Woven Threads
Sam gazed at the sleeping form of her father. It was strange though, to see him blinking at her while he rested, and it still took her a moment to realise that she was talking to Selmac. "Samantha…Do not worry about what cannot be changed…it worries your father." "I know…it's just so hard." Selmac reached forward with Jacob's hand. " I know…but you have a life too…one that's course can be changed…That's what needs your concentration." "But" "Your father has been worried about you as of late…Your heart is in conflict…You need to resolve this now…If your dilemma reaches a natural counterpoint, it will not be good for anyone." "I-I don't know what to do, and I shouldn't be giving you all this worry…You need to get better." Selmac inclined Jacob's head, and a moment later, she found herself talking to her father. "Then stop fussing over me, and go tell that SOB what you think." Sam tightened her grip on Jacob's wrist. "What do I say to him?" "Exactly what's on your mind…don't hold back…it isn't fair to you or him." Sam sniffed, trying to banish her tears. "I'll do it."
"For crying out loud." Jack shouted at his computer. Bending down with his trusty screwdriver in hand, he tried once more to remove the CPU's motherboard. He should have known better than to try and upgrade the machine at this hour. The truth was, he needed a distraction. The last few days had been a whirlwind. Things at the SGC had been surprisingly calm - It was everyone's personal lives that had been the problem. Firstly - Ishta arrived at the SGC, only to find out about Christa. That had turned out ugly to say the least, but Jaffa being Jaffa…they were talking again. Next up - Daniel had had another flirtation with ascension. The Archaeologist had kept the details sketchy at best, but Jack had an idea that Anubis and 'good ole Oma' had been there. Jack's personal life has actually been on an up, being that he'd actually had one. Things had been going great with Kerry. She was funny, intelligent; beautiful…He cared for her a lot. Problem with Kerry was that she was too smart…too perceptive. She'd realised that Jack was holding back before even he 'd realised. Still he'd been determined to keep the relationship alive. Until Sam had arrived unannounced at his house on their day off. "I'm having doubts about marrying Pete." She'd said. Just as she was about to elaborate, Kerry had arrived. Kerry - ever the gracious host, asked Sam if she'd like to stay, but Sam had babbled her excuses - very out of character. Then she got the call. Jacob was very ill. Jack was worried for Jacob/ Selmac - A man he'd come to think of as a brother. But rather selfishly, his thoughts were of Sam…after Kerry had finished with him. "If it's the military that's keeping you two apart then you're making a big mistake." "What should I do?" "Leave the Air Force…Run the base as a civilian." "I've considered it." He knew what he wanted to do, but there was one thing still puzzling him. Why had she told him of her wedding doubts? Deep down, he knew the answer, but he was too afraid to face it. He gazed down at the circuit board in his hands. It had become clogged with dust. It was a wonder it worked at all. He placed it in a small plastic container and he carefully reached for its replacement. Installing it would only take seconds. He looked down at the unfamiliar name. "New operating system? Sweet!" Jack would never admit it, but he loved doohickeys. He carefully placed the new board in the vacant space left by its predecessor. He secured it before screwing the tower's cover back into place. He bent down and restarted the power, waiting for the monitor to switch on, before he could input the command codes. At the same moment the monitor flickered into life, he heard a knock at the door. Too busy concentrating on inputting the commands, he shouted. "Door's open…come in!" He heard the telltale click of the door shutting. "I'm in my study!" Jack never looked at who came into the room. "Hello sir." Said a cold, feminine voice. Jack recognised the voice and spared a moment to look up at Sam who stood ominously in the doorway. "Hey Carter! How's dad?" "He's good…He doing okay." "That's good to hear…You don't need to hover there like a humming bird…come in." Sam, unable to say no to her commanding officer, walked into the room in cold, measured steps. Her curiosity piqued when she looked at Jack's desktop's monitor. "Doing a bit of reprogramming sir?" "Yeah…New OS board." Sam took another step. "Know what you're doing?" "I don't have an engineering degree for nothing." "This isn't engineering…this is programming." Jack looked at the monitor nonchalantly. "Same difference." He then input some more codes. "You know something…Jack." Sam chuckled. "Every time I think I know you…Every time I think I've figured you out…it turns out I'm wrong." "Colonel?" "Oh don't give me that crap!" Sam!" "I mean…do I even know you?" I mean…I didn't even know you could work a computer let alone reprogram one! How much do I really know you?" "Samantha I" "And Kerry? How long has that been going on?" "Is that any of your business Colonel?" "Yes…and Daniel's and Teal'c's…You don't keep things like…her…a secret." "Well maybe I wanted to keep her a secret!" "Why? Afraid someone would screw it up for you? Afraid it'd be a disaster and everyone would find out?" "Colonel!" "No Jack! I'm not apologising!" Jack stood up slowly and carefully before he walked over to face Sam. "You know Samantha…shy don't you just screw the routine, and tell me exactly why you're so pissed." Sam glared, looking him in the eye, desperately trying to stay in control. But she couldn't. "You had sex! You had sex with her! With that bitch! She doesn't deserve you! Why did you have to sleep with her? What about me!" "Oh…And I suppose you and Pete have been perfect little virgins!" "That's different!" "How's it different!" "You were supposed to be my safe bet!" Jack stood silent, in shock. "Oh god…I'm sorry." Sam's voice quivered. "Safe bet? I'm supposed to be your 'safe bet'?!" "I-I" "And when exactly did I tell you this?" "On the Prometheus…when I was there…alone." "What?" "I-I saw you…You told me to…to move on…that you were just a safe bet." "I told you this…when I wasn't there…when you were concussed?" "Yeah." Sam sighed, realising how crazy she was sounding. Jack walked away, pacing the floor of the study. "Is that all I am to you?" "Jack?" "A safe bet?" Sam sniffed and realised she was crying. "…I guess." "Oh great!" Jack quivered, his voice taught with emotion. "When I first started seeing Pete" "Oh here we go!" "When Pete and I got together…It was a lot of fun…I wasn't lonely…I was happy…Even though you knew I was seeing him, you never stopped supporting me…you never told me to hold back…And all that time, I had a memory of you saying 'I'm a safe bet…I'll always be here for you'. I began to think that it was actually you that had said that to me, so I kept seeing Pete…and then he proposed." "Go on." " It took a long time to make that decision…I decided to ask you what you wanted for me. I though ' Oh c'mon it's Jack! He'll talk you out of it! He loves me!'…But you never…you gave me every reason to say yes and then I began to think…maybe you didn't love me." "Samantha" "As time went on…I realised how much of a mistake I was making…I decided to tell you all of this…only to find you here with another woman." Sa" "I've lost you! I love and…I lost you…and it's my own fault!" "Kerry's gone." Sam stopped, shocked by the statement. "What?" "Later that day, when you were visiting your dad, she came to see me… She said she'd noticed how close you and I were, and that she didn't think she could compete with you…She told me if the Air Force is keeping you and I apart, then we're making a big mistake…I agreed." "Jack I'm sorry" "When you and Pete began dating, I didn't see a problem…You were happy. It wasn't serious…or so I thought…The second he knew about the SGC, I began to get worried…Then you told me things were getting very serious and…I realised…You'd fallen for him…and it broke my heart." "Jack" "So I began to think 'No she'll leave him…she'll realise that I love her and that she loves me'…but you and him…you just got more serious… I thought that I could change my feelings for you…but then I realised that you still held my heart, and that there was nothing I could do… Then you showed me that ring!" "Jack please!" "That day, you took out the remains of my heart…the remains of my soul and stomped on it as if it were a piece of shit that was in your way!" "Jack!" "You broke me Sam! You broke me!" "Please Jack! Listen to" "No! You listen!" He bellowed. "How dare you come here and tell me who I can and cannot sleep with…who I can and cannot share my life with…You wanna know why I started seeing Kerry?" Sam nodded solemnly, as Jack began pacing once more. "It was something casual to begin with…We'd meet up after work and discuss staffing issues over a bite to eat. I began to notice she was interested and hell I was more than interested…Kerry's so different to you…she's so open…she's free…Free from the military…Free from regulations…I admired that in her…I admire her…So we began seeing each other and gradually it became more serious. We were sleeping together…spending our downtime together…But I was holding back. As much as I care about her…in the end, it was just sex…I couldn't get involved emotionally no matter how hard I tried, because I'm still in love with you…Kerry noticed before me…I think she noticed a lot earlier than yesterday." "I never realised just hoe much I'd hurt you." Sam whimpered. "Well you did." "I - Oh god! I'm so sorry! I'm such and idiot." "Yeah…but I'll give you this…the most beautiful, most intelligent idiot." Sam giggled slightly, before it dawned on her that once more, Jack was the one trying to build bridges. She became more serious. "Where do we go from here?" She asked. Jack pondered this. "I honestly don't know…I think I can forgive you, but I don't think I can forget." "I don't deserve forgiving Jack…I know I did wrong." "What about Pete?" "I've thought about that, and I think I've strung him along enough… He deserves better…He deserves happiness with someone who actually loves him…That's why I broke up with him before I came over here." Jack paused, absorbing the information. "You - you did?" "Yeah." Jack sighed, wiping away the remnants of his tears. "C'mere." He called. Sam's hands trembled and she shivered violently, before running to the sanctuary of Jack's arms. It was at that point their tears engulfed them, as they cried for the pain they'd inflicted on each other, and cried for the pain they'd received. They stood like that for several minutes, time slowing down around them, rocking each other back and forth. After a long while, they risked looking at each other. "I think we're going to be okay." Jack whispered. "Eventually." "Then let's bring that 'eventually' a little closer." Jack brought his hands up to her face, tracing a line from her temple to her chin. He wiped away her tears and brushed errant strands of hair out of her eyes. Sam traced a delicate line down the centre of Jack's face. Over his forehead, over his nose and down to his mouth. Jack sighed, relaxing a bit more, before he slowly opened his eyes. "I love you Sam." "I love you Jack." At that moment, their lips met in a tender embrace. The kiss deepened and as they sought to find each other, they finally melted together as one. They broke apart in ragged breaths, gasping for air, but not before Jack left delicate trail of kisses running from behind Sam's ear to her shoulder. She moaned slightly and Jack took the leads. His fingers became entwined with hers and he beckoned her out of his study. "C'mon." "Where to?" "To find a hundred ways to screw the regs!" Sam giggled before running after her new-found lover and once-again friend along the hall and to her future.
Story Notes: AUTHOR'S NOTE: This has been on ff.net for a while, but I have massive writer's block, and posting some of my newer stuff in places other than ff.net can help kickstart my writing.
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]