Sam and Janet had been gone about ten minutes, when doorbell rang. Jack picked up his beer before heading to open the front door.
“Hey, Jack!” Daniel greeted as he, Teal’c, Ferretti and Jocelyn’s husband, Ben, made their way into the house. Behind them, a group of SGC personnel jumped out of a troop carrier and made their way up the path.
It wasn’t long before the house was packed with Jack’s friends and colleagues. Even old friends that he hadn’t seen for years had made it for the occasion. Jack was surprised to see Brett Cowley, one of his closest friends from his Special Operations days, turn up on his doorstep. “Brett! What in the hell are you doing here?!” he asked, embracing his friend in a manly hug.
“What? You think I’d miss your bachelor party?” Brett replied. “Man! I can’t believe you’re getting married again! You’d think you’d learned from the first time round!”
Jack chuckled. “When you meet Sam, you’ll understand, buddy.”
Brett grinned, seeing how in love his friend was. A thought came to him and he sobered, his eyes dropping to look at the floor. “I was sorry to hear about Kawalsky. I tried to get here for the funeral, but you know how things are.” He saw the dark cloud pass across Jack’s face, cursing himself for having to bring up such sad memories then.
“Yeah, I know how things are.” He gave a grim little smile. “You would have been proud of him, Brett. He fought hard, and died with honour.”
“That’s how we all want to go,” Brett replied, trying to think of a way to lighten the mood without sounding cold. “Come on, Jack. We can drink to fallen friend’s another time. Let’s celebrate life, love and losing freedom tonight.”
Jack managed a grin as he pushed the picture of Kawalsky’s face in the far corners of his mind, with all the other horror he’d seen in his life. “I’ll drink to that,” he replied.
The doorbell rang again and Daniel opened it, ushering General Hammond and Jacob Carter into the room. “Hey, General, Dad! Glad you could make it!” Jack said as he made his way across the room.
“Wouldn’t miss it for the world, son,” Jacob replied.
“We even brought you a little something,” the General added, handing the younger man a bottle of expensive single malt whiskey. “Save it for a special occasion,” he instructed.
“Thank you, sir,” Jack replied, touched by the gesture.
Jack spent a few minutes wandering around his living room, mingling with the guests. He heard Ferretti speaking and turned to see that he had cornered Daniel. “So, Doctor Jackson. What wonderfully weird pre-wedding rituals do you have for us?” Ferretti asked, slapping the archaeologist’s shoulder.
Daniel chuckled. “Well, let’s see. In many cultures, the bride’s family have to give the groom a dowry. He has to accept the size of the dowry before the wedding takes place.”
Jacob grabbed the bottle of whiskey. “He’s got his dowry!” he called out, making everyone laugh. “That the best you can do, Daniel? This is a bachelor party, you know. And besides, I’m out of cows at the moment.”
Daniel thought for a moment. “Well, we could call on Bastet to ensure the marriage is full of love, sex and fertility if you’d like?”
Jacob almost choked on his beer. Jack raised an eyebrow. “You okay, Jacob?”
“Yeah,” he croaked. “You do realise that Bastet is a...” He looked around the room and remembered that not all of the guests were members of the SGC. “An ancient Egyptian god, don’t you?” The pointed look was not lost on anyone with the necessary clearance.
“Oh,” Daniel stuttered, embarrassed.
Ferretti quickly stepped in before anyone could ask any awkward questions. “Well, Jack. Perhaps you’ll partake in this pre-wedding ritual.” He handed Jack a beer, making everyone laugh. People started talking again and Jack, Daniel, Hammond and Ferretti crowded around Jacob.
“So there’s really a Goa’uld called Bastet?” Daniel asked.
Jacob looked around before nodding. “That there is.”
“Why haven’t we heard of him before?” Hammond asked, concerned of a possible new threat to Earth.
“Bastet’s not really interested in conquering new worlds. Although he does go on ‘recruiting’ missions for his Goa’uld Pleasure Palace.”
“Pleasure palace?” Jack questioned, raising an eyebrow.
“It’s the equivalent of a Goa’uld brothel. He also deals in new hosts for Goa’uld queens. My guess would be he’s aware of how far the Tau’ri have come and doesn’t feel Earth is worth the risk.”
He looked to Jack. “Be careful if you run into him though. He likes beautiful women, especially those with fair skin and hair.”
Jack nodded, understanding Jacob’s warning. If they ran into this guy, Sam would be in danger.
Clearing his throat, Jacob decided it was time to move on to happier topics. “So, when’s the stripper arriving?”
Ferretti actually pouted. “Jack wouldn’t let us hire one.”
“What’s a bachelor party without a stripper?” Jacob questioned with a chuckle.
Ferretti smiled triumphantly. “See! Even General Carter agrees with me!”
“Go and cook us dinner,” Jack ordered, moving away from the group and over to Brett.
“Is this her?” Brett asked, pointing to the picture of Sam and Jack that was sitting on the mantle.
“Yeah, buddy. That’s Sam,” Jack replied with pride.
“You’re kidding, right? She’s a stunner! What’s she doing with you?!” Brett asked, his blue eyes dancing with humour.
Jack laughed. “I ask myself the same question constantly.”
“When do I get to meet her?”
“Come over tomorrow,” Jack replied, taking the bottle of beer that Teal’c handed him. “Late, tomorrow,” he amended, looking at the bottle.
*****
Ferretti eventually got around to cooking the barbecue and they all sat out in the backyard, enjoying the late spring evening. The alcohol was flowing freely and everyone was enjoying themselves immensely. Brett was telling stories of Jack’s younger days, keeping everyone in stitches and Jack in constant embarrassment. “So, we went to meet our contact, who we were told was female and would approach us. So Jack thought nothing of it when this woman walked up to him. She was dressed in next to nothing, but he just assumed it was her cover. So imagine his surprise when he asks her to give him what he wants and she drops his pants in the bar!”
The group of men roared with laughter, enjoying the chance to get one up on Jack. He vowed revenge on any man who breathed a word to anyone.
Chuckling, Jacob placed a hand on Jack’s shoulder, getting his attention. “Jack, George and I are going to go now.”
“Are you sure, Dad?”
Jacob nodded. “We’ll let you younger ones have your fun.” Jack nodded, thanking both men as he followed them inside.
After seeing the two men off, Jack turned to see that everyone had wandered back into the house. “Okay, Jack. I’d like you to meet your date for the evening,” Ferretti announced, a huge grin on his face.
Jack’s eye widened. “You promised, Ferretti! No strippers!”
Ferretti’s grin grew wider. “She’s not a stripper, buddy. And after you meet her, you might just prefer her to the Major.” He nodded to Ben who walked into the room carrying a blow-up doll. A blow-up doll that was wearing a negligée which looked suspiciously like one of Sam’s.
“Did you go through my fiancé’s drawers?” Jack asked, heckles rising.
Ferretti shook his head quickly. “No way! She’d do some serious damage to me if I did that! I asked her if I could borrow something.”
Jack couldn’t help the grin that formed. “And she agreed?”
“Sure did. Now, Jack. I’d like you to meet Cindy. Cindy, this is Jack.” Ben made the doll’s hand move and Jack shook it, laughing.
“Look at her, Jack,” Ferretti enthused, taking the doll off Ben and standing it beside Jack. She came up to waist height. “She can stand on her own two feet, perfect height, and...” He grabbed Jack’s beer and placed it in the hole in the top of the doll’s head. “She’ll hold your drink for you!”
The room exploded with laughter and wolf whistles, along with comments like “she suits you, Jack!” and “she’s closer to your IQ, O’Neill!”
“O’Neill, I do not understand the significance of this doll,” Teal’c said, thoroughly confused by this Tau’ri ritual.
“Well, buddy, I think that Ferretti here is just dyin’ to explain that one.” He slapped Louis on the shoulder. “Ain’t that right, Ferretti?” He walked away, chuckling at his friend’s embarrassed stuttering.
*****
It was getting late, and there were only a few guys left by the time they sat down to a game of shot poker. Instead of money, shots of alcohol were bet, with the losers having to drink the ante. Daniel decided it wouldn’t be wise if he joined in. He was bad enough with beer and knew he’d pass out after one round of shots. He decided to keep count of the bets, to ensure that no one cheated.
Jack sat down at the table, eager to play. He was known as a bit of a card shark and was feeling very confident. Little did he know that Ferretti had organised for him to lose - and lose big time. Drawing Jack into the game, the others deliberately lost a few hands, having to drink a few shots each. Then Ferretti got to work and dealt himself the perfect hand, a royal flush. Giving the signal, the others put a few bets in, just to get the number of shots up, and then folded. Ferretti bet five shots and Jack
matched that, looking at his hand, a full house.
“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Jack exclaimed, seeing the hand his friend laid on the table.
“You’re up, buddy,” Ferretti replied with a smug grin.
Jack threw his hand on the table and then eyed Ben, who was coming toward him with a shot glass and a bottle of tequila. Fifteen shots later, Jack was really starting to feel the alcohol. He’d already consumed a large number of beers that evening and the tequila was just too much. Two hands later, he was slumped forward, head resting on the table and snoring loudly.
Ferretti gave an evil grin. “Okay, now the fun begins!”
Calling a cab, they explained that they were in the middle of a bachelor party prank and the driver happily obliged, driving them across town to where they wanted to go. They piled out, dragging Jack with them and asked the cab driver to wait for them.
Daniel, who wasn’t drunk enough not to care, started getting nervous. “Guys, I promised Sam we wouldn’t do anything too over the top. She’ll kill us if we have to call her to come bail us.”
“What she don’t know, won’t hurt her,” Ferretti replied as he removed Jack’s shoes.
Before long, Jack was stripped to his boxers and handcuffed to the lamp post. The guys raced off towards the waiting cab once he started to come around. His eyes snapped open when he realised he couldn’t move. “Ferretti!” he called, trying to ignore the looks he was receiving from passers-by. “I’m gonna kill you when I get hold of you!”
Louis just waved and dragged Daniel into the waiting cab. “Have a nice night, Jack!” were his parting words.
Jack wasn’t sure how long he’d stayed there, unable to do anything but smile at the people that yelled and cheered at him from the passing cars. The worst thing was, the lamp post was right next to a set of traffic lights. That meant people could sit there and look at him while they waited for the lights to change. One woman even jumped out of her car and came to give him a kiss, cheered on by her waiting friends.
He watched a cab pull up at the red light. He closed his eyes, praying the lights wouldn’t take long to change. It seemed his prayers were answered as he heard the car move off, only to hear it pull up as it rounded the corner. Jack kept his eyes closed. He wasn’t sure whether to be relieved or not. On one hand it could be someone to help him. On the other, it could be the guys coming back to do something else to him.
He heard someone running and his eyes snapped open when he heard a very familiar voice. “Jack?!”
“Sam! Thank God! I was sure I was gonna be arrested soon.”
“What happened?” she asked, giggling.
“Stop laughing and help me!” Jack replied, turning around to show her the handcuffs.
Sam fished her nail file out of her bag and got to work. “So, you gonna tell me what happened?”
“Ferretti’s idea, no doubt. I was kinda incapacitated at the time, so I don’t remember.”
Sam was laughing so hard she could barely see the lock she was trying to pick.
“I might have something to cut those with in the cab,” the driver told them.
“No need,” Sam replied, unlocking one of the cuffs.
“How did you do that?” The guy was obviously impressed.
“Trade secret,” Jack replied, pulling Sam into a quick hug. “Thanks. Can we get out of here before someone sees us?” he implored. Sam giggled and led Jack to the cab.
By the time they got home, they were necking like teenagers. Thankfully the cab driver didn’t mind, wishing them luck and graciously accepting a healthy tip for his help. They made their way to the front door and Jack grabbed Sam’s keys, letting them both in.
Sam closed the door and looked at the mess that was her living room. She had to laugh when she saw the blow-up doll, still wearing her negligée. “So, am I going to lose you to a four foot tall drink holder?”
“Not a chance,” he replied, leading her away from the mess and up the stairs. “I can’t believe you gave Ferretti your lingerie.”
Sam laughed. “You should have seen him. He was sure I was going to hit him or something. He was so nervous, I just couldn’t say no.”
Sam followed Jack into their bedroom, kicking off her shoes. “Are you drunk?” she asked, giving his half naked body an appreciative look.
“Not really. Getting tied up in your underwear kinda has a way of sobering you up. Why do you ask?”
Sam unzipped her dress. “Because you look so sexy standing there in your boxers,” she told him before her mouth joined with his.
*****
I've always been in trouble
With the boy inside the man
Yes he loves to have a good time
He's so good at being bad
Oh yeah I wouldn't fight it
I wouldn't fight it even if I knew how
Oh no you couldn't stop us
We're making all the noise
Boys will be boys
Boys will be boys
You know they don't have a choice
Boys will be boys
Boys will be boys
*****
COMING SOON- Songbook Series 14: Love Is A Gift
Story Notes: Songbook Series 13: AUTHOR: Jez- jez80@ozemail.com.au
SPOILERS: The Enemy Within
ARCHIVE: Sam and Jack and Heliopolis please.
AUTHORS NOTES: A huge thanks to my two beta gal's, Kes and Jenn!
FEEDBACK: Very much appreciated and cherished.
SPOILERS: The Enemy Within
ARCHIVE: Sam and Jack and Heliopolis please.
AUTHORS NOTES: A huge thanks to my two beta gal's, Kes and Jenn!
FEEDBACK: Very much appreciated and cherished.
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]