know that things would turn out this way.
"You're not supposed to, Daniel. You're a civilian, remember?"
Daniel sighed for the second time. "I just don't want to see her break down."
Jack eyed him carefully. "Carter is tough. You should put more faith in her."
Daniel muttered, "I know. But it doesn't stop me from worrying about her."
"I'd be surprised if you didn't." Jack presented him with a reassuring smile.
Suddenly, a shadow fell over Jack. He looked up to see Teal'c was standing next to their table.
"Teal'c, feeling peckish?"
"I do not," Teal'c replied. "However, I wish to inform you that Major Carter has just lost consciousness in my quarters during our session."
"She's fallen asleep on you?" Daniel was intrigued. "Wow, Teal'c, I'm impressed. No one has been able to do that to Sam ... 'till now."
Jack clenched his fists, Daniel had made his point. It was unusual for Carter to let her guard down like this. This past month had finally taken its toll on her. But he couldn't do anything about it, this was her problem. He could only wait until she asked for his help. Carter was a very independent individual.
Daniel continued, "Jack, this is what I'm talking about. You know her as well as I do. This is not like Sam."
Jack closed his eyes for a moment. Realising that he didn't have a solution for this problem, he looked at Daniel, and then Teal'c. "What would you guys do if you were me?"
Daniel was the first to offer his advice. "What about giving the Alpha team less physical training next time."
"Can't do that Daniel. The training is not all about her, I still have the other members to think about. I can't change the training just because Carter's not at her peak."
Daniel tried again. "Order her to take this weekend off."
"What's the point of giving her an order that she's likely to disobey?"
Daniel slumped back into his chair as he conceded.
Teal'c leaned down and spoke to Jack in a low voice so that no one else could hear what he was saying. Jack's eyes went wide as the Jaffa's words registered in his brain. As Teal'c straightened up, he let out a small smile. "I know for certain that Major Carter cannot refuse your proposition this time."
Jack face was lit up with a grin when he said, "You know what Teal'c, I think you're right."
Daniel watched the interaction with great interest. "What proposition?"
The Colonel and the Jaffa exchanged a conspiring glance before Jack got up from his seat and left the bewildered linguist in the dark. He had to deliver a proposal that his Major could not deny.
"Teal'c?" Jack could hear Daniel ask for Teal'c's explanation before he got out of the room. He'd be more than happy to leave the task of briefing the archaeologist in the Jaffa's hands.
He headed towards Teal'c's quarters, where Carter was. He entered the room quietly because he didn't want to disturb the sleeping Major. She was leaning heavily against the wall, Teal'c had draped a blanket over her. He picked up one of the cushions that Teal'c used to meditate and sat himself in front of her.
She looked so peaceful and frail at the same time, and her awkward position didn't disturb her much needed rest. He watched her slow and regular breathing; he was not going to wake her up just yet. She needed the nap and he needed to think about what he was going to say. He knew that Teal'c wouldn't come back to his quarters until he informed the big Jaffa about the success of his plan.
---
Jack watched her eyes flutter open slowly. Her brain hadn't woken up just yet as the figure in front of her started to take shape. He smiled at her. "Welcome back."
Sam blinked her eyes twice and as her brain caught up with her body, she blushed furiously. "Sir ..." She gripped her blanket tightly and held it close to her chest. "What are you doing here?"
"Oh you know. A noisy Jaffa told me about a Major who invaded his quarters. He asked for my help to kick the offending Major away so that he could finally get some sleep." He *so* enjoyed making her uncomfortable. It brought out a different side of her that he rarely saw.
"Argh ..." She lifted the blanket up to cover her head in an attempt to hide her embarrassment.
Jack pulled the blanket away. "Come on Carter. I don't remember you being the shy type?"
"Just let me die in peace, Sir. If it's not too much to ask." She refused to let go of the material.
He laughed at that. "Sorry to disappoint you, but I can't do that. Now, let the blanket go, Major."
With some protest that came out in the form of gibberish and incoherent muttering, she obliged. He then threw the blanket, landing it on Teal'c's bed.
"Carter ..." Jack started. "Do you have anything to do this weekend?"
The Major stretched. "Uhm ... I think so. There's this project that I've been meaning to do. I haven't managed to find the time to actually do it, so this weekend is the perfect time to start it. Why do you ask?"
He stood up and offered his hand to her. "Is it a really important project?"
She took his hand and pulled herself up. "Not really, it's a personal one."
"So ..." He let her hand go, contrary to his desire to hold it much longer. "Do you *have* to do it this weekend?"
She eyed him suspiciously. "Well, I suppose I could do it *next* weekend, but I was hoping to ..."
He cut her off, "Come fishing with me."
"... do it ... " She trailed off as his invitation registered inside her brain. And then she seemed to find an interesting spot on the floor.
Panicking as he watched her speechlessness, he rambled, "You know. Minnesota, land of sky-blue water, mosquitoes, the great outdoors, home of the ..."
"Yes."
Jack couldn't believe his ears. "Huh?"
She cocked her head and bit her lip. "I said 'yes'."
"Ah," was all he managed to say. It never crossed his mind that she would agree so easily. But then again, something had changed. The 'things' between them were more subtle now, more assured. A comfortable silence was exchanged between them. "Good, good. Great even. Fantastic," he prattled along. Relief and joy washed over him
She was clearly amused by his reaction. "Uhm, how do we get there?"
"Let me worry about that. You just get yourself ready for a relaxing weekend," answered Jack.
"OK."
"OK."
They were going to his cabin, *together*. Jack couldn't be any happier than he already was. It was good to know that she finally cashed in on that long overdue invitation.
"I better go back to my quarters now, I think I invaded Teal'c's territory long enough." Carter made a move towards the door and opened it. Before she shut it, she turned around to face him, "Could you please blow all the candles out before you leave the room, Sir? It's not safe to leave burning candles unattended. Good night."
He was still in high spirits when he nodded, he didn't realise just *yet* how many candles there were in Teal'c's room.
***
Samantha Carter was head over heels.
Definitely.
She never thought she could feel this strongly about anything. But the clear sky, the lines of green trees, the gorgeous lake and the sound of the wild-life had made her love it more.
Oh yeah, Samantha Carter was in love with her CO's cabin scenery.
"Wow ... this is beautiful," she said out loud.
"I'm glad you like it ... But please Carter, could you help me with our luggage first? You'll have time to enjoy the panorama later on. I won't bother you, I promise."
She turned around to see him holding two duffel bags in each hand. One was hers and the other was his.
She grinned at him. "You're doing a good job at it. I don't think you need my help."
He stepped in front of his cabin's door. Transferring one bag to the other hand, he then used his free hand to fish out his key and opened the lock. "So, you don't mind me rummaging through your bag?"
Hastily, she went to his side and snatched her bag away from him. There was some stuff in her bag that she didn't want him to see. Women's stuff.
"Thought so." Smirking, he opened the door and stepped inside. She glared at him, but to no avail. He continued, "We have to clean the cabin a bit. It's been a while since I last came here."
Sam took a good look at the cabin. It was pretty spacious despite the outer appearance. There was a fireplace on one of the walls, a small but quite modern kitchen one the other side and some tables and chairs. "Where can I put my stuff?"
He opened another door and pointed inside. "This is your room. We need to change the bedding."
She peered over his shoulder to see a small room with a single bed in it. There was a small wooden table at the side of the bed. He stepped inside and opened the window. A small breeze caressed her as she smelled the fresh outdoors. There was something particularly pleasant about Earth's nature that never ceased to amaze her.
"I hope this is OK for you."
"It is. Thank you," she said sincerely as she put her bag on the table.
"Let me show you the bathroom."
He then gave her a little tour around the cabin before he went outside to the small shed adjacent to his cabin where he kept the generator. No electrical company was sane enough to offer their services to this secluded small cabin. The generator was mainly used to power the lights, the water pump, the water heater, the small fridge and numerous kitchenware.
Sam put a clean sheet on her bed and the Colonel's. His room was just next to hers, a bit bigger with a double bed in it. She opened the windows to let the fresh air circulate inside the small cottage. After that, she cleaned the kitchen and the sink.
She went to the car to get their groceries out from the backseat. They took a three hour long flight from Colorado to Minneapolis early in the morning and rented a car at the airport. After a roughly two hour drive, they stopped at a local store to shop for food. And a fifteen minute drive had finally seen them arrive at their destination. Sam spent most of the journey sleeping, and the Colonel didn't seem to mind.
As soon as she finished putting their food inside the fridge (it wasn't working yet as the Colonel was still working on the generator) and the cupboards, she started to swept the floor. It was a wooden floor, the Colonel had showed her earlier where the broom and the dustpan were.
"I never saw you as a domestic goddess."
She spun around to see her CO was standing at the door, wiping his dirty hands on a cloth. "There's always a first time for everything."
He smiled warmly. "I guess so. The generator is up and running, but it usually needs half an hour before the electricity starts to work properly," he informed her.
"Do you want me to look at it?"
"No, it's OK. It's an old generator."
She nodded and continued her chores. When they finished cleaning everything up, he took her for a quick stroll around the lake and had a picnic near the lake. She enjoyed it immensely, being close with him and feeling comfortable around him.
The Colonel didn't want to talk about work. Every time a working related subject came up, he would refuse to discuss it and skirted the issue. It was a bit off-putting at first.
"Don't talk about the SGC, Carter. Talk about something else."
"But Sir, my life revolves around SGC. What else can I talk about?"
Even though they were miles away from any other human being, the military still had a strong hold on them. But she didn't mind, because this was who they were.
"Well, you could always talk about ... Cassie. Tell me about her."
"You know her."
"Pretend that I don't."
"I'm not good at this."
"Try. Come on."
"Well, Cassie is my friend's daughter. She's a very bright young lady and I love her. I watched her grow up and am very proud of her. She just got a new boyfriend last week."
"WHAT!? Who is it? Who's his parents?"
"You don't know Cassie, remember?"
"Like Hell I don't. I want a name and I want it now."
She only gave him her laughter as the answer. That was the ice breaker; they talked about everything after that.
About her family.
"Mark always blamed dad for mom's death, but I believe that if mom were still alive, he would be a Colonel right now."
About his family.
"Sometimes, I dream about Charlie."
"You do?"
"Yes. I miss him."
"I'm sure he misses you too."
About her habit of talking to her plants.
"You gave your plants an astrophysics lecture?"
"Yes, I pretended they were the audience. It helps me practice speaking in front of large spectators. Besides, they grow better if you just spend a little time talking to them. They have feelings too, you know."
"..."
About his desire to have a dog.
"What are you going to name your dog if you ever get one?"
"I'm going to name him Thor, what do you think? Carter ... Carter, are you alright? Did you just choke on something? Here, have something to drink."
About her cat, Schroedinger.
"He was a stray cat. I found him in front of my apartment one day. Still a kitten then, he looked so lost and he was staring at me, I just couldn't ignore him. So I adopted him instead."
"Why did you name him after a mad scientist? I don't get that."
"Sir?"
"Well, that Scroedinger guy was proposing a way to kill a cat, right?"
"He never actually did it, Sir. It was just a theory."
"Still, don't you think that you were being unfair to the poor cat? He was reminded of that crazy guy and what he was going to do to his fellow furball every time you called his name."
"..."
About his obsession with 'The Simpsons'.
"Why do you think that Homer Simpson is the greatest American ever?"
"Why not?"
And then he taught her how to fish.
"Teal'c is right. There is no fish in the lake."
"Carter, I told you before and I told you again now. This is not about the fish, this is about *fishing*."
"You mean holding onto a rod at one end with a string attached to the other end and doing nothing at all?"
"Ah ... I like the way you illustrate it."
"You mean you agree with me?"
"Sure, why not? You're the genius."
"Colonel ..."
"Shhh ... just enjoy it Carter. Don't talk too much, you'll scare the fish."
"I though you said that this was not about the fish."
They didn't catch any fish, but Sam did get the point of *fishing*. It was all about doing 'nothing at all', it was about sitting there, taking pleasure in the peace and appreciating nature. And to her surprise, she enjoyed it. She enjoyed how her brain didn't have to work hard, and all her worries seemed to dissipate. She didn't have to be Major Carter or Doctor Carter when she was fishing, she was simply a human being who needed an escape from her daily routine.
The Colonel cooked their dinner. It was grilled fish (they bought it earlier), marinated with the O'Neill family secret (or so he said) accompanied with mashed potatoes and side salad. They ate outside as the weather was still warm that time of the year. Sam was glad that she finally had the courage to go fishing with him. It was relaxing and she had such a great time.
He walked her to her room and threatened her before she went to bed.
"Okay, this is *vacation*, remember? I don't want to hear you leave your room before at least 1000 hours. Ah, ah, ah ... no argument on this one. If you wake up much earlier than that, try to go back to sleep. If you break this rule, I get out of my bed, put you inside your room and lock you up there until the clock shows 1000. Understood?"
"What if I need to go to the toilet?"
"Okay, going to the toilet is permitted, that's it."
"And if I'm thirsty?"
"Take a glass of water into your room."
"What if I run out of water and am still thirsty?"
"Take a jug of water instead, how's that?"
"What if I was feeling hungry at night?"
"Here, have a pack of biscuits."
"And if I was sleepwalking?"
"Carter, don't test my patience."
"Just asking."
She slept well that night, she wasn't even dreaming. It was the kind of sleep that made you feel refreshed in the morning. Her military body-clock woke her up at exactly 0500 hours in the morning, but obeying her CO's order, she tried to go back to sleep. She woke up for the second time around 0940 hours. Amazed at what a few extra hours of sleep could do to her, she felt like she could face anything. It was a great feeling.
She was tempted to get out of her room, but knew better than to ignore the warning that the Colonel had given her last night. So she dragged the small table to the window and sat on it while enjoying the beautiful view.
They had pancakes at breakfast, another O'Neill family secret recipe. After that, they had another round of fishing before they had lunch and closed the cabin. They had to catch a plane back to Colorado.
Sam surprised herself by feeling disappointed when their weekend away had to end. She liked being around 'Jack', even though he was as bossy as the Colonel. She tasted what the future with him would be like, and she loved it. Just being around him made her feel whole and content.
She knew that she was lucky to know him. And she swore not to take it for granted.
---
"So, how did the fishing go?" Daniel was trying to pry for some information about Sam and the Colonel's weekend trip.
"It was great, Daniel." Sam gave him a fake smile deliberately, refusing to give him any details.
The weekend away had really improved her moral. She could concentrate more to her work now as opposed to last week when she felt like she was forced to do her job. Last week, there was no satisfaction and joy in doing her work, but now? Now she was the old Samantha Carter, the SGC's workaholic astrophysicist.
"Oh come on Sam. I just want to know whether something interesting happened there."
"We fished. That's what happened."
"Define 'fishing' for me, will you?" His eyebrow rose suggestively.
"Daniel," exclaimed Sam.
His face was a picture of innocence. "So, nothing happened, huh? I guess I gave Jack too much credit."
She sighed. "We're not a couple of hormone-driven teenagers you know, we're responsible adults. There are some lines that shouldn't be crossed."
He smiled. "I know, I know. But I'm glad for you, you look much happier and more relaxed than before the trip. I just wonder whether it has anything to do with this 'fishing' activity that you did this weekend."
She glared at him, Daniel was merciless at teasing. "Doctor Jackson, did you come to my lab today just to have a chit chat?"
"Touché. You've been hanging around Jack for too long, you know that?"
"You hang around him more often than I do."
"But he never took me 'fishing'." Daniel smirked. He refused to drop the subject.
"I'll let him know that you feel left out. I'm sure that he would be happy to invite you to go fishing with him next time." She crossed her arms in a defiant manner.
"Make sure you do that. I'd love to discover the joy of 'fishing'."
"I'm sure you will," she replied dryly.
Daniel put up his hands. "Okay, enough about fishing. I came here to ask if I can pick you up for lunch."
"You go ahead, Daniel. I have a briefing today, got to prepare the slides."
Daniel looked disappointed. "Oh, is this about SG-Alpha's first mission?"
"Yes. The General has already given us a go for the mission."
"Good luck then, Sam. I'll see you around." He started to walk off from her lab when he said, "Hey, if you have any problems, just give me a shout, OK. I know that I can't teach you how to fish or anything like that, but ..."
"DANIEL!"
---
Sam knocked at Teal'c's door. A few seconds later, he opened the door.
"Teal'c."
"Major Carter. To what reason do I receive this honour?"
Sam smiled at the politeness as she handed him a bag. "This is for you, Teal'c. As 'I'm sorry' and 'Thank you' gestures combined in one."
Teal'c eyed the bag, but he didn't make any move to receive it. "I can not accept it. You owe me no apology."
"Teal'c, I slept on you while you were talking. It was rude."
"It was understandable, you were exhausted."
She knew that there was no point in contradicting Jaffa logic. "Okay, this is a 'thank you' gift then. For being so patient with me when sharing your knowledge about the Goa'uld and for being my friend."
Teal'c smiled and bowed his head slightly. "Then it is my pleasure to receive this gift." He reached down into the bag and pulled out the object inside it. He raised an eyebrow.
"Ah, it's some sort of snack, try it. It's good. You can only find them in the UK. One of my friends just came back from there and she brought some of them back with her. I hope you like it."
"Intriguing. I will try these ... 'Jaffa Cakes'." He was confused and yet fascinated at once.
"You do that. Once again, thanks Teal'c."
"You are most welcome."
She looked down at her watch. "Listen, I got to run now. I have a briefing for SG-Alpha's mission in a minute. I'll talk to you later."
"Major Carter." Teal'c put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "I have full confidence in your abilities." And with that he closed the door.
She couldn't help but wonder whether it was the Jaffa way of saying 'Good luck'.
---
General Hammond, Colonel O'Neill and SG-Alpha were in the briefing room. They were having the briefing about the much awaited mission.
"This is a standard exploration mission, we'll spend approximately 72 hours on the planet. Do you have any questions?" Sam asked her team as soon as she briefed them about the planet. The General and the Colonel had been informed about the details of the mission earlier.
Reed raised his hand.
"Lieutenant," Sam nodded at him, giving him permission to speak.
"Which SG team will accompany us on this mission?"
"We'll be going alone."
"But the handbook ..."
The General cut him off, "I know what the handbook says. When a team is lead by a new CO, they will be paired with another team for their first mission, I am aware of that fact. But this team is different. Major Carter might be a new CO, but she not new to this program. She's gone through the gate before and so have the rest of you. You are not a new team, just a collection of SGC officers."
Sam knew that the General put so much faith in her, and sometimes it was frightening.
Now it was Green who raised his hand.
"Captain?"
"Do we have any idea at all on who the temple might belong to?"
"Not yet. The UAV couldn't provide us with more details."
"Are we going to bring extra weaponry? We couldn't be too careful. For all we know, the temple could be a Goa'uld fortress." Green had always had that over-suspicious military mind.
"We're going to gear up like we normally do. But we'll proceed with caution. Let's hope that it's just a temple."
A few more questions and the meeting was concluded. The rest of the party had left the room, leaving her and the Colonel alone.
"First mission, huh? Cool."
She cleared her throat. "Thank you, Sir."
His eyes never left hers, he was sitting across the table. "Nervous?"
She slumped back into her chair and took a big breath. "Not really. It's just going to be weird to go out there without you guys watching my back."
"Your team will do that for you."
She stood up from her chair and walked to the big window, staring down at the Stargate. It looked magnificent and graceful, a few technicians were doing a routine check-up on it. She touched the glass, as suddenly some trepidation was creeping into her mind. "I know. It's going to be different, though."
He approached her and stood beside her. "You'll do fine." And just as simple as that, he drove her anxiety away.
***
"How was the meeting?" Daniel asked.
"Great, great. It went well. They were scheduled to go there in a week's time," Jack answered absently. He had just entered Daniel's lab, Teal'c was also there. He had promised to meet them as soon as the meeting was over. He picked up a random picture from Daniel's table and studied it.
Daniel typed something down on his computer keyboard. "Thanks Jack."
"What for?"
"Taking care of Sam. She looks more focused now compared to last week."
He looked up from the picture. "She's my friend too, Daniel. You don't have to thank me."
"Is there something that you wish to share with us, O'Neill?" Teal'c asked. He noticed the weariness in him.
Jack ruffled his hair. "Carter's nervous. It's so unlike her."
Daniel frowned in confusion. "Why shouldn't she be? This is a big step for her."
"Daniel, this is Carter we're talking about. The one that is always pulling great ideas out of her butt ... head, out of her head." He grimaced inwardly at the sight of a growling archaeologist and a stern Jaffa. He slipped, so what? Was he supposed to be unaware of her attributes? He had eyes, for crying out loud.
"Well, Sam is also human. She has fears of failure too. She doesn't want to let you down."
"Nonsense. She will never let me down," he admonished. It didn't sound like the Carter he knew.
"What if she does let you down? Don't tell me that it's not possible. People make mistakes, and Sam realises that. Just because she hasn't made a big one, it doesn't mean that she won't," reasoned Daniel.
He didn't have the answer for that. It never crossed his mind that his trust in her could turn into a burden. He didn't mean it to be that way.
"Major Carter is lacking in confidence," interjected Teal'c who had been watching his friend silently.
"Sam is anything but lacking in confidence," dismissed Daniel.
"She does not believe that she can be a great leader as O'Neill is."
"Well, Jack's not an ordinary man, he's a hard act to follow."
"Hard does not mean impracticable."
He listened as his friends were arguing, both had valid points. But he always knew one thing for sure, he could always count on her.
"Guys, let's stop this right now. We could talk until we dropped dead, but she's the only one who can solve her problem, whatever problem that she has."
"What if she can't solve it?" Daniel was clearly concerned about her.
"Then, we'll be there for her. Right?"
Teal'c smiled. "I must concur."
Daniel smiled too. "Me too."
"Good."
* End of PART 1 *
To be continue in PART 2