The Futility Of Second Guessing by DustDevil

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Story Notes: EMAIL: dustdevil@btinternet.com

WARNINGS: Language, pretty mature themes

ARCHIVE: S&J Archive and Heliopolis, Yes. Others...please ask.

FEEDBACK: Yes please! Feeeeeeeeeeedbaaaaaaaaack...drool...

SPOILERS: Uh...don't think so...but it's set season 3.

"Hey guys! Come on in! Ooo you brought more than a six pack Daniel, I'm impressed"

Daniel deposits the beer into my hands and I smile as he passes, then sneer at the brand. Ugh, I teach that boy as much as I can, but some things never seem to sink in. Teal'c walks past me then and hands me a large brown paper bag. I rake my hand through the packets inside for a moment, fairly satisfied by what I see. The usual necessities and snacks, but I put the bag aside and suck in a breath as Sam enters. She smiles up at me, eyes sparkling, hair all smooth and sleek, body clothed in tight denim, and hands me a large case with a wink. Ah.I eye the brand and grin back at her. My favourite. And hers. This is real beer. She walks past me to the sitting room and I slide the beer into my fridge. Another night of pretending that we're drinking my beer excess before opening Daniel's, and his newest purchase joins the others at the rear. Probably never to be opened. Well, he tries.

I grab a quartet of alcohol, and the bottles clank between my fingers as I negotiate my way through to where the others are already sprawled across my furniture. Teal'c is sitting on a straight backed chair, and I see with a little sigh that Sam is sitting on the comfy single chair, legs curled up under her staring avidly at the TV as it blares commercials. I move towards the couch and slide down next to a fidgeting Daniel, who is obviously not happy about being moved from his favourite spot. Great. I watch him from the corner of my eyes, afraid for a minute that he'll ask Sam why she isn't in her usual place next to me, but thankfully he doesn't. I'd like to know that answer though. I'd like to know. Still, she's here isn't she? That has to be a good sign. Mind you, what excuse could she give for not coming? I guess she really didn't have much of a choice.

I settle quietly, and Sam leans forward and inserts the tape. I attempt to start a few conversations but Daniel shushes me as he's so intent on the film. After ten minutes I have come to the conclusion that I don't like it. To be honest it reminds me a little too much about some of the experiences we've had over the years. 'The Mummy' What kind of crap name is that for a film anyway? Danny spends the next hour and a half tutting and sniggering at every little archaeological mistake that occurs, and Sam spends her time laughing at Daniel. Teal'c just watches impassively, and I can feel myself getting bored. I feel like I'm left out. I mean, I know that if I said anything, I could get a conversation going or something, but the way Sam is ignoring me is driving me crazy.

I wish she'd look at me or something, I have to know everything's okay, I want to know how she feels..

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Fine.

Just fine.

I can't believe he went into his study to do some work. If that's not a clear signal then I don't know what is! He only managed to sit still for the first half hour of the film then he was out of here in a shot with a lame excuse about needing to do some last minute work for tomorrow, *and* he gave me a funny look as he left. I'd rather be doing reports than sit in the same room as you Sam. He might as well have said that out loud, it would have felt the same. I'm surprised he let me in the damn door, mind you, he did look a little surprised to see me. Well what was I meant to do, Danny came to pick me up and everything! I couldn't formulate a good excuse at such short notice.

Fine. I'm glad I'm sitting nearest the TV so no-one can see my face if I don't want them too. I'm not crying or anything, I just know I don't look like I'm enjoying a film at a friends house. Danny is still complaining, and Teal'c is quiet as ever, and I just fold my arms and stare at the screen with my teeth gritted. I'll be out of here as soon as I get the chance, you just watch me! I can't believe he's being like this, and I guess I should have realised it wouldn't work. What was I doing? And what was he doing? Ah forget it, I made a mistake, a rather large mistake and it looks as though I 'm going to have to spend the rest of my life paying for it. He could be a little more polite though and sit out here since he invited us to his house. I get the message Jack, you don't want me around so you don't have to worry, I'll leave as soon as it's okay to do so.

I just don't understand. Didn't he like last night? He certainly seemed to at the time, well if he did why isn't he out here with me? Doesn't he want to be? He wanted to be with me last night.Well it looks like he's changed his mind. I squidge further down in the seat and glare at a point on the wall above the TV and try to ignore Daniel's laughter.

Fine.

***************************************

I can't believe she's just sitting out there.

What is she doing? I can't hear her laughing or talking but that's probably just because Daniel's making so much noise. Well she's ignoring me that much is for sure. I couldn't stand sitting out there staring at the back of her head, and Daniel would have noticed sooner or later. What's the matter? Didn 't she like last night? God but she certainly seemed to enjoy it at the time, I thought she was going to rip all my hair out! Either that or scar my back for life. Not that I was complaining at the time you understand, hell no, it's just I kinda figured that that was the beginning of something, and the first time of many. Looks like I was wrong huh? What the hell am I gonna do now? I can't go back out there, I know she won't even look at me.

Hmm...

Wait a minute...what if she's worried what I think about last night? I'm pretty sure I made it damn obvious how much I like her. Okay, so we didn't really talk all that much, but she must realise it was more than a long and rather fantastic roll in the hay. I was a little surprised by the whole thing happening the way it did, and when she lay in my arms afterwards I was just too happy and dumfounded to say anything. I know what I wanted to say, I wanted to say I love you, I'm so happy, I want to be with you forever and all those sorts of things, but I just couldn't form the words. So we lay there for hours then she said she had to go. It was my day off today but she was due in early. So I walked her to the door and kissed her soundly, waving to her as she left. No, we didn't really talk about it, and no we didn't make anymore plans, or agree to meet again, but come on Sam, we weren't drunk, it wasn't like that and I thought you felt the same!

Damn.

What am I gonna do? If I don't go out soon the movie is gonna end and for all I know she'll just up and leave without telling me! And we have a mission tomorrow so I gotta speak to her tonight! I have to!

I should go in there, I really should...

Ah Jack, get a grip, just do it!

Do it!

**************************************

Daniel squeals suddenly and hides behind his pillow, only to look out with a sheepish grin whenever the scary whatever-it-was is gone. Isn't this movie awfully long? Well, whenever it's finished I'm out of here. I'll make my excuses and I'll leave without seeing him, because why should I make the effort if he isn't willing? God, this is all my fault. We all went out last night to the cinema, then back to Jack's house for a pizza. Eventually Daniel leapt out of his chair and told us he was expecting some important phonecall on base and him and Teal'c were gone up the road in a cloud of smoke. I took this as a cue to leave and started to walk down the path to my car. I turned at the kerb to look back at Jack and say goodbye, but he wasn't in his doorway where I left him, he was right in front of me, merely two foot away with a strange look on his face.

We just sort of stood there, looking at each other. He let me gaze into his chestnut eyes for a long moment while he gazed into mine, then his body jerked and his eyes flicked away. His hands picked at the hem of his shirt for a moment, then he spun on his heel and gave me a cheery wave and smile over his shoulder as he made to leave.

"Bye Sam!"

And then I moved. Without my permission my hand snapped out and caught at his sleeve and tugged him back around to face me. He stood there, eyeing my hand for a second, then his gaze travelled slowly up my arm and to my face. He wasn't angry, or shocked, just confused. And so was I. A few things flickered over his face then, and I let go of the soft material of his cuff and let my hand fall by my side. What the hell was I thinking? What was I doing? I couldn't think of a single thing to say or do, and I was left with the feeling that I'd made a rather large mistake. He must be wondering what the hell I was about to do, and to be perfectly honest I don't know either. I pull my hands together and the nervous fingers entwine as I give him a tentative smile. He still gazes steadily at me with a curious look, and so I copy his actions of before and turn and wave. I want to get out of here as quickly as possible.

"Uh...bye sir!"

I take one step away but am suddenly stopped by strong fingers closing around my forearm. The fingers tug me around, and once more I meet those brown questioning eyes, only now it's my turn to look confused. Why couldn't he just let me go? We stand there for what seem like ages, and his fingers just don't move, they remain firm, and the warmth starts to permeate through my sleeve. My mouth opens and my jaw moves, but no words form. I feel so nervous and unsure, but his face is confident and set. The confusion is gone, and has been replaced with some sort of resolve. His fingers loosen around my arm, and I feel bereft as they slide away, only to find my breath catching in my throat as they don't move away, they simply move downward till his fingers find mine, then they close around them, and my fingers instinctively respond. Our frosted breath rises slowly in the air, and the only sound I can hear is my own heart furiously pumping my heated blood around my body. Another matched breath is released and then his fingers tighten a little, and he starts to retract his arm, pulling me gently towards him.

I go. What else can I do? What else would I want to do? Another step and his hot mouth swiftly claims mine, his breath warming me, his lips thrilling me. His hands loop around me and press me into his firm form, and I go willingly....very willingly. I can only clutch at his shirt as he insists further entry and his writhing tongue darts between my teeth. I try and regain some semblance of control but he's not having it. He pulls his mouth away and I only have time to gasp for a breath before he jerks me with him and we go inside.

And that was merely the tip of the iceberg.

I blush despite myself at the memories and pull my own pillow up in front of my face, hiding my reddened cheeks. No, I will not think about it. If he regrets it then I'm going to treat it like it never happened. Maybe that's what he wants, maybe he just wants me to keep quiet and forget about it, maybe he thinks he can just carry on and everything will be the same, well I'm sorry sir, after that I'm afraid that things have changed. Maybe I should go in there and yell at him, maybe I should...Oh I don't know. For all I know he's waiting in there for me to go to him! Typical male if he is. Ah well, the film is drawing to an end now, maybe I should go see him now, stick my head around the door and tell him I'm off before the entertainment is over and we have an audience.

Right, this is it, I'm going in.

I climb quietly out of my seat and walk stiffly to the door of Jack's study. I stand for a moment, poised, uncertain, then I'm filled with a hard resolve and I reach to push the door only for it to be jerked out of my hand. I look up, my hand still hovering in the air and Jack's eyes meet mine as he holds onto the handle on the other side...

****************************************

I hiss at Teal'c to move faster, but he looks like he's in a trance. I bundle our jackets under one arm and take a hold of his shoulder, and after a bit of tugging I feel his weight shift and he follows me, his eyes still locked at what he sees across the room. I manoeuvre him to the doorway, but once there I have to let him go to fumble with the handle, and when I turn back to get him I see them.

Oh my...

I can feel my face redden at what I see, and I have to hurriedly duck my head away to avoid seeing any more. Teal'c just continues to stare and I nudge him. Don't they have discretion on Chulak?

"Teal'c!" I hiss, and this time he finally turns to look at me, both eyebrows raised. Yeah, yeah Teal'c, I know. I urgently jerk my head towards the doorway, and he takes one look back behind him and follows me out into the cool night air. Once outside I release a long thankful breath, and allow myself to lean against the stonework of Jack's house, but certain noises from inside spur me onward, and I trot and stumble down the driveway to my car. I fling the jackets inside and crack the drivers door, and Teal'c gets in the other side. Once there I feel a crazy grin stretch my face and when I look at Teal'c I swear his face is showing signs of amusement.

"Daniel Jackson, I believe I am confused"

"Confused?" I ask, marvelling that he must have been blind all this time.

"Confused, not surprised" He adds, and his minute grin grows a little, making me add to my own. Man I'm gonna have sore face muscles tomorrow. I shake my head at Teal'c and gun the engine, and soon we're leaving Jack's house far behind as we head for the base.

Those two, those two idiots! I had finally decided that I was going to do that research on the artefacts SG5 brought back months ago today, but I spent all day being besieged by my friends. First I had an hour long heart to heart with a nervous and jittery Sam, then, to my surprise Jack turned up and started fiddling with some ancient pottery. By then of course I knew the score, knew what had happened between them, but in Jack's case it took me two hours to open him up! Those two really have a serious communication problem...So I spent all day listening to both of them say 'I don't know what to do, did they like it? Do they like me? Oh I like him/her, I think I love him/her, what if they don't?, what should I do?' Three hours, I had three hours of this. So, they spent all this time talking to me and they never once thought about talking to each other? For God's sake guys why didn 't you just think to ASK?

Sigh...

Teal'c leans back in the passenger seat and closes his eyes, and I shake my head.

Second guessing, what a waste of time. So they were both nervous as hell tonight, unsure, and boy did it show. I thought by the end of the film I was going to have to do something drastic considering Jack had skulked off in fear to his study and Sam was getting more and more annoyed where she sat. But no, they actually managed to deal with it themselves for once, albeit in a highly embarrassing way for me and Teal'c. I was just sitting there, waiting for the credits to roll when she sprang up and went to his door, her hand snaking out to yank it open when it opened from the inside, and Jack was standing there. I could feel the tension in the room, and I just sat dumbfounded for a minute as they stared at each other, willing one of them to speak.

"Daniel Jackson, you have left your shoes" Comes a voice from beside me, and I turn to see that Teal'c's eyes are slitted and downcast. I shift uncomfortably on the seat, and wiggle my socked feet on the pedals.

"I know Teal'c, I'll get them tomorrow" I say, and he nods and closes his eyes once more.

I think I made the right choice.

It was either leave when we did or stop and get my shoes and try to get them on while they...well...got IT on. After all the talks I had with them today and all the advice I gave I really thought at least one of them would try that little thing called 'talking' that's so very important in relationships, but apparently they both simultaneously decided that ripping each others clothes off and getting to it in the doorway between his study and the lounge while guests were watching seemed the best solution.

And hell, go for it guys, sometimes you can say more with uh...actions that you can with words, and 'action' certainly seemed to be foremost on their minds. Ah well. I smile then as I take the turn off for the mountain, and as I glance at Teal'c I swear he's still smiling, but he says nothing as usual, and I shake my head.

Talking...huh...it's overrated.

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THE END
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