The SG-1 team was totally, completely drenched. The storm had just showed up out of nowhere--one minute the skies of the planet had been a pleasant blue, dotted with white poofy clouds, and the next black and purple cumulus monsters rolled in and tried to drown them. All four trudged through the brush in single file, pushing branches back and bending small trees out of their path. The rain sluiced down in heavy sheets, practically blinding the team. They struggled through the heavy mud, Teal'c having to pull Daniel out of sinkholes by the top of his pack several times. Their packs were at least ten pounds heavier soaked with all the rain water. Carter grimaced as a waterlogged branch that Daniel had pushed back almost knocked her over. To make matters really interesting, her CO was not ready to admit that they were lost.
"Sir!" Carter called up to the head of the line. "Could we take a look at the map for just a second?"
"Not necessary Major," O'Neill called back. "The stargate is just ahead over this hill." He stifled a laugh that was threatening to sneak out and betray his total enjoyment of their situation. He just loved doing this to them. They'd actually been walking in circles for about two hours now. It was just too good a chance to pass up--the pouring rain, the mud, pretending to be lost...He had a pretty accurate idea of where they were. They hadn't wandered far from the gate. He just wanted to see how long it would take for someone to say something. Teal'c would walk until his legs fell off without complaining, so it was between Carter and Daniel. Daniel had started the third time he got stuck in the mud. This was the first time Carter had spoken up. She'd have to be really miserable to say anything--she was just as tough as he was. "We're almost there!" he yelled over the pounding rain.
"That's what you said a half an hour ago!" Daniel shouted. "Sam's right! Let's just look at the map for a minute and get our bearings!"
Jack grinned and decided to have mercy. "Daniel, I know where we are! Keep moving. The gate is just ahead." He was getting pretty uncomfortable himself. He started in the general direction of the gate. Oh to see the look on their faces when they got back to the gate and realized they'd been walking around it for the last hour..."I promise we're almost there!"
Yeah, right, Carter grumbled inwardly. Typical. He could never admit he was lost. She could have sworn they passed that boulder an hour back...Sam wiped water out of her eyes with one soggy gloved hand. She was tired, wet, cold, and hungry, and she felt like *really* needed to go to the bathroom. Okay, no more bitching and moaning, she reminded herself sternly. Just suck it up and put one foot in front of the other...we'll get there soon...just ignore that annoying pressure in your stomach...if the Colonel can do this, I can do this...I'm just as tough as he his...
She walked slowly, stopping short to yank her foot out of a mudhole. That was the fifth time her foot had sunk down in the mud, all the way up to her calf. She gritted her teeth. The pep talk continued. "You've been in worse situations than this...basic training, for instance...this is a piece of cake, a walk in the park...think hot bath, warm food, name all the elements in the Periodic Table, anything but the building discomfort in my nether regions..." she muttered.
Savage pain suddenly ripped through her abdomen.
Sam gasped and clutched at her stomach, her legs almost buckling underneath her. She grabbed at a tree trunk nearby to steady herself. "Major Carter, is there something wrong?" Teal'c called out, seeing her stumble to the side. She didn't even hear him. The pain was unbelievable--it was like someone was twisting her inside out, shoving a knife in her body and jerking it around. Even menstrual cramps weren't as bad as this. She started to shake and tremble, and slumped to the ground into a quivering ball. This wasn't menstrual cramps. Something was very, very wrong.
"O'Neill! Something is wrong with Major Carter!" Teal'c shouted above the pounding rain. He stopped and knelt down beside her, laying down his staff weapon. He gently touched her shoulder. "Major Carter, are you injured?"
She couldn't form coherent sentences. She just started to writhe in agony on the ground, trying desperately not to throw up from the pain. "God, my...my..." she trailed off and bit back a cry of pain, managing to keep it to a whimper.
Teal'c leaned over her, trying to shield her from the torrential downpour. "Major Carter, what is wrong?"
She squeezed her eyes shut and curled into a tight fetal position, wrapping her arms around her stomach. "My...my...stomach...Teal'c...help me..." she managed to gasp.
Teal'c touched her stomach gently. "Here, Major? Is this where you are injured?" She curled into a tighter ball on the muddy ground, no longer able to answer.
"Carter?" Jack said, hurrying to her fallen form. Shit, shit, shit, see what your stupid practical joke did...He leaned down beside her and looked to her ankle for the problem. "Did you hurt your foo--" He stopped short when he saw her face underneath her helmet. She looked positively ashen. "Daniel, get out the map *now*." He needed an exact location, no more guesswork. Daniel quickly reached into one of his pants pockets and took out his map, scanning for their location relative to the gate. He shot his gaze around their vicinity, looking for contour lines that matched the map.
"We're just thirty meters due east from the gate," Daniel said quickly.
"Carter, can you walk?" Jack asked. No answer, just groans of pain. Jack looked up at Teal'c. "Teal'c, carry her." Without a word Teal'c slid his arms underneath Carter's curled up form and cradled her to his barrel chest. Carter cried out at the jostling of her body.
"Do not worry, Major Carter," Teal'c reassured her. "I will carry you."
"Daniel, lead the way," Jack ordered. "Let's move!" He grabbed Teal'c's staff weapon and followed the Jaffa, who was carrying his second in command like she was made of glass. Dammit, this was just supposed to be a joke...
The welcome sight of the dry SGC gate room greeted the team as they stepped out of the wormhole. "Medic!" Daniel called urgently. "We need a medical team!"
General Hammond slapped the intercom in the control room. "What happened?" His voice boomed into the gateroom.
"Carter's injured! Get a med team in here now!" Jack shouted, hearing the voice in his head that was telling him it was all his fault.
The doors opened and orderlies rushed in. Teal'c moved quickly towards the medical team entering the gate room and carefully laid Carter's curled body on the gurney. Dr. Janet Fraiser barked out orders to her staff, the worry on her face almost masked by her professionalism.
"What happened?" Janet asked, moving her team quickly down the hallway towards the infirmary.
"I do not know. Major Carter collapsed and was not able to walk," Teal'c answered. "Colonel O'Neill requested that I carry her to the stargate."
"Sam? Sam, can you hear me?" Janet leaned over the gurney. "Can you tell me what happened?"
"Hurts...my ab..." Carter gasped, clutching her stomach.
"What hurts, Sam? Tell me what hurts," Janet said urgently.
"My..abdomen...hurts...feels like...bad cramps...Janet..."
"It's okay, Sam, just breath. Okay? Keep breathing," Janet encouraged her as they rounded into the infirmary. Teal'c stopped at the door and watched as the medical team began to work. He turned around and stood at attention when they began to cut Carter's soaked fatigues off her body.
Jack and Daniel rounded the corrider to the infirmary at a run, leaving wet, muddy bootprints all over the hallway. They almost ran into Teal'c, who practically blocked the whole doorway.
"What's happening? What's wrong with her?" Daniel tried to look over Teal'c shoulder, craning his neck.
"I do not know, Daniel Jackson. Dr. Frasier and her team are endeavoring to find out. They are removing Major Carter's clothing. Therefore we will wait." Teal'c looked straight ahead and continued to block the doorway, along with any sort of view of the activity going on inside. There was a pause, then the sound of dripping water filled the hallway.
"Uh, Jack?"
"Yeah?"
"We seem to be...standing in a puddle."
They all looked down at their feet. There was the beginnings of a small pond on the floor.
Jack lifted up a muddy boot. Janet was going to be pissed at this mess in front of her infirmary. "All right. Get cleaned up," he ordered. "General wants a briefing in an hour." Where I tell him this was all my fault, he thought viciously.
Staff Briefing Room, 1600 hours.
"Sir, this is my fault." Jack leaned forward onto the table, clasping his hands together. "I was...performing a strenuous training exercise, unbeknownest to the team."
"You were WHAT?" Daniel looked at Jack, his brows furrowed in anger. "You mean you had us walking in circles in the pouring rain for almost two hours for FUN! Did you know where the gate was the whole time?"
"In a matter of speaking, yes." Jack looked at Daniel, seeing his disbelief. "I knew where we were, Daniel."
"How long were you going to let us wander around in the woods? Until one of us drowned?"
"No Daniel, I was leading us back to the gate just before Carter fell! I had no intention of being out there for longer than an hour or two! Do you think I would have done it if I'd known something was wrong with her?" Jack snapped.
"Is it not the Colonel's perogative as commander of this team to perform training exercises whenever he deems fit?" asked Teal'c. "This is the mark of a good leader, to keep his team as fit as possible and always ready for battle, is it not?"
"Thanks Teal'c but Daniel's right. It was stupid." Jack said, waving his hand at the big Jaffa.
"Yes it was, Colonel," Hammond said tersly.
The door opened and Janet walked in, a slightly uncomfortable look on her face. Everyone rose. Jack immediately spoke up. "Is Carter--"
"She's fine," Janet said, taking a seat, waving them down. "She's going to be in some pain for a few days, but we'll keep her on anti inflammatories for a week and she should be back on duty within the next two weeks."
Hammond spoke, concern evident in his features. "Can you tell us what happened, Doctor?"
Janet cleared her throat. "Well, sir, I don't know exactly how much I should say."
General Hammond furrowed his brow. "Is the injury of a personal nature?"
"Well, yes," Janet responded.
Jack looked at Janet in confusion. "I thought she hurt her ankle or her leg or something."
Janet took a breath and looked around the room. All the men sitting around this table were very, very concerned about Major Carter. General Hammond, Teal'c, Daniel, and Jack wanted some answers. Janet saw just how fiercly protective of Sam they were. Especially Jack. He looked like he was about ready to take off running down to the infirmary. Right now, when she was injured, Sam wasn't just "one of the guys." The male instinct to protect the female of the tribe (even when that woman was just as capable as the men) was still something that women had to deal with, and no amount of basic training or military experience could alter basic biology. They needed to know that their teammate was all right. Janet would take responsibility for the fallout from Sam for her disclosure.
She put on her professional mask. "Major Carter suffered from a ruptured cyst in her right ovary." As soon as she said it, every male in the room, with the exception of Teal'c, turned a shade paler. She pushed onwards. "The condition isn't life threatening, but as you can imagine it is extremely painful and debilitating. Major Carter will require complete bedrest for the next day or so, and leave from off world duties for another few days. I'll want to keep an eye on her to make sure the ruptured cyst reabsorbes into her body, and under no circumstances should she do any strenuous physical activity for the next few weeks." At the work "strenuous," Jack looked down and closed his eyes briefly.
"Doctor, what caused this...rupture?" asked Hammond.
She shrugged. "It's hard to say. Often these cysts form and just burst on their own, and it's not unusual for women to experience one or two or even three in their lifetime. It's only when there are numurous cysts that we have to worry."
"Could *strenuous* physical activity have caused it to rupture?" Jack asked.
Janet looked at him. "Well it wouldn't have helped." Jack looked away. "But if the cyst was going to rupture, it would have done it anywhere at anytime, not necessarily because of the physical activity. It could have happened when she was in her lab, or driving home. "
"Thank you, Doctor," Hammond said. "I appreciate your candor." Janet nodded and rose from the table, wishing she didn't have to be so damn candid.
"Can we see her?" Daniel asked.
"Not right now," Janet replied. "She really needs rest. She's on heavy pain killers, so she's not awake anyway." Seeing Daniel's disappointment, she added, "I'll let you know when she wakes up."
"Thanks, I'd appreciate that," Daniel responded gratefully. She nodded and left the room.
"Well, gentlemen," Hammond said, "It looks like you're on stand down until Major Carter recovers. Take a few days rest. Dismissed." They all rose to leave. "Colonel, stay a moment." Jack stopped and waited until the rest of the team filed out the door. Daniel threw him a look over his shoulder just before he left, as if to say, "I hope the General reams you a new one." Jack had to agree. He deserved whatever the General dished out.
"Colonel, what you did was stupid, infantile and completely inappropriate," Hammond said brusquely.
"Yes sir," Jack replied, standing at attention.
"It showed a lack of respect for your team, and you are damn lucky no one else was seriously injured." Hammond's voice rang in the briefing room. He paused, then sat down at the table again. "And, it wasn't your fault."
Jack looked at his superior. "Sir?"
"I know what your're thinking, son. What happened to Major Carter wasn't your fault. You had no way of knowing about her condition, and you heard what Dr. Frasier said. It could have happened anywhere."
"That doesn't excuse the fact that I put her in the situation, sir."
"No, it doesn't. But you were treating her like every other member of your team, regardless of gender. Am I correct?"
"Yes sir, but--"
Hammond interrupted. "Look son, I know you objected to her being on the team in the beginning. And you can't say that it was only because she was a scientist. Women in the military have to do twice as much and try twice as hard as men to get the same amount of respect. It's a terrible double standard. But since Carter and you have been on the same team, I have noticed that you haven't maintained that double standard. You've treated her with the same amount of respect and admiration that you accord your male officers, and maybe even more. I'm not condoning your little training exercise--which is just a fancy phrase for a practical joke--but I am telling you not to wallow in your own guilt. You had no way of knowing. Understood, Colonel?"
Jack looked straight ahead. "Understood, sir."
"Good. Dismissed."
Jack turned and left the briefing room, and headed straight for the infirmary.
Infirmary, 1630 hrs.
Jack poked his head through the door of the infirmary, scanning the room for any sign of Janet. Good, all clear. He walked carefully over to Carter's bed and stared at her sleeping face, breathing a mental sigh of relief at her peaceful expression. His stomach had tied itself in knots when he'd seen her in so much pain. The voice started up again. It's all your fault, you know, he berated himself silently. Slogging through ankle length mud with a thirty pound pack on...Jesus Christ...
"Colonel?" said a soft voice.
Shit, he was caught. He looked up at Janet's face.
"Sir, you really shouldn't be here. She needs to rest," she admonished him gently.
Jack looked down at Carter's face again. "Yeah. I just wanted to...check on her. Make sure she was sleeping okay."
Janet smiled. "She's fine, Colonel. It seems a lot worse than it actually is. She'll be up and around in no time."
"She looked...really bad. Back there on the planet."
"She looks okay now, right sir?"
Jack paused and looked at Sam, seeing the even rise and fall of her chest, her smooth forehead, her relaxed hands. "Yeah."
"Why don't you get some rest, sir?" Janet asked. "You look like you need it."
"Yeah," he said absently, still staring at Carter. "You'll tell me when she wakes up?"
"You'll be the first to know."
Jack nodded, and walked reluctantly out of the infirmary. He wasn't likely to get much sleep tonight.
Infirmary, 0900 hours.
Sam felt like hell.
She had awoken from her drug-induced rest with the sorest abdomen she'd ever had in her entire life. Even getting punched in the stomach didn't hold much of a candle to it. She winced as she tried to move. She felt weak. Above all things, she hated nothing more than feeling weak. Her entire career was built on not being weak! Weak and helpless. Helpless, weak, useless--dammit, she was going to have to call for someone to help her to the bathroom...
"Janet!" she called weakly. What time was it? She had no idea. Okay, bathroom was becoming a real problem. Sam eased herself up to a sitting position. "Janet!"
Janet came towards her quickly, holding her down. "Sam, it's okay. Just lie back down."
"I have to go to the bathroom!"
"Okay, okay," Janet said soothingly. "Here, use the bedpan." She handed Sam the metal pan from under the bed.
"Janet, just help me to the toilet. I'm not using one of those things."
"You should stay as still as possible," Janet ordered. "Moving will be very painful."
"I don't care. Help me to the bathroom, or I'll crawl."
Janet blew out an exasperated breath. "You are so stubborn sometimes. Fine. But don't come crying to me when you want a higher dose of painkillers." She gently eased Sam up to a standing position and put Sam's right arm over her shoulders. "I told you so," she scolded when her patient hissed in pain.
"Shut up and help me walk," Sam grumbled.
They made it to the bathroom and back without incident, although Janet slightly overestimated how much weight she could hold up--Sam was a solidly built woman. Janet was much shorter than her friend, so it was a little awkward. But they made it, albeit with a lot of moaning and groaning on Sam's part.
"Janet, what happened to me?" Sam asked after Janet tucked her back in to bed. She rubbed her stomach gingerly.
"You had a ruptured cyst in your right ovary," Janet explained. "Don't worry, it sounds worse than it actually is. How's the pain?"
"Not as bad as before. It just kind of aches now. How did I rupture a cyst? I didn't even know I had one."
"You couldn't have known until it ruptured. Don't worry," Janet reassured her, "It will be reabsorbed into your body and the pain should go away very soon. In the meantime, you are restricted to the infirmary for the next 24 hours. I want to make sure you get plenty of rest," she said firmly, seeing Sam start to protest. "Sam, no arguments. Even though these things aren't life threatening, I don't want you to be straining yourself. You need rest. Don't make me strap you to the bed," she teased.
"This is so embarrassing," Sam grumbled. "I couldn't have twisted an ankle or wrenched my knee. I have to rupture an ovarian cyst," she spat. Her eyes widened. "Janet, did you tell them?" Seeing Janet's guilty face told her the answer. "Oh god..." Sam leaned her head back and closed her eyes with a grimace.
"Sam, I'm sorry. I know it's embarrassing, but they were all really worried about you. I didn't know what else to say." She paused at Sam's groan of humiliation. "Look, think of it as if one of the guys passed a stone or something. You had a medical condition unique to your gender. It's a little mortifying, but nothing to get upset about."
"Nothing to get upset about! Janet, they all--"
"--were worried out of their minds about you," Janet finished. "Look Sam, you and I both know what it's like. We are women in the military. To the less enlightened, that phrase is an oxymoron. But this incident isn't going to change the respect that your team feels for you. You are one of the best officers on this base, male or female, and that won't change. Just try and rest, and don't worry about it. Your condition won't be revealed beyond your team and General Hammond. Okay?" She rubbed Sam's hand reassuringly.
Sam sighed. She was honestly too tired to get really worked up about it now. "Okay."
"Good," Janet smiled. "Now how about some soup?" Before she could answer, Daniel and Teal'c poked their heads into the room.
"Sam? Can we come in?" Daniel asked hesitantly. "One of the orderlies paged us and told us you were awake."
Sam smiled. "Yes, please, come on in."
"Just a few minutes, Daniel," Janet said. "I'll go get you some soup, okay? I'll be right back."
Sam nodded and smiled gratefully. "Thanks Janet. Teal'c, thank you for...um, carrying me back. I'm sorry you had to do that."
"It was no trouble, Major Carter. I am pleased to see you are well."
"Yeah, we were all pretty worried about you," Daniel said. "How's your...ah..your injury?"
Sam sighed. "It's still pretty sore. But it's better." She paused. "Where's the Colonel?"
"He said he had to run some errand," Daniel shrugged. "But he wanted me to tell you that he hopes you feel better, and not to worry."
"Worry?" Sam furrowed her brow. "Worry about what?"
"He said to tell you that he doesn't consider you any less of a man," Teal'c rumbled.
Sam cracked a smile. "Well that *is* comforting."
"Is this a private party?" A familiar voice called from over the doorway. They all turned to see at least ten or fifteen shiny, bobbing "Get Well" helium balloons stuffed in the doorway, completely obscuring Jack's face. He walked forward, one hand behind his back while the other jerked the balloons through the door, almost knocking several IV stands over in the process. "I got you some balloons. They always made me feel better when I was sick. They're shiny." He handed the bundle to Sam, Teal'c and Daniel dodging to the side to avoid getting smacked in the face. "I figured, you know, you could tie 'em to your bed or something."
"Uh, thank you sir. They're very...pretty," Sam said, looking up at the myriad of floating balloons up her bed. Christ. There had to be almost twenty balloons up there. She'd be surprised if the bed didn't fly away. "Was this the errand that Daniel told me about?"
Jack looked at Daniel. "Yeah, part of it."
"What's the other part?" Sam asked suspiciously.
Jack carefully moved the other hand out from behind his back and presented her with the gaudiest flower assortment she had ever seen. Tigerlilies, big as her head, drooped down next to bright purple and yellow orchids. White and red carnations, daisies, and long pink snapdragons were stuffed next to black eyed susans, with two full bloomed red roses nestled in the middle of the arrangement. "I didn't know what kind you liked, so I figured I'd cover my bases."
"Sir, you really didn't have to do this."
"Hey, no big deal. Thought it might cheer you up."
"Yeah, if that won't, nothing will," said Daniel, starting to tear up from the flowers. "Sam, I'm better go before I start sneezing. Allergies," he said apologetically. "Feel better, okay?"
"Thank you. Both of you," she smiled at Daniel and Teal'c, who was staring at his reflection in the balloons.
"Daniel Jackson, please explain these 'balloons'. What are their function?" Teal'c asked, poking one and jerking back as the whole bunch moved.
"I'll explain it on the way to the locker room," Daniel said, sneezing. He made a beeline for the door, wiping his eyes. Teal'c inclined his head to Jack and Sam and followed Daniel out.
"You look better," Jack commented. "How are you feeling?"
"Better, thanks." Sam frowned. "Sir, it's not like I don't appreciate the gesture, but..." she gestured at the flowers and the balloons. "Isn't it a little bit much?" As soon as she said it, she regretted it. For someone so smart, you really are stupid, she chided herself. He's trying to be nice, you moron! Say thank you!
Jack looked at the ridiculous arrangement. He shrugged. "Yeah, you're probably right. I'll give the flowers to General Hammond."
"Sir, it's okay. I...I really appreciate it. It was a little unexpected, that's all. The flowers are pretty. Thank you." She smiled.
Jack felt his stomach drop into his shoes when she flashed him one of her rare full smiles. "Hey, I would have done it for any member on my team."
"Would you?"
"What?"
Sam took a breath. "Would you have gone to all this trouble for Teal'c or Daniel?"
Jack looked at her for a second, and lied through his teeth. "Sure. That's just the kinda guy I am."
"Sir..."
"Okay, okay. No. But not for the reasons you think. Daniel's allergic to flowers and Teal'c would try and kill the balloons. You are the only one who would really appreciate them," Jack reasoned. Yeah, that's right. Keep justifying.
"I don't want this...incident to affect how I'm treated with the team," Sam stated firmly. "I'm not going to break down on the next mission."
"Hey, you'll be running rings around us on the next planet," he smiled. "This was just a minor setback."
"I just hate feeling so..."
"Weak?" he finished.
"Yeah. Janet's about ready to up my pain killers so I'll stop complaining," she quipped. They both sat in silence for a moment. Sam fought the urge to tell him how helpless she really had felt back on the planet, when the pain was so bad she couldn't even think straight. She hated it. She wanted to tell him how scared she was, how completely terrified she'd felt, but she couldn't allow herself that vulnerability. She was too vulnerable around him already.
"This...this doesn't make you weak. It makes you human."
She looked up at him, slightly surprised. He paused. "Carter, look. I want to apologize for getting you into the situation in the first place. I...uh...was playing a stupid practical joke on you guys, and...I knew we were close to the gate. I was just seeing how long you and Daniel could go before you lost it."
"I knew that."
"What? You did?"
She nodded. "I was seeing how long it would take for you to admit you needed to look at the map."
"Carter, remind me never to underestimate you again."
Sam grinned. "Oh, don't worry sir. I will."
Jack shook his head. "I better go and let you get some rest. Do you need anything? Hot water bottle? Deck of cards? Cosmo magazine?"
Sam chuckled, then winced as her insides jostled. "No sir, thanks. Janet's coming back with some soup in a minute, and then I think I'll just go back to sleep."
"Okay." He paused. "Carter, I'm really glad you're okay," he said softly, cupping her hand and squeezing it gently.
With that simple touch, something shifted. Sam felt..relief. Like it was okay to let someone hold her hand. His hand felt good on hers. It didn't make her feel the bad weak, the helpless, needy weak that she'd felt before. Sam recognized this kind of weak. It was the kind of weak that made her insides turn to jelly, her knees wobble, her stomach flutter. It was the all too familiar sense of weakness she'd been feeling lately around her commanding officer. But right now, she just didn't have the willpower to pretend to be unaffected for the sake of regulations. She squeezed back.
The End!
Feedback me, pwetty pwease, at queenmab31@hotmail.com
Story Notes: NOTES: Okay, this is my first Stargate fic, and I'm not too happy with it. I just wanted to see what would happen if the team was reminded of the "subtle" differences between Carter and the rest, because they do a good job of keeping her equal and strong. Plus I needed some way to procrastinate on my Division 3 work, which at my alternative college for granola crunchers means my senior thesis. Feedback will be loved and cherished and swooned over. :) Oh, it also takes place in season 4 where there was lots of happy shippy-ness, obviously before Daniel left.
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]