Title: Dream Over Me With A Tear.

Author: Bad Dragon Gen.

Email: warrior_of_gondor@hotmail.com

Status: Complete, 5/7

Archive: SJD yes, anywhere else email and ask me.

Category: S/J, UST.

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Slightly adult content.

Season: 7

Spoilers: Up to end of Season 6 but nothing really specific.

Summary: Sam's dreaming - and her reality isn't much fun either.

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Dream Over Me With A Tear

~* Dream over me with a tear;
Anything it takes to wish me here.
Or magic and sweet lullabies -
Any lucky penny will do fine. *~
'Any Lucky Penny', Nikki Hassman.

That night, I dreamed.

He was there, of course, soothing my distress and making me laugh the way he always used to. We walked in the sunshine under blossoming trees, hand in hand, arm in arm, talking and smiling and teasing and flirting in the springtime of our happiness. But it didn't last - he faded away, and I found myself alone in a dark land of thunderstorms.

My dad was there, telling me to let go - but I was clutching desperately at the blankets; I didn't want to leave my room, I didn't want to get up, because yesterday my world fell apart, and if I lie here and don't move I can pretend that mum isn't dead, she's just late, she's coming back, she'll be here soon, there was a mistake, she's on her way, and I won't have to walk out of this room and into the empty, terrifying chaos my life has now become.

"Sam."

It was her voice.

She was here.

"Mom?" I whispered.

"Oh, hush, what's wrong?" she asked, sitting next to me and putting her arm around me. We were on the bench under the blossom trees, and the sun was out again, warming my face even as the tears fell down my cheeks.

"Where's that charming man you were with?" she asked me.

"I sent him away," I confessed.

"What did you do that for, you silly goose?" she chuckled at me.

"I had to. There's no other way."

"Oh, Sam, honey," she chided gently. "It's time to let go."

"No, mum," I begged, clutching desperately onto her hand. "Don't, please. Stay with me."

"Do not to the marriage of true minds admit impediment," she said to me. Shakespeare. She loved quoting that. "You have learned to walk. Now learn to fly."

I awoke alone in my bed, staring about me, unable to believe how real my dream had felt. But it was only that - a dream. My mother was gone; she had not returned, she could offer no words of comfort. And I had no strength left to continue. In the loneliness of my bedroom, I cried until I couldn't breathe, until I felt that every pain I had ever felt had drained out of me.

Wearily, I rose and went to shower. The warmth of the water went some way to reviving my spirits, but I couldn't help but dread what today would bring. After everything I had said to Jack the night before, it could hardly be an easy meeting between us. I just had to hope that Jack would understand - that there could be some way to make him see that I was feeling this pain as much as he was.

A thought occurred to me, and I went to my bedside cabinet and took the little jewellery box out of the drawer. Lovingly, I slipped Jack's engagement ring on my finger, smiling softly at the promise it held. Someday, I told myself. Hopefully it would tell him too. I dressed in civvies and drove to the base.

I was met by Daniel and Teal'c before I even got to the locker room.

"What the hell is going on?" Daniel wanted to know.

"What do you mean?" I asked, wondering what he had heard and what he was getting at.

"Jack's applied for a transfer, SG-1's being reassigned," Daniel explained. "Jack's been sent to the Alpha Site on his own request."

"What?" I said in disbelief. "You're not serious?"

"Indeed we are, Major Carter," Teal'c assured me. "He is to leave today, in less than an hour's time."

"He can't!"

"Sam, there isn't time for this," Daniel said sternly. "He's doing this because of you."

I stared at him, willing him to be wrong. But I knew he wasn't.

"We all know something happened between you over Christmas," Daniel elaborated. "And I don't think it's a coincidence that ever since we got back you've been barely civil to each other, and now he wants to work off-world full time. Sam, what is going on?" he asked again.

"I broke it off for now," I confessed. "We just - can't do that right now."

"Why not?" Daniel wanted to know.

"I believe a compromise could be reached," Teal'c offered. "I would very much like to see you happy again, Major Carter."

"I can't," I objected.

"Sam, have you lost your mind?"

That was Janet, coming up the corridor in a storm of fury. "It's all over the Base; everyone keeps asking me what's happening. Are you just going to let him leave without saying a word?"

"I can't," I repeated.

"Sam, listen to me," Daniel said. "Don't turn away from this. You have a real chance of finding happiness and you might never get another shot at that; not with some one like Jack."

"He's right," Janet agreed. "Sam, what is between you and the Colonel is something few people in this world will ever share. Please, don't throw that away."

I looked from one to the other, and then to Teal'c. He said, simply: "It is time to let go."