Colonel Carter stood in the doorway observing him silently. She’d often seen him at work under pressure and admired his command skill, but she’d never actually watched him at peace. It seemed strange to see him like this now after everything that had happened to them in the past 24 hours. Only an hour ago, they’d almost been blown up again by some weapon of Anubis’ and, via some divine intervention which may or may not have been Daniel, they’d survived. Peace seemed to be something hard to come by these days what with the Replicators’ rapid invasion of the galaxy. Although in an ironic twist of fate, this invasion had worked in their favour, successfully distracting the System Lords and giving the rebel Jaffa time to secure Dakara and her and her father time to activate the Ancient weapon.
Her Father.
He’d held on as long as he could and she didn’t hate him for keeping it from her. In a way she was relieved he’d died here and not on some distant Tok’Ra planet billions of light-years away. It had given her the chance to say good bye properly. He’d been there for her of course. Silent and strong. It seemed strange she should feel so safe and protected in his company. A heavy restriction on their personal relationship had set them apart but over the years they’d spent together as CO and 2IC, they’d grown closer through a series of surreptitious glances, secret smiles and rare occasions that required more than a comforting word. She’d known from the first breath she’d taken in his presence that she cared for him deeper than any other human being she’d ever met. It seemed only natural she should love him as deep as she did and it seemed that way to everyone else around them. Her father had told her this on his death bed, and she’d tried to interpret his words into a much broader context. But she’d known exactly what he’d meant as sure as he knew exactly what she wanted.
It was with a natural ease she’d relaxed into his arms, letting him be there for her. After everything she’d been through, the regulations seemed to fade slightly. At first, she’d wondered why she hadn’t pushed him away. After all he was still her CO. But since her isolation on the Prometheus a year before, she seemed to be making changes without a conscious decision. It had been getting progressively harder to conceal her feelings for him. They seemed to be getting into more life threatening situations with Anubis around and who knew how long their luck would last? SG-1 were still the only team who hadn’t lost a team member (ascension not included). The last straw had been in which Janet Fraser had been killed and Jack mortally wounded. She’d broken down completely, forgetting her Air Force training and had ended up in his arms sobbing openly. With quiet understanding, he’d held her.
She knew then she had to move on.
If moving on was easy, it came in the shape of one Pete Shanahan. He was sweet and made her forget Jack and the SGC for a while. But she knew, as with any conquest or project, the happiness she felt was only a distraction, a placebo. She could never love him as she loved Jack and this realisation had been made abruptly clear when Pete had asked her to marry him. Though she’d tried to be happy in a normal life with him, she knew she couldn’t lie to Pete for the sake of her own delusions.
She hadn’t thought how it would affect Jack either. She thought he’d just always be there. So it came as a huge slap in the face to learn he’d been seeing someone else without telling her. She’d scolded herself then. Why should he tell her? Hadn’t it been him who’d enquired about Pete?
She shifted uncomfortably, the wooden panel of the doorway digging into an old scar on her arm. The same scar he’d diverted from her heart. How many times had he saved her life? And how many times she his? Didn’t they deserve a little happiness after they’d cheated death so many times?
He looked up from his desk. His chocolate brown eyes betrayed the tiredness they’d both felt over the past 8 years. Tired of fighting. Tired of surviving instead of living. Tired of lying to themselves. Tired of being denied each other.
“Carter?”
God she’d give anything to tell him. To collapse by his side and give herself completely over to him. She knew he felt the same. She could see it in his eyes. But instead, she took a deep breath, pushed everything back beneath the surface of her soul and said: “Sgt Siler says the Gate wasn’t heavily damaged, though it could do with a good diagnostic or two.
He blinked and sat back in his chair rubbing his forehead. “Tell Siler he can play with the Gate as long as he puts it back exactly as he found it.” She smiled weakly and nodded. “Yes Sir”.
Turning to leave, she heard a small intake of breath and then, much quieter: “Carter”
She turned, holding her breath. He stood up and moved around the desk towards her. A familiar flutter tickled her stomach, leaving her weak in the knees. It was the same feeling she got every time they got so close. She looked up not daring to look into his eyes. She knew she’d drown in them.
“Y’Okay?”
Breathing deeply, she debated for one wild moment whether to tell him she was sick of pretending he didn’t mean anything to her and that he either take her now or she’d leave through the gate and never come back. But as always, she replied: “Yes Sir”.
Tilting her head back, he gazed deep into her eyes as if reading her very soul. She stared back, amazed and flattered that such a man could reciprocate her feelings. Somehow he knew exactly what was wrong. “One day when all this is over…”
Feeling a deeper understanding of everything that happened and the depth of what he was saying, she felt safe once again. “Or maybe when the damn Jaffa decide to get rid of that huge honking space gun back there in Jaffa land.”
The End
Story Notes: Spoilers: Threads, Reckoning Pts1 and 2,Grace, Heroes Pts 1 and 2, Chimera.
Season/sequel: Set during Threads, scene before the meeting at the end.
Author's notes: This came from a challenge laid down by a fellow shipper, sorry I can’t remember who( you know who you are). I love Threads so this kind of wrote it’s self!
Dedication: This ones for Ruth. Without her, I wouldn’t have seen season 8 as it aired! Thank You!
Season/sequel: Set during Threads, scene before the meeting at the end.
Author's notes: This came from a challenge laid down by a fellow shipper, sorry I can’t remember who( you know who you are). I love Threads so this kind of wrote it’s self!
Dedication: This ones for Ruth. Without her, I wouldn’t have seen season 8 as it aired! Thank You!
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]