His Plan and Her Project by Blue Topaz

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Story Notes: His and Hers 07: SERIES: 7th story in 'His and Hers' < www.geocities.com/bluetopazfic/index#hah >

Note: Thanks to Rosemary who beta-read this. Also to all of those wonderful reviewers. I was a bit weary that most of the readers already forgot about this fic already, seeing I haven't uploaded for a while. And special thanks for those people who tried their hand at the bloopers. They were wonderful (although I *might* have to put R/NC-17 as the rating ;) ) On with the story ...

URL of this story (for better formatting):
www.geocities.com/bluetopazfic/hisandhers7.htm
http://fly.to/bluetopazfic/

EMAIL: blue-topaz@lycos.com

His and Hers 07: His Plan and Her Project

*Sunday, 13 July 2003*

23.10: Sam Carter

Sir? Are you still alive?

How did the plan go?

Did you asked for Siler's help?

Did Janet find out?

Is Daniel alright?

23.11: Jack O'Neill

Oh, hello Carter.

Nice to hear from you too. How are you?

How's the ride?

23.11: Sam Carter

I'm fine. Great in fact. The ride was perfect; I had such a good time.

Now I've answered your questions, it's your turn to answer mine.

23.11: Jack O'Neill

Bossy.

And don't worry. Daniel is fine, Janet didn't find out and Siler had nothing to do with it. And oh yeah, I'm still very much alive.

23.11: Sam Carter

So? What happened?

23.11: Jack O'Neill

Nothing.

23.11: Sam Carter

Sir, please. You cannot expect me to let it go just like that. So, please do tell.

23.11: Jack O'Neill

No Carter, you don't get it. Nothing happened. I figured that Daniel had just bothered me and he knew it. If I took any action today, he would know that it was me, with or without evidence. So, I decided to lay low for a few days and then when he least expects it, I'll strike.

23.12: Sam Carter

Good thinking.

23.12: Jack O'Neill

Yeah, besides I need your help after all. Janet trusts you, a lot. Better you than Siler. Easier too.

It should be a walk in the park.

23.12: Sam Carter

I've said it before and I’ll say it again.

No, I will not help you.

23.12: Jack O'Neill

Carter, your bike is still not safe, you know.

23.12: Sam Carter

Well Sir, you can't blackmail me with that, you already did that yesterday.

23.12: Jack O'Neill

So?

23.12: Sam Carter

You can't use the bike to threaten me again. You already used it once.

23.12: Jack O'Neill

So?

23.12: Sam Carter

Fine, if that's how you want to play it, then I won't fix any of your toys anymore if they got broken.

23.12: Jack O'Neill

You can't do that. If I have nothing to occupy me then I'll bother you. See, your threat will only backfire.

23.13: Sam Carter

Damn it.

I never thought if that.

23.13: Jack O'Neill

Well, you should.

Anyway, I'll tell you more about my plan when I finish plotting it.

23.13: Sam Carter

Sir, I'm not going to help you.

23.13: Jack O'Neill

Sure, you're not.

23.13: Sam Carter

I mean it.

23.13: Jack O'Neill

Yeah, yeah. You can say what you want, but when the time comes, you'll be by my side, helping me with this plan.

23.13: Sam Carter

Colonel, don't you know the meaning of the word 'no'?

23.13: Jack O'Neill

Of course I do, but not if it come out from you. I'm going to sleep.

Goodnight Carter. See you tomorrow.

23.13: Sam Carter

Colonel O'Neill, Sir, please. I said 'no'.

23.13: Jack O'Neill

Night night.

23.13: Sam Carter

Colonel! I'm not going to help you with this.

23.14: Jack O'Neill

Don't let the bugs bite.

23.14: Sam Carter

Sir! I'm serious. You're on your own.

23.14: Jack O'Neill

Carter, you'll leave this poor Colonel alone? How could you? You're not that mean, are you?

See you tomorrow.

Sweet dreams.

23.14: Sam Carter

'Poor Colonel'? Are you kidding me?

23.17: Sam Carter

Sir? Are you there?

23.19: Sam Carter

Damn it Colonel. You're not getting away with this; I'll talk to you tomorrow.

***

Monday, 14 July 2003

05.38: Jack O'Neill

Rise and shine.

And how are you this morning, Ms. Carter?

05.39: Sam Carter

Ms. Carter? No offence but, are you drunk?

Isn't it too early in the morning to start drinking? And don't forget that we have a briefing at 09.00.

05.39: Jack O'Neill

No, I'm not drunk. I'm just in a very good mood.

05.39: Sam Carter

Should I be afraid, Sir?

05.39: Jack O'Neill

You should.

05.39: Sam Carter

Alright. I'm not going to ask why you're in such a good mood then.

05.39: Jack O'Neill

You do that. See you in the briefing, Major.

05.39: Sam Carter

You just called me with this journal to say that you're in a very good mood?

05.40: Jack O'Neill

Yes. Anything wrong with that?

05.40: Sam Carter

Nothing. See you, Sir.

***

13.59: Jack O'Neill

Boring.

14.03: Jack O'Neill

Carter, respond.

14.06: Jack O'Neill

Major?

14.07: Sam Carter

Sir, I'm up for presentation in about twenty minutes. Can you please leave me alone?

14.07: Jack O'Neill

Just answer this one question. Why am I here?

14.07: Sam Carter

To know the progress that we have made so far, to be the General's representative, to pass some time, to lend me a moral support? I don't know. Pick one.

14.07: Jack O'Neill

Touché.

14.07: Sam Carter

Sorry, Sir. But I'm just a bit nervous.

14.07: Jack O'Neill

You? Nervous? Come on.

14.07: Sam Carter

Sir, every project that I've done in my lab costs a considerable amount of money. If I can't convince them that I am able to juggle my responsibility as a member as SG-1 and my commitment to these projects, I'm doomed.

14.07: Jack O'Neill

Take a deep breath, Carter.

14.07: Sam Carter

How dare they! They didn't even give me a warning.

14.08: Jack O'Neill

Calm down, Carter. It's not only you that they're after; every scientist that works here has to do this.

Besides, that's the whole point, isn't it? To catch all of the eggheads off-guard.

14.08: Sam Carter

I'm sorry for blowing up like that, Colonel. But to tell you the truth, I'm worried.

14.08: Jack O'Neill

And why is that? It's not that they're going to fire you. Who's going to save our butts next time the snakeheads attack us?

14.08: Sam Carter

Sir, I'm not worried about losing my job. I'm worried about them telling me to choose between SG-1 and my projects.

14.08: Jack O'Neill

I'm not going to let them do that. Hammond won’t either.

14.08: Sam Carter

But these men are not from the SGC, they won't listen to you or to the General. They don't know how important SG-1 is. They'll report straight back to the President. What if they decide that I'm not doing the job that I was paid to do?

They know what I can do. And we both know that developing the alien technology that we have so far to defend Earth from the Goa’uld is the main priority. So...

14.08: Jack O'Neill

Hey, the President likes me. Don't you worry; I'll put in a good word for you.

Now, smile! And don't frown like that; we're not in an imminent danger. We don't want you to have wrinkles so soon now, do we?

You'll do great. You'll impress those two men in black in record time so that they will recommend your promotion to the good ol' Prez. And when they do that, we'll make sure that your spot in SG-1 is not an option. It is a must.

14.08: Sam Carter

Men in Black? Good ol' Prez?

Are you sure you're not drunk, Sir?

14.09: Jack O'Neill

There you go. Nice smile, Major. But don't smile like that to any hot-blooded male; it could give you some troubles. And we don't want that, do we? But I know you can kick their butts, and if that ever happens, please let me know, I want to see it.

What's wrong with men in black? Those two Pentagon guys who assessed you wore identical black suits and sunglasses, and they are after aliens (sort of, indirectly anyway).

Me and the Prez go way, way, way back. We chat regularly on the phone.

Besides, this is only a ten minutes presentation, right? What could go wrong?

14.09: Sam Carter

Thank you, Sir.

For cheering me up and calming me down, I mean.

14.09: Jack O'Neill

No problem. I am famous of my calming effect on other people.

So, tell me why I am here again?

14.09: Sam Carter

I choose not to respond to your claim, Sir.

Well, the General wants you to make sure that those 'men in black' follow the rules; you are here to observe the assessment procedure.

14.09: Jack O'Neill

Oh, babysitting you mean?

14.09: Sam Carter

Well, yeah.

14.10: Jack O'Neill

And your moral support as well?

14.10: Sam Carter

If you don't mind, Colonel, I would very much like that.

14.10: Jack O'Neill

Hey, that's what superior officer is for.

So, what are you going to talk about to these fine gentlemen?

14.10: Sam Carter

My current projects I suppose. That's what they wanted us to do anyway.

14.10: Jack O'Neill

What happen of you fail this evaluation?

14.10: Sam Carter

I honestly don't know. You could get a warning, or you could get sack straight away. It depends on how productive you are, I suppose.

14.10: Jack O'Neill

That will explain those long faces in this room.

So, why are they doing this again?

14.10: Sam Carter

To see if all the money that have been put into their project are really paying off.

14.10: Jack O'Neill

How much is that exactly?

14.10: Sam Carter

I know my budget, but I'm not sure about the others.

14.11: Jack O'Neill

How much is your budget?

14.11: Sam Carter

A lot.

14.11: Jack O'Neill

You're not going to tell me, are you?

14.11: Sam Carter

I can divulge that information. Sorry.

14.11: Jack O'Neill

Nah, it's OK. I'm just curious, that's all.

14.11: Sam Carter

I'm going to do a last minute reading now; I'll talk to you again after the presentation.

14.11: Jack O'Neill

You'll be alright, Carter.

14.12: Sam Carter

Thanks, Sir.

***

14.51: Jack O'Neill

See, I told you that you would do great. You amazed them.

14.51: Sam Carter

You didn’t understand a word that I was saying up there, do you, Sir?

14.51: Jack O'Neill

Yes, and that's the indication that you were doing great.

14.51: Sam Carter

Thanks, I think.

14.52: Jack O'Neill

Carter, what did I said about your smile? This is a room full of Carter's fan club, don't do it too often.

14.52: Sam Carter

You're the one who made me smile.

PS: Carter's fan club?

14.52: Jack O'Neill

I'm starting to regret it.

PS: Yes. Didn't you know that most of the geeks here have a thing for you? And I don't mean your brain, I mean 'you', in flesh and blood.

14.52: Sam Carter

Really? You prefer me frowning than smiling?

PS: Really?

14.52: Jack O'Neill

Well, maybe not. But don't do it in a room full of your admirers. It'll only encourage them more.

PS: Yes, so stop smiling already. You could give us away.

14.52: Sam Carter

OK Boss.

PS: I'll try. But I don't think I could give us away, I could always say that someone sent a very amusing email through my Palm.

14.52: Jack O'Neill

And who will you say sent this email?

14.52: Sam Carter

You, of course.

14.53: Jack O'Neill

I see that you have your spirit back. Well done.

We should concentrate more on this assessment process.

14.53: Sam Carter

I think you're right.

14.53: Jack O'Neill

We'll talk again once this is finished. It's starting to get difficult to hide this Palm from the others.

14.53: Sam Carter

OK.

***

19.44: Jack O'Neill

Man, I'm so tired. I never knew that assessments could last this long. All you guys do is just talk and talk and talk and talk. But how can this feel tiring just to hear you talk?

19.44: Sam Carter

Maybe because you’ve heard us for a total amount of almost six hours, Sir.

19.44: Jack O'Neill

Six hours?

How did I manage to sit there for six hours doing nothing but listening to some geeks talking?

19.45: Sam Carter

Actually, Sir, you were having fun at their expense.

And don't bother denying it; I know that you were enjoying their nervousness.

19.45: Jack O'Neill

Maybe I was.

But it still didn't explain the tiredness part.

19.45: Sam Carter

You were trying your best not to laugh or snicker, Sir. That took a lot of effort. And that is so considerate of you, Sir.

19.45: Jack O'Neill

I guess you're right.

Hey, I saw one of the men in black talk to you after we finished, what did he want?

19.45: Sam Carter

Dr. Jenkins had been asking me about the naquadria. He's been studying it for a while now.

19.45: Jack O'Neill

That's it?

19.45: Sam Carter

That and he was wondering if he could buy me a drink afterwards.

19.45: Jack O'Neill

Oh, and what did you say?

19.45: Sam Carter

I said thanks but no thanks. To be completely honest, Sir, he's not my type.

19.45: Jack O'Neill

Really? What's your type anyway?

19.46: Sam Carter

The perfect gentleman who has the combination of good qualities of Daniel, Teal'c and you. With a pinch of General Hammond's charm. That ought to do it.

19.46: Jack O'Neill

In other word, the extinct type, the one that you could only find in cheesy romance novels, Carter?

19.46: Sam Carter

That's one way to put it.

19.46: Jack O'Neill

Your standard is too high; you know that, don’t you?

19.46: Sam Carter

Well, a girl could dream, right? Is not like I'm going to find Mr. Right anytime soon. Might as well set a ridiculously high standard.

What about you, Sir? What's your type of woman?

19.46: Jack O'Neill

I'm not too picky like you. For me, as long as she appreciates my sense of humour, loves the Simpson’s, doesn’t mind my working on a highly classified project, understands my sarcasm, realises that I wouldn't put her above my team, puts up with my bad moods, and doesn’t ask questions about my past, that should do it.

19.47: Sam Carter

In other words, the 'too good to be true' type, the one that could only exist in your dreams, Sir?

19.47: Jack O'Neill

Yup, that's the one.

19.47: Sam Carter

We're hopeless.

19.47: Jack O'Neill

Oh well, what's new?

19.47: Sam Carter

Enough about this, I need something to eat. Want to join me in the mess hall, Sir?

19.47: Jack O'Neill

Are you sure about the mess hall? I think it's full already. Most of the geeks were there last time I check. I guess all the presentation makes them hungry too.

19.47: Sam Carter

Oh please, Sir. This is me you're talking too. You always pull rank to get a table there.

19.48: Jack O'Neill

Good point. I'll see you there in ten minutes.

19.48: Sam Carter

See you there.

***

23.49: Jack O'Neill

Oy, Carter. I just realise something. Why Daniel wasn't getting assessed today?

23.50: Sam Carter

Well, today is for the science department. His is in archaeology; I don't know when his version of the men in black would come.

23.50: Jack O'Neill

Oh. OK.

23.50: Sam Carter

Why the sudden interest?

23.50: Jack O'Neill

Well, I figure that maybe aggravating Janet in order to get back at Daniel would be a little bit of overkill.

23.50: Sam Carter

I'm glad that you finally have some sense, Sir.

23.50: Jack O'Neill

Shut it, Major. I'm thinking here.

23.50: Sam Carter

Shutting up now. Good luck with the new plan.

23.50: Jack O'Neill

You realise that you have to help me with this, don't you?

23.50: Sam Carter

Just let me know what the plan is first, Sir. Then I *might* volunteer to help you.

23.51: Jack O'Neill

Remember your bike, Carter.

23.51: Sam Carter

OK, OK. I’ll help you. Jeez, I never thought that my bike would be this much of a burden. Should've bought a scooter instead.

It's cheaper too.

And easier to maintain as well.

Damn, I bought the wrong motorbike.

23.51: Jack O'Neill

O'Neill's second lesson in life: Know thy enemy.

23.51: Sam Carter

You treat me as your enemy? That hurt, Sir.

23.51: Jack O'Neill

Oh, cut the melodrama. What makes you think that I'm going to fall for that?

23.51: Sam Carter

Damn. That obvious, huh?

23.51: Jack O'Neill

Anyway, I'm going to start plotting this new plan. Daniel will get what he’s been asking for.

23.51: Sam Carter

I'll leave you to it, Sir. But may I remind you that Daniel is our friend, and please take into consideration what a hassle it was to look for his replacement when he was ascended.

23.51: Jack O'Neill

Your concern is noted, Major.

23.51: Sam Carter

OK then, I'm going to bed now. I have a long day today.

See you tomorrow.

And be gentle with Daniel.

23.52: Jack O'Neill

Good night, Carter. Sleep well.

23.52: Sam Carter

Back at you, Sir.

***

End Notes: Note: The next one will be 'His Cabin and Her Cactus', can't really say a lot about this one, as I'm only less than a half-way through. But hopefully it won't take me that long to finish it. Reviews, feedbacks and bloopers are very much appreciated. ;)

blue-topaz@lycos.com
http://fly.to/bluetopazfic/

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