Title: Tests

Author: Shanna

E-mail: shazbucket101@aol.com

Rating: G

Summary: Jack takes a test with surprising results

Spoilers: None

Season: Anytime after Fair Game

Archive: SJD

Disclaimer: It all belongs to the wonderful people who make the show.

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Tests.
 
 

“So whatcha doing Major?” Colonel Jack O’Neill entered his 2IC Major Samantha Carter’s lab.

“Just trying to work out why one of my computer monitor’s isn’t working?”

“Maybe it’s not working because it’s in pieces.” Jack helpfully pointed out.

“Thanks sir, but it wasn’t working before I took it to pieces.”

“Did you plug it in?”

“Of course. Was there something you wanted sir or did you just come to make helpful suggestions again?”

“No, I just thought I’d come and see what you were doing since I finished my paperwork.”

“Basically you were bored, you ran out the batteries on your Gameboy, Daniel kicked you out, Teal’c is Kel’no’reeming so you thought you’d come and see me.”

“Exactly. So can I help?”

“I’ve got to go and see Sgt Siler for another part, but there’s this website Cassie was telling me about it should keep you occupied while I’m gone. Do you want to try it?”

“Sure. Why not?” Sam sat at her main computer, connected to the Internet and logged onto the website.

“There you go sir, just answer all the questions honestly. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

“Is it some kind of test, I hate tests.”

“Think of it as military logic tests, you have to figure out the right answer to move on.”

“Sure whatever, go get your part I’ll manage.” Sam left him to carry out the test. He intently began answering the questions.

~ ~ ~

“How’s it going sir?” Sam asked as she returned a few minutes later.

“That’s the last one. Carter, what’s it doing now?” He asked as a little calculator appeared in the middle of the screen.

“It’s checking your answers and figuring out the results.”

The computer beeped.

“Congratulations your IQ is…” Sam trailed off as she read the number. She grabbed the phone. “Daniel, did you do that test Cassie told you about yet… That’s what I thought, can you come to my lab a minute there’s something you need to see… Yeah, bring Janet too.”

“Carter what’s going on? Why do we need Daniel and Janet here.” She said nothing and just stared at the screen in stunned silence.

“So Sam what’s up?” Daniel asked as he entered Sam’s lab.

“I had Colonel O’Neill do that IQ test while I went to get a part for the monitor. Look at the results.”

“Jack has an IQ of 143?” Daniel looked as stunned as Sam had done.

“Guys, what’s going on here, you’re scaring me.”

“Colonel, this is an IQ test, it asks you lots of different questions, in different areas to measure your intelligence level. The result is your IQ level, and yours is 143.”

“Is that bad?” He asked still uncertain of what the results meant.

“Sir, my IQ is 140.” Sam explained.

“Mine is 139.” Daniel said.

“I got a 128 when I did it.” Janet added.

“So my score is higher than yours is this a bad thing?”

“Urrr. No. Daniel help.” Sam didn’t know how to put it into words exactly.

“Remember how you told me that on the day you met Sam, General Hammond smacked you down from your little ‘I am the big Colonel, and I don’t like scientists speech’ by saying Sam was way smarter than you.”

“Yeah. But what’s that got to do with anything?” Jack asked.

“Uhhh. Well according to that test, your IQ is higher than ours which means you’re way smarter than us.”

“What did you say?” Jack asked.

“I said Jack you are way smarter than us.”

“Thank you Daniel.” He took the tape recorder out of his pocket and switched it off record. “It’s nice to know you’ll finally admit it.” He said before he started laughing.

“What’s so funny sir?” Sam asked.

“I’m sorry but your faces. My IQ isn’t 143 it’s 113.”

“Not according to this test it’s not.” Daniel said.

“It’s 113 trust me. It’s easier to come out with a higher IQ if you remember most of the answers from when Cassie made you take it last week. I just wanted to see you explain it. Now I’d better get back to work.” He left smiling.

“Janet, if I happened to accidentally beat up my CO is there any form of drug that you give him to make him forget it was me?” Sam asked.

“You’re first in line behind me.” Daniel added.

THE END