Visit by Julia

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Story Notes: I've always wanted to write something with Charlie in it. And after listening to Herbert GrÃ¶nemeyer's song "Der Weg" , this just sprang to mind. Jack's note consists of lines from this song, translated into English by me. Oh yeah, no infringement intended there, either. Btw, I suck with titles, sorry.

Feedback: Most welcome!!!

Dedication: 1)To my Anna. She will probably never read this, since she doesn't even know the difference between Stargate and Star Trek, but nonetheless, this is for you. Just because. Get well soon.
2) To Matt. One day...

He stopped the car and pulled the key out of the ignition.

So far, so good.

He closed his eyes briefly, washing with his right hand over his face. That was the hardest. To actually get out of the car. But he'd done it before. And this year, he thought, this year he really wanted to do it. He really wanted to go there. Because this time he wasn't alone.

"Jack? Are you sure....?"

He turned his head and looked at her. Her blue eyes watched him concerned and he could also see sadness seeping through. And underneath all that he saw nervousness.

He knew why.

They'd known each other for eight years now. In the first seven years they had worked together and although they had been friends from the beginning and in the following years even something more, he had never or very rarely mentioned or talked about him. Of course everybody knew that he was there. Or that he once had been there. But nobody ever dared to approach the subject.

Nobody but Sam. But she'd only done so after the both of them had crossed the line between something more than friends and, well, *definitely* something more than friends. She'd said that she wanted to know everything about him. The way he'd laughed, cried and teased. The way he'd brought joy into his father's life.

And so he'd told her. He'd shown her all the photos and pictures of him. And finally, after years of suppressing and avoiding, he had been able to enjoy his memories.

And that's why they were here. Today. His anniversary.

Until today no one else but him or Sara had come to the place but this time Sam was with him.

"Jack? Are you sure I should come with you? I don't want to push you...."

"Hey", he grasped her hand and squeezed it lightly. "We talked about that. I want you to meet him. And I want him to meet you. It's important."

"Okay." She gave his hand an answering squeeze.

When Jack opened the iron gate, it gave away the obligatory squeaking sound and Sam had to suppress a smile at the obvious cliché. He caught her smile and when she motioned to the noisy gate, he rolled his eyes and grinned. "You gotta love it."

Still smiling, Sam stepped next to Jack and, entwining her fingers with his, stood on tiptoe to kiss him lightly on the cheek. Throwing her one of his, what she called the 'Charming-O'Neill-Grins' , he began to walk along the path, her hand still firmly resting in his own.

It was a beautiful day. Early May, all the trees and flowers in full bloom, it was easy to think you were walking in a park, rather than a cemetery. But then again, Sam thought, that wasn't necessarily a bad thing. In that way, people would enjoy their visits, and hopefully think of the more happy memories with their beloved, rather than the sad ones.

Leaving the main path, Jack led them across a small clearing to a birch that was growing near the fence at the end of the yard. At the foot of the tree, only a lonesome stone indicated that this was another grave. It was barely recognizable as such next to all the others which looked so dark and sad, because it was quite the contrary.

In contrast to the other stones, the only thing which was carved into it was one name: 'Charlie'. Nothing more. No dates, no prayers. Just 'Charlie.'

When they came to a halt in front of it, Sam smiled. Underneath the stone, the whole spot was dotted with daisies. Again, Jack caught her smile. "He loved daisies. They were his favorite."

Sam let go of Jack's hand and crouched down to have a better look. It really was beautiful. A bright and sunny spot in a place, where usually it didn't matter whether the sun was shining or rain was pouring down. But in this case, it was important. It was something special. Just like the person this spot was dedicated to.

They stayed at "Charlie's little garden", how Jack called this place, for hours, just watching and talking. Jack told Charlie everything that had happened the past year, so the stories were mostly about Sam. Some of them even made her blush.

When they were ready to leave again, Jack suddenly stopped. "Oh. I almost forgot..." He fumbled in his pocket and produced a white envelope. Crouching down, he put it next to the stone.

It had taken him over nine years to finally write something to his son. It had never been the right time or he had never found the right words. But a few days ago, he'd just done it. No real letter. Just a few sentences, swimming around in his head. But it was a beginning. He had sat and scribbled it down after he'd had a talk with Sam. Well, actually it was after Sam had told him that she was pregnant.

'You flooded each room with sunlight.
You turned any annoyance into the opposite.
Life isn't fair.
I don't go away.
I extended my time.
A new journey.
I hold you safe in my soul.
I carry you with me.
Until the curtain falls.
I carry you with me.'

At first, he had been afraid to show it to Sam. Somehow he'd been embarrassed, thought it was probably too kitschy or something. But Sam had looked at him after reading it and had said that it was beautiful and that he should give it to Charlie as soon as possible. So that's what he did.

Taking a last glance at the his son's grave, Jack slung his arm around Sam's shoulders and they slowly sauntered to the main path. When they were halfway there, Jack suddenly stopped and turned around.

"Jack, what is it?"

"Oh...I just forgot to tell him something else...."

"What?"

He didn't answer her. Instead he just threw her a smile and jogged back in the direction of Charlie's spot.

Sam was just about to follow him when she heard him.

This time she laughed out loud.

This was just so Jack. It was just so him to go back to his son and tell him at the top of his lungs.

"By the way, Charlie, you're going to be a big brother!"

End

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