Title: Feel

Author: Hatchepsut

email: hatchepsut@shaw.ca

rating: G actually M for Mushy

Summary: What do you think about just before falling asleep on an alien world?

rating: Ship/romance

Spoilers: nothing you don't already know.

Archive: SJD, yes

Disclaimers: I don't own a darn thing.

Authors notes: Thanx to The Powers That Be who let me borrow these fine characters. Thanks to the Uber-beta Teresa Potter...she made this into what it is. Honest it's her fault! Feedback as always is nice.

It was night and it was at times like this that she was able to drop her tight grip on her emotions and just let herself breathe. It was then, in the moments just before sleep claimed her, that she could allow the wings of her heart to unfurl and take a small flight. It was then that the emotions she'd kept squashed into a tight little ball tucked way in the back of her heart, could let themselves been known.

In the last few years she'd learned a lot. She'd learned how to weep silently, allowing her tears to be absorbed by her bedroll. She'd learned how to stifle laughs at their mis-adventures when she relived her day's activities. She'd learned how to hide her feelings for and from the people around her. She'd learned how to deny the fact that she was in love.

So it was at night, when the darkness hid everything, that she allowed herself to be Sam, not just Major Carter. She lay on her bedroll listening to the sounds that she associated with the night, whatever planet they were on. She heard Daniel snoring in the tent next to hers. She heard Teal'C's deep voice rumble as he agreed with something that the Colonel had said. Then she heard the sound she'd come to love. She heard the rustle of her tent flap and kept her eyes closed as she felt the Colonel look in to check on her. "Good night Carter." O'Neill whispered. "Sleep well."

She let herself smile as she rolled onto her side away from the flap. He didn't think that she knew that he always checked on her just before he bedded down for the night. He didn't think that she knew that he watched her for a moment when she couldn't watch him back. He didn't think that she knew that she loved him as much as he loved her.